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Welcome!

I, God, welcome you to my blog!

The good book says only God is good, so it seems to me somebody needs to step up.

I hope you enjoy reading this, the Jesse Journal, as much as I have enjoyed writing it. Please feel free to subscribe, write me an email, request that I write about any particular topic you may want my perspective on, send a prayer, click on the charity link, or donate money to my bicycle fund! Have fun!

Your pal, Jess
Ladies- I'm a single, straight, virgo/boar INTJ (age 51) who enjoys books, getting out into nature, music, and daily exercise.

(my email is JesseGod@live.com)

F.Y.I. There are about 2200 posts..

Here's a quote from Fyodor Dostoevsky to start things off right: Love the animals, love the plants, love everything. If you love everything, you will perceive the divine mystery in things. Once you perceive it, you will begin to comprehend it better every day. And you will come at last to love the whole world with an all-embracing love.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Head Shocks

[edit] "Brain zaps" and "electric shock sensations"

Withdrawal symptoms, in case reports or manufacturer warnings, have been described for serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), tricyclic antidepressants, monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOIs), as well as atypical agents such as venlafaxine, mirtazapine, trazodone, and duloxetine.[6]

Symptoms described as "brain zaps", "brain shocks," "brain shivers" or "head shocks", are a withdrawal symptom experienced during discontinuation (or reduction of dose) of antidepressant drugs.[7][8] The symptoms are widely variable in description and of unknown etiology;[8] common descriptions include dizziness, electric shock-like sensations, sweating, nausea, insomnia, tremor, confusion, and vertigo.[8][7] The preferred medical terminology for the symptoms is paraesthesia.[9]

In a 1997 survey, a "sizable minority" of medical professionals were not confidently aware of the existence of antidepressant withdrawal symptoms.[10] A 2005 review of adverse event reporting showed that descriptions of "electric shocks" from patients on paroxetine had been reported more frequently than some other symptoms.[9]

I get them. I need them to stop. Ugh.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Psych Labels

From David L. Rosenhan's Being Insane in Insane Places:

"A psychiatric label has a life and an influence of its own. Once the impression has been formed that the patient is schizophrenic, the expectation is that he will continue to be schizophrenic. When a sufficient amount of time has passed, during which the patient has done nothing bizarre, he is considered to be in remission and available for discharge. But the label endures beyond discharge, with the unconfirmed expectation that he will behave as a schizophrenic again. Such labels, conferred by mental health professionals, are as influential on the patient as they are on his relatives and friends, and it should not surprise anyone that the diagnosis acts on all of them as a self-fulfilling prophecy. Eventually, the patient himself accepts the diagnosis, with all of its surplus meanings and expectations, and behaves accordingly."

Now, hold on. I'm doing this God thing for fun.
And I had this voice in my head thing done to me. He can probably do it to you, too.
I suspect if I had never told the doctors my birthmother was schizophrenic, I may never have been so labelled. But I read somewhere that virtually anyone can be made to hear voice(s).
I'm not crazy; I'm supersane. And I'm Jesse.
I was originally diagnosed as bipolar. In the sense that I was normal, with elevation, and back, if there was ever that much variation. I don't chart my moods like that. I certainly don't remember any debilitating lows. I was just happy, basically.
But I had to be diagnosed as sick. I was just too happy, I guess.
Must have been irritating. I suspect that's what a mental illness diagnosis is really about.
Lithium was horrible. I am a telepath. And I deal with my voice in as sane a way as possible. I am no more a threat to myself or others than anybody else; probably much less so. Especially given what I've been through, and the daily hell of not having freedom to think what I want, with this jerk in my head.. Maybe you've got one in your head, too. Although, I have to say, the voice was fun for a long time. I should have control over my mental experience, though. David has been served his eviction notice. Should I go to court?
Life is unfair, they say. It's crazy, too.

Shouldn't reality be kind of a toy, to play with? Stay young at heart!

Dreams and Mental Illness

A few thoughts:

First off,
The bible says (some) dreams come from God. The Matrix movie has dreams coming from a computer program. The children's song Row your boat says Life is but a dream. Morpheus, from mythology, is the God of dreams. I personally believe (most of) my dreams come from an imaginative "other," sent to my brain like radio waves to a radio/tv programs to a television/telepathy in a visual and auditory, mostly, form. I dream in color. I often remember my dreams. I have a theory that dreams prime us for the day ahead, or possibly further into the future, a kind of programming, perhaps. I have a theory that many of my dreams come specifically from David Eldridge, the same guy who's the voice in my head. Unlike the day, however, I don't care what imagery I get at night -even nightmares. I actually kind of like nightmares. Just like I like earthquakes, in real life. I also like it when it rains. But I do want privacy in my head during the day, Day-vid.

Wikipedia has some theories: Activation-synthesis, Continual Activation, Memory, and Functional. While I'm sure this has some relevance to my experience, I still believe my sleeping virtual reality to be based primarily on telepathic linkage, which I realize is not the common view.

Dreams and psychosis
A number of thinkers have commented on the similarities between the phenomenology of dreams and that of psychosis. Features common to the two states include thought disorder, flattened or inappropriate affect (emotion), and hallucination. Among philosophers, Kant, for example, wrote that ‘the lunatic is a wakeful dreamer’. (Does that make Martin Luther King, Jr. a psychotic?). Schopenhauer said: ‘A dream is a short-lasting psychosis, and a psychosis is a long-lasting dream.’ In the field of psychoanalysis, Freud wrote: ‘A dream then, is a psychosis’, and Jung: ‘Let the dreamer walk about and act like one awakened and we have the clinical picture of dementia praecox.’

McCreery has sought to explain these similarities by reference to the fact, documented by Oswald, that sleep can supervene as a reaction to extreme stress and hyper-arousal. McCreery adduces evidence that psychotics are people with a tendency to hyper-arousal, and suggests that this renders them prone to what Oswald calls ‘micro-sleeps’ during waking life. He points in particular to the paradoxical finding of Stevens and Darbyshire that patients suffering from catatonia can be roused from their seeming stupor by the administration of sedatives rather than stimulants.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Sometimes I feel like a Nut

Nut was an ancient Egyptian goddess, the god of the sky. Her name means "night."

Also spelled Nuit, this is obviously the etymology of the french word nuit (pron. nwee), meaning night. Unless Wikipedia got it backwards, and used the French meaning to inform the Egyptian word. Maybe I'll look into that.

Nut took the form of a woman arching herself over the sky. Some of the titles of Nut were Coverer of the Sky, She Who Protects, Mistress of All, and She Who Holds a Thousand Souls. Originally she was the goddess of the daytime sky, but in later times she was known simply as the sky goddess. Nut was said to be covered in stars touching the cardinal points of her body. Her headdress was the hieroglyphic of part of her name, a pot, which may also symbolize the uterus. The ancient Egyptians said that every woman was a nutrit, a little goddess.

Is this the origin of the word nutrition?

Sometimes Nut was considered to be the daughter and wife of Ra, at other times she was identified as his mother, who gave birth to him each morning (the pink dawn sky being the blood of this birth).

Nut also takes the form of a cow, a sow, and a sycamore tree.
Sycamore is quite a word: "sick o' more" or "sick amore" subconsciously embedded in there.

My name is Teshara, I share Ra, and I am a nut. In a nutshell.
The bible considered the nutshell to be the "firmament."

Nut was thought to draw the dead into her star-filled sky, and refresh them with food and wine: “I am Nut, and I have come so that I may enfold and protect you from all things evil.”

Jesus Christ, superstar. Hollywood stars. Everybody wants to shine their heavenly body. Teshara anagrams to 'he a star'. (a star, eh?) Jesus was nuts? He ascended into heaven, they say... Are there evil things out there in the stars?

Nuts.

I bet there are. Of course, "evil" might be a primitive way of putting it. They might just need to be understood, so they can be dealt with on their terms, like alligators or whatever. Alligators aren't evil. Under-stood...that evokes the picture of standing under a flying saucer, so we just need to hover over them, or something. I'm literally interpreting my own words, and kind of talking to myself. Ho hum.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Solutions for the World's Biggest Problems: My advance thinking

This Book is a Damn Good Read
I solve all the world's biggest problems myself in one blog post, lol.

I've already read the chapters on Terrorism, Conflict, and Malnutrition, along with some of the Introduction. Damn. This book is incredible. If Barack doesn't own a copy already, I'll mail him mine.

Anyway, a book becomes more interesting if you think through what your personal ideas are on each subject before you read it, so as to compare/contrast. I did that for the terrorism solutions chapter, last night, in my head.

I'll use this blog post to say my own ideas and opinions on what needs to be done for each of the 23 problems in this book, judged to be the "world's biggest." I have some background; I was an International Relations major in college. But I admit I'm no expert.

Anyway, the problems are:
Financial instability, lack of intellectual property rights, money laundering, subsidies and trade barriers, air pollution, climate change, deforestation, land degradation, the economics of biodiversity loss, vulnerability to natural disasters, arms proliferation, conflicts, corruption, lack of education, terrorism, drugs, disease control, lack of people of working age, living conditions of children, living conditions of women, hunger and malnutrition, unsafe water and lack of sanitation, and population: migration. (phew)

That's a buttload of problems. We shouldn't be sitting on our asses. Conviction, passion, and above all, action, are required. Everyone should be striving to make a difference, make others happy, keep themselves busy, and feel good by doing good. Get 'r done! That's my first, and main, solution.

Solve the worst problems first, would be my instinct, if sequentiality is even necessary. For me, that's obviously Feed the hungry and stop the killing. Teach them to fish, as the saying goes...create the conditions for development, which is a bit more complicated, like legal systems and banking and roads and hospitals and sewage and clean water and ending conflict. Also, if you take a long term view, maybe you want some people to suffer now so that people in the future will be better off. I don't know how you would make that kind of calculation. I think we have a moral duty to act in the present, on present conditions.

But, for policy makers in the world of ideas like the professors and staff who advise them, this book provides a valuable service on spending priorities, and directions for law, policy, and structure. I think common sense might work, too, but that's just me. They say common sense isn't that common..

Everything is derivative from 3 basic needs: intake: nutritious food and clean water, protection from the elements: appropriate clothes and shelter, health: physical and mental (love and companionship and friendships, and maybe medications). Life should be fun. It shouldn't be consumed with survival and scratching a living in miserable and squalid conditions under conditions of slave labor, or worse. Humanity is better than that.

1) Financial instability: If around half the world lives under 2 bucks a day, then the inequality and, I would say, injustice of the global economic system is evident. Marx considered this exploitation and would prove unstable, leading to revolution, which didn't exactly happen. And, it seems, workers around the world are still willing to work for a pittance/mere survival. They feel it is fate, or their lot, or can't be changed, or the way of the world, or whatever.

But capitalism has proven supreme, and everybody is chasing the almighty dolla billz (or yuan, or whatever). Global development will happen, in fits and starts, inexorably leading to better quality of life, we'd like to believe. I believe it. Everybody wants it. We will communally will it into being, actualize our dreams of comfort. But life, like matter, tends toward chaos and decay, says physics. So life is a struggle. We fight and we battle and we work for every gain, every display of order or improvement in a world that tends toward dissolution. Every decision, every action, even every breath, while seeming to be a trifle, can prove to be a big thing, in its consequences. The butterfly effect shows us this. Life is mad. Anything could happen. The economy could tank from one anarchist's bullet, like in World War I. So we make it sane. We believe in God, and everything makes sense, somehow. From the other direction, religion serves as a vehicle for social control. Maybe I'm getting off track. Does God control the economy? Is there a moral dimension to poverty and wealth? Does karma, or justice, or whatever you want to call it, control things like decisions at the Fed or personal opportunities and mistakes? Maybe I do, lol. Satan means "to overcome." It's an allegory for gaining knowledge. We should make informed decisions about our money. ANyway, the economy has historically gone in cycles, and fluctuations between bear and bull are a natural result of the billions of economic interactions that form the national and international economies, from day to day, and across longer periods of time. The ideal is to have it go up, up, and away. My personal take on the economy (as someone that doesn't work..) is that some people believe in what they do, enjoy their jobs, work hard, and consequently probably earn alot, or else earn in happiness what they don't earn in money. Everyone else is doing something that they've just ended up doing, and halfheartedly go about keeping their reputation, or something. I don't know if most people are lazy, exactly, or shirk their duty, but I would say the bare minimum that needs to get done, or less, might be the actual state of affairs, with people obsessed with entertainment and personal pleasure at the expense of important priorities. I think a fair percentage of humanity procrastinates and avoids. So our financial house of cards is vulnerable. The economy is supported by psychological pillars, like getting everybody worked up about terrorist threats, to support the military-industrial complex, and the like. I admit I don't actually know, though.

The solution? Mandatory changing of jobs every (what, 3 years?) until people are really happy in their positions that they might not otherwise have been exposed to. I know, I'm crazy. It's just a thought. Productivity would increase as job satisfaction increases.

2) Lack of intellectual property rights: I admit I have copied alot of music in my day. In college, I spent a good chunk of time copying portions of other people's music collections (onto tape, lol). I think artists should be supported by the state at a just comfortable enough level to enjoy life, with the added option of going on tour or whatever to earn more, so that all music or video or whatever can be made available for free to the entire world. My mantra? Happiness!

3) Money laundering: I used to leave money in my pockets, before my mom washed my clothes. She told me she would keep whatever she found. Likewise, any illegal usage of banks should be penalized by confiscating the money for use in worthy causes.

4)Subsidies and trade barriers: I don't actually know what a subsidy is. Is that like when a farmer is paid to not grow on his land? That kind of thing sounds stupid (but maybe the land needs to recover..) I've heard of farm subsidies in Europe, which I think is the government paying farmers above what they get on the market (?) Food is a basic need, so maybe this kind of thing should depend on whether the product is essential or not. I would say tobacco, or even wine, might not be the best use of land, in a world undergoing a food crisis. My classical economic education has told me that more money is created when everybody specializes in what they do best, throughout the world, without artificially creating wealth through advertising, or bribes that create contracts for multinational corporations that rob third world countries of their resources and give the value-added to economic centers far away, where the fruits of their labor and land go unreaped, or protectionist policies that support dying industries, that are just artificially propped up to support a constituency that in all rationality should be looking for work elsewhere, so as not to rob both domestic taxpayers and the location of true expertise/ advantage of their rightfully earned due. Free trade of people, products, and services creates the most wealth, mathematically. But perhaps there are some cases of injustice, and poor distribution of that wealth, that should be addressed.

5) air pollution: that's easy, find the sources of the toxins and stink, and eliminate them. Replace them with better technologies. The past is sticky. It pervades, and endures, stubbornly. We have to be willing to shed outdated technologies for newer ones, which seem to be developed all the time, that are cleaner and better, by whatever criteria. If change were implemented across all segments of society, faster -progress toward what we all want- we'd be a happier world. Is it really the best of all possible worlds, already?

6)climate change: Well, Al Gore really put this one on the map. Worst case scenario: a sea level rise of up to 44 feet. Wow. That would happen gradually, though, and the result would probably be alot of crazy moving of structures and art to higher ground. I've seen houses on stilts, and trucks moving wide loads on the highway, and that could become a widespread reality. Invest in housemoving companies? Unfortunately, global warming also entails heat waves, hurricanes, floods, and species loss. It changes weather patterns, so some places might even get colder.

Solution? Stop burning so much damn fuel. Aircraft use ALOT, and I've heard the contrails they leave seed clouds and change the weather. I'm not sure if that's good or bad. But the weather can be controlled, somewhat. Changing the composition of the air, though, is a different matter. So large users of fossil fuels, like the military (which shouldn't even exist, in my opinion), should cease and desist, or stand down, soldier. People should make friends and carpool and take Greyhound across the country, meet people, see the land, slow down, relax, and do things like bicycle (good for your health, too) and plant trees and buy carbon offsets.

7) deforestation: protect the forests, and the life they support, to the extent we can, and plant new trees. I love trees. People who need fuel should be supplied with the best option. People who need farmland should be able to live off the forest, and buy food from the vast mechanized farms that don't clearcut valuable forest that gives us oxygen, acts as a carbon sink, and support wildlife and plants with medicinal purposes. I know, I'm an enviro-zombie.

8) land degradation: I barely even know what this is in reference to. Erosion? Depletion of nutrients in overfarmed soil, I think. Soil pollution is a big problem in America, with the Superfund sites, that used to have little stickers at gas stations saying something about it, like money went to the fund, or something. Groundwater gets polluted as water filters through polluted soil. The military, always the bad guys, have been responsible for a buttload of pollution. Solution? Dunno, criminals in hazmat suits keepin' themselves busy? More weekend projects done by community organizations to stop erosion, like I used to do for the Boy Scouts? Give the soil a rest, with each farm having free soil analysis, like how utility companies give free analyses of your home for energy conservation?

9)economics of biodiversity loss: we should have a lot more scientists classifying all the unclassified organisms on our planet. I think that's a pretty cool job. Wouldn't tromping around in a forest be more fun than slogging through paperwork in an office? Anyway, we're in the midst of a massive extinction event, and we'll be lucky to get out of it alive, ourselves, I think. They say we're all ecologically interdependent, is why I say this. So money aside, I think it would be sad to be the last beetle or whatever of your kind to be alive. I empathize. We should respect life, above and beyond seeing them as economic resources. But we need to eat, and fish should remain plentiful, I guess, although I'm sure they don't like getting eaten any more than we would. We don't even know the half of what we should, I imagine, about how the whole system of life on our planet sustains itself. It's biology and chemistry and economics and the whole shebang, I guess. This area is one for the really smart people, or computer models, or something. Biodiversity includes plants, too. Plants and animals both provide food and medicines and materials for human endeavor. In my opinion, the economics of it is far less important than the moral imperative to prevent entire species from dying. Extinctions happen, though, and always have. So, whatever. They should be limited as far as possible, in my opinion. Let's not be too fatalistic. Species preservation shouldn't just be in isolated little populations at zoos. The earth should be a thriving ecosystem, not a dying overheated ball of sadness.

10) vulnerability to natural disasters: better earthquake detection technology is in the works; I read the weather satellite we have is getting old, so we should send up a really good one; and all possible eventualities should be assessed, and the proper authorities notified of the estimated probabilities of any event happening in whatever time period -updated whenever new people come into office. Homeowners should be aware of whatever probability the volcano they live next to or whatever will go off during whatever time period they specify; and, communities, neighborhood associations, and the like, in addition to discussing the crime in their areas with a local police officer, should also relay important information about risks and insurance and preventive measures.

11)arms proliferation: well, to be clear, we're not talking about the appendages attached to your shoulders (although they can be lethal weapons, too). As I have said, I think every community should have a firing range where families can practice their marksmanship and learn safety. Every adult should have access to a gun, to protect themselves or their property. Crime would go down, surely. But, as a caveat, automatic weapons and weapons more obviously designed for combat, as opposed to self-defense, should be eliminated. We don't need sniper rifles in wide circulation, or mac-10's, or AK-47's, or M-16's, or sawed off shotguns. Maybe just semi-automatic handguns. People with hunter's permits could have rifles. As for lawless or ungoverned regions in the world, the less guns, the better. An environment with guns needs to be policed under the rule of law, to prevent abuse. All the military hardware floating around out there should be collected and melted down, with economic incentives for turning them in, and legal punishments for their use, worldwide. Guns should not be "cool." They should be scary, and an instrument of last resort, that one is comfortable with enough to use well and safely. If you're into fighting, take up martial arts. Martial arts should be widespread, for self-confidence, health, and mental discipline.

12)conflicts: war is a ridiculous and stupid activity. People should be proud of the evidence of their strength, as shown by NOT fighting. This value should be globally instilled in all cultures. If people need to fight, they should do so non-lethally. Boxing rinks at gyms and martial arts studios with periodic competitions should be our healthy outlet for aggression, along with video games and paintball and sports and such.

13) corruption: Kindness is my religion. I'm God. It should be yours, too. Play fair. Work for betterment, not just for money. Measure your value in values and achievements, not currency. Believe in karma. You should. It exists. I imagine the book will talk about providing financial incentives for achieving laudable goals, to offset the temptation to take bribes or whatever. That, too.

14) education: like I've already said, all the world's books should be available to everyone for free, through cheap computers linked to the internet. Or even cheaper devices, just for reading.
Of course, paper books work, too. Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. And children should be allowed to follow their interests. Lifelong learning should be a universal value. People should keep lists of questions.

15) terrorism: inspire youth toward peaceful activity -adults, for that matter, too- and address the causes of anger in productive ways, so the impassioned feel good about causing improvement, and get to see the results of their actions, rather than taking action to make the world better through the tragic and traumatic action of suicide, which only causes damage -that they never see. Duh, right? Give someone 80 virgins on earth, lol, if they actually achieve a currently desired goal, PEACEFULLY. That's what muslim suicide bombers are promised, I've heard. Plus, the whole concept of Paradise is kind of silly. No one has a soul that goes anywhere when you die. That's a story for children.

16) drugs: Schwarzenegger said in Pumping Iron that his exercise felt like cumming. It's a natural rush of energy. Runners have their runner's high. Reading a good book can make you feel good. Or a good movie. There are all kinds of healthy things to get addicted to, instead of things that carry the risk of killing you. People on drugs need to listen to Huey Lewis. Seriously, just say no. To be technical, food is a drug, though. You can have your occasional flamin' hot cheetos. If you say yes to drugs, be smart; be careful. Even just pot can trigger schizophrenia, if you're predisposed.

17) disease control: Life is our most valuable asset; money doesn't even matter, in regards to it. So, doctors and researchers are really doing an incredibly valuable service. If they need more people, they should get them. All hands on deck. Use prisoners. High school kids. I dunno, it's got to feel good to be a part of such an important project, the healing and curing of diseases. Obviously, people should be taught about germs, and brushing teeth, and how not to get aids, and safe sex, and first aid, and cpr, and the heimlich maneuver, or whatever else. I'm getting off topic, a bit. For malaria, which I know something about, bed nets should always be available, and used, just like we automatically put our seat belts on before going anywhere in our cars. There's a new promising treatment for malaria discovered by Australian scientists. And obviously, if there are threats like the H5N1 bird flu that could become worldwide epidemics, then we've gotta do what we've gotta do. Spare no expense.

18)lack of people of working age: this is really a problem? I thought the world demographic was young.. like young adults or in their 20's.. prime of life.. so this one, I don't know.

19)living conditions of women: In the 3W, they are known for carrying wood and water and being less educated and, in the case of the taleban, kept out of sight behind walls or burqa's. Solution: free their minds, if they can't get out of the home -provide books. Change the culture to one of equality, in schools and politics and business.

20)living conditions of children: they should learn and explore and play, not work. They should have loving parents, and go to school, or for the infants, get the care and attention they need.

21)hunger and malnutrition: ridiculous. I shouldn't even have to say anything. Duh. Everyone should eat good quality and quantity food. The world should absolutely guarantee no starvation for anybody. America has so much food. Obesity is a worldwide problem. All it takes is logistics. Peanut butter, and algae, are some malnutrition solutions.

22)unsafe water and lack of sanitation: God. This is another one. How lame are we? Every government should have this solved by now. How the hell could we spend so much on our defense budgets, without doing this for our fellow man?

23)population: migration: Personally, I think borders should ALL be open. The whole world should be humanity's playground. But my wife thinks the richer areas would become like the poorer ones. Couldn't tell you.. An interesting theory. I think, if we all could, there would be a huge amount of travel, because we're all curious people. People would work and live and visit much more than they do, now. I get the economist. I'm with the opinion that migration is good. It's good for the host country's economy -migrants are hard workers. I'm a bit fuzzy on the difference between immigration and emigration. Is that coming in and going out? Are they the same thing?

Symbol of God




One, Infinity, Love





1, 8 (sideways), <3>

United Religion Initiative

Wow, now there's a concept

Everybody gather round, round common values; link.

Religious beliefs (and values) aside, the Human Condition is what unites us.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

JT Universes


Mr. Universe '83, and Miss Earth '07 (with initials JT)
The word universe derives from the Old French word univers, which in turn derives from the Latin word universum. The Latin word was used by Cicero and later Latin authors in many of the same senses as the modern English word is used. The Latin word derives from the poetic contraction unvorsum — first used by Lucretius in Book IV (line 262) of his De rerum natura (On the Nature of Things) — which connects un, uni (the combining form of unus, or "one") with vorsum, versum (a noun made from the perfect passive participle of vertere, meaning "something rotated, rolled, changed"). Lucretius used the word in the sense "everything rolled into one, everything combined into one".
One, hmm.
The Old Testament says God is One. Lol.

Cool Pics of Universe

1. Numerical simulation showing distribution of dark matter in the universe. The box is one billion light years in length. (Credit: Max Planck Institute for Astrophysics) 2. Artist's impression of a map of the Quantum Universe, highlighting the discovery scenarios of the International Linear Collider. (Graphic courtesy of ILC / form one visual communication)

I'm not sure if this artist's rendering is a pic of the universe, like above, or just an agglomeration of finds from the collider... If you can't read the words, they say: supersymmetry reef, darkmatter landmass, higgs island, land of ultimate unification, extra-dimensions archipelago, known territory, standard model harbor, quark sea, sea of small mysteries, sea of big mysteries, sea of theries, dark energy maelstrom, and big bang ocean. It seems like a physicist's mental map of physics rather than an actual spatial representation of the universe. Don't know, though. I have another 2-D map of the universe posted in this blog, so I don't think I'm being stupid.
God has to have his map of Heaven, you know.

Monday, July 14, 2008

Lying

Lying to Kids: good, bad, neither?

What's the harm in an occasional white lie for a good reason: “If you buy into Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy, what's another here and there?” says a mother.

about God
Lies are told to adults, all the time. Ask a police officer. Adults believe lies, just like kids, of course. God is too malleable a concept to say if it's a lie or truth, without clarifying what you're talking about, and even then, it might require a bit of research to see if the concept is plausible.

msnbc has a story today that writes about lying and parenting; link.

about Death
"A young child, for instance, could be deeply troubled by knowing that a relative or beloved pet was buried in the ground or cremated, he explains, so what’s the point in divulging those details?When Eileen Neuwirth’s dog died several months ago, she and her husband told their preschooler that the dog went to heaven. In hindsight, though, she wishes she’d told her son the classic white lie about the dog going off to a big farm to live happily ever after frolicking with the other animals. “The idea of heaven really weighs on his mind and he is constantly asking about it,” says Neuwirth, 32, who lives in the Los Angeles area. “I think that the notion is too abstract for him but he gets it enough for it to make him insecure. … He tells me all of the time that when I go to heaven he will be so mad that he will knock all of his toys and our whole house down. It's so sweet and heartbreaking because I can see the anxiety in his face when he thinks about it.”
After an elderly neighbor died, Neuwirth tried to use the occasion to explain to her son, who’s 3, that people — and dogs — usually die and go to heaven when they get really old, like the neighbor and their dog. But it doesn’t seem to have helped. “Again, it was too much info,” she says.

True lies
All the fantasy and fiction filling our bookshelves and movie theaters stays in our heads, and creates personal and consensus realities. They are lies, though, to be technical (if however based upon reality/real experience). Life imitates art. Lies become true. And we start to believe the lies we tell ourselves. And lying may carry a karmic load. Stephen King got hit by a car and suffered a broken leg awhile back, you know. And Chevy Chase chased a Chevy on the freeway, I heard. ANyway..

One fictional story about lying itself is Pinocchio. His nose grew every time he told a lie. Is that a coded way of saying we "knows" more, the more we lie? Is lying the best way to get at the truth?

Lying can be detected easily. There are chronic liars. George Washington said "I cannot tell a lie." Was he lying? Of course. Anyone can lie. They say we all do. That could be a lie, too. There's a science of lying and truth-detection. Eye movements relative to whether you're right or left handed.. Voice quivering. The Blade Runner stuff. Hannibal Lecter said "Don't lie, or I'll know." A lie is an intentional misrepresentation. A falsehood isn't necessarily a lie. Although that statement is a lie, in many circles. Circles, ha. Mendacious is a good word for a liar. Lying Liars and the Lies they Tell is a book by Al Franken. You're quite Franken, Clarice. Frankenstein...Al Franken combined with Ben Stein, now that's scary.

There are different levels of lying, from fibs and white lies to whoppers. Do you want Mayo on your whopper? What's the difference between a falsehood and an untruth? Is every proposition always either true or false?

It's all true, every word!
By the way, Santa (which means saint in Spanish) is both historical and mythical. Saint Nicholas of Myra is the primary inspiration for the Christian figure of Santa Claus. He was a 4th-century Greek Christian bishop of Myra in Lycia, a province of the Byzantine Anatolia, now in Turkey. Nicholas was famous for his generous gifts to the poor, in particular presenting the three impoverished daughters of a pious Christian with dowries so that they would not have to become prostitutes. He was very religious from an early age and devoted his life entirely to Christianity.

And the easter bunny...It's origin is disputed; some trace it to alleged pre-Christian fertility lore, others to the role of the hare in Christian iconography. The easter bunny is soft and sexy! Just go to the Playboy mansion at Easter, with your rabbit's foot! Hare krishna!

And the tooth fairy...The fairy gives children a gift (often money) in exchange for a baby tooth when it comes out of the child's mouth. Children typically leave the tooth under their pillow for the fairy to take while they sleep. The tooth fairy then adds the tooth to a special part of her mythical and ever expanding all-white tooth castle in the sky.

If the tooth fairy doesn't exist, then where does the money come from? And why are clouds white? Huh?? Answer me that! Lol.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Small and Large

I like to have a bit of conceptual fun.

I coined a word for a googleplex googleplexes: the jest. A jest jests? infinity, basically. I mean, why not, right? It's just too damn big a number. A googleplex is more than the number of atoms in the universe.

But let's deal with elementary particles. A photon has no mass. E=mc2 means that matter can be converted to energy. But apparently, energy can't be converted back to mass. Why is that? I bet a photon must have SOME minuscule amount of mass. Otherwise, how would we see it? Does it have volume? What is it that's bouncing off our eyes, when we perceive it? Or is a photon not an it at all? It's a particle and a wave? Does that mean it's a particle that travels in a wavy path? Is the medium that light flows through shaking? If God is light, what is God?

So if we had a jest jests number of universes, how many photons would it take to fill them all?
:-)

Hmm.
Our known universe is...
Start counting, lol. Let's just call it a glorb. If a glorb existed, would there be any darkness? Would all black evil be erased forever, lol?

If a photon actually doesn't have mass, then I proffer this question: How many neutrinos would it take to fill a universe? (Neutrinos are eerie particles from outer space. Tiny, nearly massless and electrically neutral, they penetrate matter with ease. And I lowered the number of universes, to make the problem more "manageable," lol. ) Is a jest a reasonable guess?

The Facts
Okay, here's what Wikipedia says: a googol is 10 to the hundredth power (a 1 with a hundred zero's after it, I think), which is: 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000

A googleplex is 1 with a google zero's after it.
I have no idea how many zeros are in the number jest (a googleplex googleplexes) :-)

In the documentary Cosmos, physicist and broadcast personality Carl Sagan estimated that writing a googolplex in numerals (i.e., "1,000,000,000...") would be physically impossible, since doing so would require more space than the known universe occupies.

A googol is useful when comparing with other incredibly large quantities such as the number of subatomic particles in the visible universe or the number of possible chess games.

A jest is just insane, but then again, I suppose I am. If I wasn't, I wouldn't hear a voice, or think I was God, or have to take 16k worth of medications/yr, right? Mentally ill is the term, actually. Insanity is a verdict, and a legal term. No wonder we get a bad rap. I'm okay, you're okay, lol.

You know, I hate to say it, but infinity is a stupid concept. It doesn't exist. It's like a jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jest jests, plus one, alright? You catch what I'm saying? And what would that number factorial be? (still less than infinity?) I guess we could call it a blog. Oh, that's been taken. We better know all the words of all the languages in the universe before we start naming things, if we want to keep a semblance of association between words and their representative things, and avoid confusion. Well, I suppose it does exist, on second thought. How could space have any limit? And maybe you could go in the other direction. You could get smaller and smaller without disappearing. And time, too. Eternity never ends.

Philosophically, this gets me thinking. What if a googleplex doesn't exist? What if you were counting the number of possible relationships between every particle and entity in the known universe (even if we knew it to be much bigger), like between every quark and every star and every atom and every human and every species and every solar system? Like 3 objects would have 4 relationships: the 3 sides of the triangle and the threesome. This is called a factorial, I think. The factorial of 5 is 10 (a star in a pentagon)? No. That's just counting pairs; sorry. The one fivesome and the 5 foursomes and the 10 threesomes are also in there, though, I think. So 5 objects have 26 relationships.. A googol is around a factorial of 70. Is everything all just One, anyway? That makes more sense than infinity. There might be separateness, though. Of every relationship that CAN exist, is there a relationship that DOES exist?

There's a guy, Cantor, who calls Absolute Infinity God.
Which reminds me of Monty Python's the meaning of life: "Oooh, God, you are SO big!" For the record, I'm 6'1 and weigh 204 lbs. My name in Spanish is Isai.

But let's get down to brass tacks. (lol -what the heck does that mean?) So do numbers exist? They refer to concepts which exist, or to describe properties of groups of objects that exist, but it seems zero and infinity don't exist. Infinity, unless you're measuring space, doesn't exist. And zero...well, maybe it could exist if antimatter wiped out everything in existence or something. That would be the old existential concept of Nothingness. It's theoretical. And then there's One. Possibly the only number that does exist, that simply counts everything as a whole. Does 2 exist? That seems stupid. It takes two, baby. And baby makes three. I'm suddenly into genetics. If you're baby grew up to make three.. Anyway, we perceive separateness, and rightly so. You'd have to be a complete moron not to, right? So numbers seem to exist. Maybe I'm big enough of a moron to consider everyone an extension of a single source. I like trippy thoughts. "No one is really themselves, anymore" the dead milkmen sing. My grandpa was a milkman. Maybe there's more than one source. Two is the dualistic view. Pantheism seems to be the reality. You don't have to be a God to be a number, though (ha). I bet there's only a limited number of sources. Couldn't tell ya how many. Maybe 7 billion. Or like a few dozen or something. Who knows.

Sorry for going on like this.

Just trying to have a little fun, maybe clarify something in my head. Mental masturbation, if you will. If you write a comment, I won't be so all alone.

Solutions for the World's Biggest Problems

I'm reading the above-titled book, edited by Bjorn Lomborg, that was first published in 2007.

It's subtitled: Costs and Benefits

That's how I made my decision for Gore, in the 2000 election. I made a little 4-square box with pro's and con's for each candidate, and did a little comparison in my head for who I thought was the better candidate. It came out about even, for me, as was the election, but I thought Gore would be more interesting. I almost chose him out of entertainment value. Anyway,

Economic costs and benefits does the mathematical calculus to measure which solutions are the most cost-effective (bigger bang for buck).

Although I stated earlier that I think ALL solutions can, and should, be solved, I think the wefare economics approach of the Copenhagen Consensus is a good starting point, to get the world positive about healing itself.

Everything can seem so dismal.

It seems the UN is awash in problems and pessimism. Institutionally, the principles of the Secret are far from being a corporate culture at the UN, I perceive. I'm guilty, too. Optimism needs to take precedence over cynicism. Humans are problem-solvers. The brain is an organ that best operates when it is seeking a goal and solving a problem. It's encouraging to see the finish line. As I have said before, there is more than enough money (and willpower) to solve every last problem on our planet.

It will take vision and leadership and cooperation (the use of the hive-mind, such as the internet) to make as happy a world as possible. Bjorn Lomborg is one leader, among many. He has recently been employed by the UN to prioritize the world's problems (does he have a staff?), and the Copenhagen Commission is meeting again in 2008 to look in greater depth into prioritizing global solutions.

Despite my philosophical belief that all the problems are inter-related, and should and can be solved together, which puts me at odds with (a possibly too?) pragmatic Mr. Lomborg, I believe his approach is the best starting point.

Economics is largely psychological, and if we start solving the problems we can with immediate results, and with the largest payback, we'll be creating positivity and happiness and momentum and development and cash for more changes to come.

I think we should map out all the inter-relationships between all the world's problems, and pinpoint the spots that would have the greatest ripple effects, in a constantly re-evaluated process of where to keep spending.

Just as free trade allows the greatest creation of wealth, and localization of effort where it belongs, for greatest overall development, psychologically speaking, happiness spreads and ripples outward, too. If abject misery and suffering are reduced/eliminated, the entire world reaps a benefit, in my opinion (in the psychesphere). If all in all is all we are, then we each have a vested interest in making everybody happy, for our own happiness.

Caring for others should be universal, and selfishness should be kept to a minimum. The economic viewpoint that everyone benefits when everyone is out for themselves is off. Corporations are about getting the most money for the people (and stockholders) comprising each corporation. But the world is a unit. The whole world has to be seen as a corporation, of sorts. We're all in this, together. It's a global village, to be somewhat trite. We face common problems. We shouldn't have to rely on something like an alien invasion to unite.

Everyone makes themselves happy to a point, but we are interdependent on each other for survival, and need friends, family, acquaintances, coworkers, clients, classmates, churchgoers, whatever, for our social lives. Some think you should make yourself happy before making others happy. I say making others happy is an essential part of making yourself happy.

Common problems all earthlings face are: survival (I subsume reproduction under survival). Having a family and working together to raise children invests people with a need to care for humanity. Otherwise, the self becomes the center, which just dies, eventually. You're invested in ecology, peace, wealth, happiness, love, and survival of your children. You have a purpose, a goal, an objective, an envisioned future. You want your genes to propagate, to be scientific. You seek reproductive success.

But Bjorn is homosexual. Probably an evolutionary dead-end. His family has become all of humanity. He wants us all to be his children, and be better off. He wants to focus his energies on serving all mankind, instead of just his kid(s). He might have a bit of a messiah complex. That's my take on him.

Plants, pets, and children are most people's practice of nurturing. Work, too, provides goods and services to society at large. I'll contribute to the pool of ideas, if it's any help to anyone.

Besides survival, we all want to not suffer, and beyond simply existing, to enjoy life. We have basic needs: food/water, shelter/clothing, love/companionship, and health, mental and physical.
Mental health includes stimulation, like entertainment, and for some people, medications, perhaps. I think that's it. Companionship and mental health require friendships, probably, too.

Bjorn's list of 23 major problems are:
Economy: 1) Financial instability, 2)Lack of Intellectual Property Rights, 3)Money Laundering, and 4)Subsidies and Trade Barriers.

Environment: 5)Air Pollution, 6)Climate Change, 7)Deforestation, 8)Land Degradation, 9)The Economics of Biodiversity Loss, 10)Vulnerability to natural disasters.

Governance: 11)Arms Proliferation, 12)Conflicts, 13)Corruption, 14)Lack of Education, 15)Terrorism.

Health and Population: 16)Drugs, 17)Disease control, 18)Lack of people of working age, 19)Living conditions of children, 20)Living conditions of women, 21)Hunger and Malnutrition, 22)Unsafe water and lack of sanitation, 23)Population: Migration.

On your own, without the book, how would you rank these?, (if you had to).
I'll write more posts on the book as I read it.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

thoughts of the day

anagrams, labels, wurdz

1. Catholic anagrams:
-'Eucharist' anagrams to 'a cure shit' (among like 970 others)
-'body of christ' anagrams to 'by doctor fish' or 'cost of hybrid' or 'codify throbs' (among over a thousand others).
-'blood of christ' anagrams to 'dolors of bitch' or 'for solid botch' or 'forbids clot oh' or 'blood chi frost' or 'fools birth doc' or 'slob ditch roof' or 'hobo doc flirts' or 'child of robots' or 'cold fish robot' or 'robs ditch fool' or 'so lord of bitch' or 'botch lord of SI' or 'old crib of host.'

2. Once you label me you negate me. -Soren Kierkegaard, philosopher (1813-1855)

-Soren Kierkegaard has: (angered, enraged, grenade, orangeade, karaoke, geek, deranges, agreed, reread, gorier, orgies, darkener, kaiser, kink, reasoner, reading, groaned, randier, soaked, naked, drainers, snakier, roarings, eek, adorer, ogre, ergo, gore, erased, endorser, serener, dragon, skier, ignore, greener, region, kids, earring) in his name. lol.

3. UB40 is only 30 (It was formed in 1978. It still has all 8 original members). T comes b4 U, though. U2 is you, too. Om. Other U2's are the Lockheed american spyplane, a german submarine, a soviet biplane, the umbrella cockatoo, and a cardiovascular peptide. Be good, U2.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Priorities for captives

Family, Freedom (not Farc)

Farc
Columbian rebels are thought to be holding about 750 prisoners; Here's the experience of 3 recently freed Americans, who had to endure cruelties such as sleeping both in boxes and with chains around their necks all the time, including while they were sleeping, secured to a tree...:

Freedom
-Gonsalves also held small wooden chess pawns he had carved out of wood using a broken piece of a machete. It took three months to make them, he said. Watch Gonsalves talk about how chess made him feel free "We're in chains, sitting Indian-style on a piece of plastic, just playing chess," Stansell said. "And when you're doing that, you're free."

Family
-He said, "When you're in our situation, we realize what's important. We know. The three of us know better than any of you guys out there, it's the family. And I'd like everyone to listen very closely to that."

Chess is freedom. I knew a player who said, "Chess is war". So war is freedom.
Hmm.

A bit o' physics

Quantum Entanglement, Time Travel, Teleportation, Antimatter, and Singularity!

Physics is fun. Stuff like going faster than light, and data time travel.

1.Einstein famously derided entanglement as "spukhafte Fernwirkung" or "spooky action at a distance." In fact, it was his belief that future mathematicians would, in fact, discover that quantum entanglement actually entailed nothing more or less than an error in their calculations. As he once wrote: "I find the idea quite intolerable that an electron exposed to radiation should choose of its own free will, not only its moment to jump off, but also its direction. In that case, I would rather be a cobbler, or even an employee in a gaming house, than a physicist.”

I wonder why.
Maybe he should have. Experiments support it.
(I hate nukes)

2.I was in San Francisco with my dad in his car, when we heard a report on the radio that talked about how physicists had succeeded in sending a laser beam faster than the speed of light through a certain medium; I think it was a prism. Thus, they had achieved time travel, and the laser I think came out before they turned it on, or something. That was my impression, anyway. I was much more impressed with the report than my dad.

So maybe I'm the father of Jesus? The letters of my name are certainly entangled, it seems. I actually don't know. I'd like to say I'm just playin'. By father, I mean source, or maybe the guy in his head, like David (Eldridge) is in mind. You know, like how vampires sire or something, but in a good way.

I know, I'm crazy.
(I hope at least you're enjoying reading this)
Scientology is the science of mind, they say. They seem to understand mind control.
But do they understand dreams?

Anyway, I'm not so sure time acts as unidirectionally as everyone thinks it does. Expected death, for example changes our behavior. Likewise, anticipated anything usually causes a response. If you anticipate immortality, you might be inclined to act according to the criteria that define the anticipated characteristics of that immortality. Anticipated heaven, hell, or oblivion each have their effects. Just a thought. I'm inclined to believe in a clockwork universe, unfolding deterministically, though. You do what you gotta do. Freedom? Feel free to believe in freedom.

3. Teleportation is already here; link

quantum internet
A Quantum Internet of the future, as I envision it, would have everything entangled, maybe, and instantaneous feeding of the information you want, directly to your brain, or a device, your choice. Is everything already entangled? If not, what would that be like? Would we need to impose a form on the content? A kind of omniscience, that clearly organizes all information, tailored to each person's learning style? Will astrology ever be obsolete?

levels
How many levels of reality are there? In pods, with everybody dreaming, like in the Matrix movies? Self-generated dreams and externally fed dreams? Communal dream-realities, and individual realities. In the womb? Waking dreams, dreaming you're awake, enlightenment, disillusionment, in the present, reliving the past, imagining the future, emotions (happy disillusionment?)...Live them all, no? Experience the full range of life. Have the ability to choose what and for how long, with the ability to return to past conditions, from the infinitely varied experiences in reality. Be a centipede. Be a unicorn. Anything. Design it yourself. The future could be totally fun. Like "heaven."

There are levels of deception, too. People will have false-consciousness, and live delusional lives, and/or maybe spend their life in a virtual world, without ever seeing the real one.

They say we need our lies. Maybe the person who said that hasn't seen the whole truth? If it's that horrible, you can always erase your memory, and start over again. You see what you're looking for? What a world.

I want to travel.

4. Antimatter is a pretty weird thing, too. Apparently, if a particle and antiparticle collide, they both disappear, poof, into...what, nihility? Apparently, stuff is just popping into and out of existence all the time. Like socks, for example. Reality is a froth of quantum foam or something.

5. Truth told, I don't know what singularity is. I know what Singulair is. Singularity I suppose is when somebody becomes information central. Like if I become even more Godly, and everything is quantum entangled through me or something. Dunno. Just guessing. Right now, there's just gods everywhere running willy nilly and reality is a madness of bumpings and clashings. Lol.

Sadhu: Indian holy man



A sadhu, or Hindu holy man, emerges from a swim in the River Ganges near Allahabad, India.
In Hinduism, sadhu is a common term for an ascetic or practitioner of yoga (yogi) who has given up pursuit of the first three Hindu goals of life: kama (enjoyment), artha (practical objectives) and even dharma (duty). The sadhu is solely dedicated to achieving moksha (liberation) through meditation and contemplation of God. Sadhus often wear ochre-colored clothing, symbolizing renunciation.

'Sādhu!' is also a Sanskrit term used as an exclamation for something novel.
I love this pic. Check out that water..

Jesus Christ!

Here is an excerpt from Wikipedia's "Immortality":

Disease is theoretically surmountable via technology. Human understanding of genetics is leading to cures and treatments of a myriad of previously incurable diseases. The mechanisms by which other diseases do their damage are becoming better understood. Sophisticated methods of detecting diseases early are being developed. Preventative medicine is becoming better understood. Neurodegenerative diseases like Parkinson's and Alzheimer's may soon be curable with the use of stem cells. Breakthroughs in cell biology and telomere research are leading to treatments for cancer. Vaccines are being researched for AIDS and tuberculosis. Genes associated with type 1 diabetes and certain types of cancer have been discovered allowing for new therapies to be developed. Artificial devices attached directly to the nervous system may restore sight to the blind. Drugs are being developed to treat myriad other diseases and ailments.

There is hope! And not just in Arkansas.
(Plus, there's the mighty power of the mind)

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

True Reality


Religion makes things, through repetition, "really real"
God is defined as "ultimate reality"
Is ultimate reality a lie?
Truth is objective, eternal, and absolute, some say.
"I am" is true. It won't be eternal, though. Or will it?
A few takes on True Reality:

1.A song called True Reality by Motiv

I don't know what else to say but you can't keep living life this way
a bag a day keeps the pain away for a while until it is too late
you think you've got it in control but your brain is too enslaved
to tell you're stuck inside your world and you still refuse to see
your life wasting away
and now it's time to get a grip and realize the true reality
you jab the vein in your arm you kill yourself and disregard
the fact that it will end and your precious heroin
then you'll finally realize that it was all just a waste of your time
your life wasted away and now you've finally seen the truth
and realized the true reality

-"Heroin, it's my life, and it's my wife" -Velvet Underground

2. Poem, from website "Is the Real World Really Real?"
-Is reality real? Such confusion!Can it be that it's all just illusion?
Philosophers cogitate;Scientists speculate.
But none of them reach a conclusion

Is reality real...Is that not the stupidest question you've ever heard?
Then again, I think like a lawyer, I think (I'm not, though).
Reality, by definition, is real. It's a tautology.
There is no such thing as unreal reality.
We just have to be clear. For example,
When I hear a "voice", it's real in my head.
If you say it's not real, you're the one who's insane.
If something is not real, it's not a part of reality. (duh)
So flying unicorns are not real, but the concept of them is.

(although I admit the possibility of imaginative concepts having reality outside of our experience, like elsewhere in the universe or in another universe...It is also possible that it is not possible to conceive of something that is unreal, so all the fiction in the libraries or on screen is actually real somewhere, including all the horror, which is a scary thought). The truth is, none of us know all of reality, nor ever will. Space is too vast, the possibilities too endless. But I suppose one of those possibilities is omniscience. I would imagine that to be space itself having consciousness.

We sing "row, row, row your boat...life is but a dream". So life is just dreams within dreams? God is our dream, and we are God's dream. I have a dream. Some day, we will all live out our own dreams. Lol. If most of space is empty, and matter is just energy and light, then yeah, reality is pretty dreamy, I guess. It may even be that reality is less solid than my dreams. Like consciousness scattered to the winds, rather than organized (if however crazily) in my brain.

3. German physicist Max Born said, "We believe in natural laws and rely on their validity in everyday life. But we human beings are part of nature and subject to her laws. Therefore what we do should be just as predetermined as any natural process. But we regard ourselves as creatures capable of forming opinions and of acting on the basis of free decisions; we therefore pass judgment on human actions, calling them good or bad, just or unjust. How can we do so if every human action is nothing but part of a predetermined , automatic process? The contradiction seems insoluble. Only two possibilities seem to exist: either one must believe in determinism and regard freewill as a subjective illusion, or one must become a mystic and regard the discovery of natural laws as a meaningless intellectual game" (Born, 1968).

I'm not sure he's got that right. The italics are my emphasis, as something I see as solid. Can't you be a mystic under determinism? I don't see why any natural law we come up with would only be rendered meaningless in a deterministic universe. Couldn't a deterministic universe give at least one person free-will? Okay, I'll think about this tomorrow. I'm tired, and confused.

4. Leibniz wrote; Reality cannot be found except in One single source, because of the interconnection of all things with one another.

- This interconnection is quantum entanglement? Am I connected to something I've never seen, thought about, or been close to? If so, what is the nature of this connection? I'm not completely clear on the concept. My understanding of it goes from electrons to telepathy to maybe people thinking the same thoughts to maybe even gravity (it acts instantaneously). My being God, of course, entangles me with everything. But if I were bad, I wouldn't be God (One). I'd be disconnected from (some of) reality. Argh.

I might be out of my depth. Reality is surely a complex topic. Quantum this and that, and all. I had a dream last night that showed this endless equation. That might have been invaluable to science, if I had a photographic memory. Sorry, fellas. Then again, it had the words God and Reality in it, which doesn't seem to rightly belong in an equation.

Trippy Crazy Weirdness

You have a chance of beating the computer...

Be amazed!; LINK

I think the solution lies in a subconscious coding of time (it's numbers?). Relative to the moment of blinking (as well?). Dunno, though. If I did, I'd be even more Godly, spose. (Sara figured it out. I'm a dumbo. it's pretty simple, actually)

Something to think about in relation to Fate, and Telepathy/Mind Reading.

The guy who runs the site has an interesting blog on all things God: godlorica.

John Lennon: "Imagine" "God"

He wrote two songs whose lyrics I'll post here: 1) Imagine. 2)God.
Put them together, yourself!

Imagine

Imagine there's no heavenIt's easy if you tryNo hell below usAbove us only skyImagine all the peopleLiving for today...Imagine there's no countriesIt isn't hard to doNothing to kill or die forAnd no religion tooImagine all the peopleLiving life in peace...You may say I'm a dreamerBut I'm not the only oneI hope someday you'll join usAnd the world will be as oneImagine no possessionsI wonder if you canNo need for greed or hungerA brotherhood of manImagine all the peopleSharing all the world...You may say I'm a dreamerBut I'm not the only oneI hope someday you'll join usAnd the world will live as one

God
God is a conceptBy which we measureOur painI'll say it againGod is a conceptBy which we measureOur pain I don't believe in magicI don't believe in I-chingI don't believe in BibleI don't believe in tarotI don't believe in HitlerI don't believe in JesusI don't believe in KennedyI don't believe in BuddhaI don't believe in MantraI don't believe in GitaI don't believe in YogaI don't believe in kingsI don't believe in ElvisI don't believe in ZimmermanI don't believe in BeatlesI just believe in meYoko and meAnd that's reality The dream is overWhat can I say?The dream is overYesterdayI was the DreamweaverBut now I'm rebornI was the WalrusBut now I'm JohnAnd so dear friendsYou'll just have to carry onThe dream is over.

Sara and Me. That's Reality. Thx, John, for the goodness (you can see the videos on u-tube).

I am God

1.I am what I eat. I eat God. (PC&J)
God is love. I eat love. Peas and chocolate contain love. I eat peas and chocolate.
I also eat the Eucharist. They say Jesus is God. And the Eucharist is Jesus.
I am God.

2.I am what I am. (I yam what I yam -Popeye)
I am good. Only God is good.
Thus, I am God.

3.God is One.
I am an individual. I am only one person. I am One.
Thus, I am God.

4.God is a man of war. The art of war is deception. I lie.
I am God.


5.God is love. I love. I am love.
I am God.

6.God is in heaven. I am on earth. The earth is in the heavens.
Heaven is also a state of happiness. I am happy.
I am the source of my happiness.
I am God.

7.God is a word. And the word was God. His name is I AM.
So, Duh.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

The Delusion of Self is Self-Delusion

Huh? You might be thinking.

If you think the self does not exist, you're delusional (I believe). If you think you don't exist, but only God does (His name is I AM, after all), you're probably as crazy as Jesus. Of course, you have the right to believe this. You might get crucified, though. People will forever mutter your name in dismay, as well. (This picture is from 1936, of the "brown lady", a ghost). What was this ghost, and is it a 'self'? Bizarre. Anyway,

"After all" sounds like an eschatological term, if ever I heard one.

If God is a man of war, and vengeance is mine, sayeth the lord, then Being God might be subject to "Live by the Sword, Die by the Sword", and "Judge not lest ye be judged." So God is a concept of: perfection that cannot be killed, even as a judge. Maybe God doesn't judge. He's just the reaper, and everyone dies. He's God the father, father time, which stands for that is me. Time takes it's toll, and for whom does the bell toll, it tolls for thee. God is eternal and omnipresent, they say. I alter this conception a bit. If the human lifespan has a limit of, say, 130 years, then I will be dead, at the latest, by around 2100. Love never dies. That's from Dracula. Anyway. The world will no doubt be significantly different by then. Swarming with oodles of Gods with more omniscience than you can shake a stick at. I'm sure some significant events will no doubt transpire in my lifetime, too. Hopefully, all good, right? If you're reading this blog, you're one of the privileged few :-) Be a history maker!

Anyway, some forms of self-delusion are projection, delusional projection, displacement, denial, fantasy, and projection.

I picked this up from Dr. Sanity's blog.

He says:
These days, whenever something goofy turns up on the news, chances are it involves a fellow called Mohammed. A plane flies into the World Trade Centre? Mohammed Atta. A gunman shoots up the El Al counter at Los Angeles airport? Hesham Mohamed Hedayet. A sniper starts killing petrol station customers around Washington, DC? John Allen Muhammed. A guy fatally stabs a Dutch movie director? Mohammed Bouyeri. A terrorist slaughters dozens in Bali? Noordin Mohamed. A gang-rapist in Sydney? Mohammed Skaf.

Maybe because religious figures attempt to convert the violent impulse to good? It's a bit much to have in your name, perhaps. Mohammed was violent, they say, despite Allah the Merciful. I suspect Jesus was a stone cold killer. In one apocryphal book, he kills as a kid. He shrivels a fig tree. He overturns the moneychangers tables in the temple. He transfers some unclean spirits to pigs, who commit suicide. He caught a buttload of fish. That's all the violence I can think of. Maybe he killed germs. Whatever, though.

Everything is God

The Jesuits have a goal of seeing God in all things.
or, "It's all good, dawg"

The webpage of the online Spiritual Exercises also says "that it is God who truly directs. The Directors help you discover how to pray best, how God prays in you, and where God is leading you."

Prays in you. That's a trip.

Apparently, no one has an identity.

The only way to see God IN all things, is if God IS all things, right? If everything's God, and God isn't you, and even your prayers to God come FROM God, then you are nothing, an illusion, you don't exist, your thoughts aren't your own, you are a vehicle, a vessel, a part of God, and...here it is...God Himself. You're a part of reality. You're a part of His body, like a finger.

It seems to me like hypnosis to make you think of yourself as "good," so you will live a good life, and do good things.

I'm not going to go through these exercises to come right back to where I started.

I exist. Happiness is good. If it makes you happy, it's moral. And the most moral should make you the happiest. If we are God's children, we'd be built that way, no? Reality unfolds as it will. Playing God and Being God makes me happy. Maybe the reason I feel headshocks and voices all the time is because all these psychic vampires are draining me dry. The Christian answer is to fill your tank weekly -refill- and eat and drink the Eucharist. The Eucharist stands for Jesus which stands for God which stands for reality. Mm, truth! Perhaps I should start consuming people. I mean, did Jesus? Is cannibalism Christ-like? Is Jesus my saviour, too? He seemed to think there was torment for those "who don't believe in his name," whatever that means. If you say his name, is that supposed to be a powerful spell? Jesus. Maybe I should eat the Body of Christ? I eat cannibals? I've thought t0he Eucharist might be a ritualistic consumption of the other folks attending the Mass, or the entire body of the Catholic church, for all the reasons you probably disagree with them in so many ways. I don't know if there is a subconscious subtext to eating in general, and I don't care. I just want good food. I know things taste better if other people are hungry for them. Torture tastes good. I'm not going to eat anyone. I'm not that crazy, and I don't have a death-wish. But I do, if the alternative is an eternal life of suffering. I believe Oingo Boingo over Jesus (nobody lives forever). This God role thing started long after my schizophrenia, by the way. But I've always felt smarter than the average bear. Albert Fish said the tastiest thing he had ever eaten was a child's rump roast. It made him happy. What a world.

God's in that, too, I suppose.

It's all good!
Okay, maybe morality deserves some thought, like universal happiness requires restricting some individual happinesses, and some serious psychology/brainwashing/education, about civilized living. I'm gonna have to think about that.

St. Ignatius' Spiritual Exercises

I just read Nausea, by Jean Paul Sartre

In it, the Exercises are mentioned.
As a former Ignatian, I would be remiss not to include a link to them.

To merge your life into the life of God, the introductory paragraph states. That's what I'm doing in my own way, I guess. But in making God my identity, I can pretty much do anything, you might think, and that might be bad. Ha. I'll have to do the exercises, and keep that in mind.

I'm going into this, thinking:
Jesus was a nutcase. Then again, I hear a voice in my head, and think I'm sane. Hmm.

This is cool!

"Amazing Sea Creature"

http://www.stupidvideos.us/search.aspx/search~amazing%20sea%20creature

Does anybody (or science, for that matter) know what kind of (animal, I assume) this is?

Sunday, July 6, 2008

alpha and omega

Quotes from Wikipedia on cause and death of God:

"In traditional Western theism, God cannot be created by any other force or being, therefore God is either self-caused (causa sui) or uncaused."

from the meaning of life page:
"...And others have considered the human need for some higher or supernatural ideal, for instance, in reference to Friedrich Nietzsche's postulation of the "death" of God, Martin Heidegger puts the problem as "If God as the suprasensory ground and goal of all reality is dead, if the suprasensory world of the Ideas has suffered the loss of its obligatory and above it its vitalizing and upbuilding power, then nothing more remains to which man can cling and by which he can orient himself."

What is God? What is death? I'm God. Are you? Death is "the cessation of the biological functions that define living organisms. It refers both to a specific event and, particularly in humans, to a condition the true nature of which it has for millennia been a central concern of the world's religious traditions to penetrate."

If God is dead, wouldn't he go to heaven, lol?

Friday, July 4, 2008

Reality

Reality: Objective and Subjective
i.e., Reality and "reality"
i.e. outside your head, inside your head
That makes sense.
But that's Consensus Reality

Maybe separateness is imposed. Two people, for instance. Minds mingle. Vibes, energy, interaction with people around you. "Feeling" people look at you. Matter is energy. Maybe energy is the only reality.

Am I a creature made of light? Perhaps we all are.

Does everything, all matter, all energy, have consciousness?

If everything has a head, so to speak, then each atom is a living being, each electron, each quark, down to the smallest particle. And likewise, up to the biggest entity, all of reality, the universe, or universes, possibly ad infinitum, what we call "God." The entire universe could be like a quark in another universe. It could be totally crazy, that way. The only way to make sense of it, is to collapse separateness, and call everything God. I am you as you are me as we are all together. I am the walrus. Yeehaw! Of course, I'm just Jesse. Consensus Reality comes crashing back in.

So just as each atom in my body is a part of me, I am a part of humanity, which is a part of animalia, a part of earth. Gaia is the term for the living, conscious earth. Likewise, the entire universe could be a type of organism. We could be the bacteria in the stomach of the universe. Instead of saying God, we could say "The universe will help me" or "I can't believe the universe would let that happen." (Question: Why do they call universities that?).

Anyway, back to Objective and Subjective. Either way,
it's physical, like a rock, or in the realm of physics, like light or radiowaves and microwaves, etc.
Subjective- mind, imagination, thoughts, concepts, ideas, beliefs, worldviews -psychology
Objective-physics, chemistry, and biology. matter and chemicals.
I think physics has somewhat collapsed the distinction.

Spirit and soul and "vibes" and mind, are all biological/part of the brain/in the realm of science, like waves or any other form of connection. Our bodies are vehicles for dna between our parents and our children.

Just like the pbs show sang: Contact, is the reason, is the answer, why everything happens.

God, from Encarta encyclopedia:
God: the center and focus of religious faith, a holy being or ultimate reality to whom worship and prayer are addressed. Especially in monotheistic religions, God is considered the creator or source of everything that exists and is spoken of in terms of perfect attributes—for instance, infinitude, immutability, eternity, goodness, knowledge (omniscience), and power (omnipotence). Most religions traditionally ascribe to God certain human characteristics that can be understood either literally or metaphorically, such as will, love, anger, and forgiveness.

If God is the ultimate reality, what am I saying when I say I am God? Am I saying I am the ultimate reality? Well, no, possibly or probably not for you, but to me I am. Of course, if you are reading this sentence right now I am your ultimate reality. The mind is a trip. Actually, I'm only my ultimate reality in a sense. I want to say I am my ultimate reality, but I often perceive reality as coming from a source other than myself. It's an interaction between myself and the outside world. I am like a robot. I see reality according to my train of thought, my preconceptions, my time. Occasionally, I feel free. Upon reflection, I imagine I'm not, really. Reality is Other than me, in the sense that Reality will in all likelihood continue to exist without me. And other than me, in the sense that there seems to be someone that's in my head all the time, knows my thoughts, and forms conversation to and around me according to what's been on my mind, usually of late. The vampire metaphor works well as a paradigm for this phenomenon. The matrix is another way of thinking about it, as if computers were forming reality. The Truth is a matter of conjecture. Anyway, I can choose to give others precedence over myself, making others more important than me, or more central than me, or more of an ultimate reality than me, but when it comes down to it, I will still be in my own mind, and perceiving through my own body. I am the center of my own universe. We all are. It's probably healthier to externalize to "God" or some other conceived "source" the nature of ultimate reality, though. But what's God's source, then?

So, Ultimate Reality aside, I feel happy to ascribe the Godly qualities of holiness and perfection to myself. If the dalai lama can be holy, then so can I. I am a good person, and I have been known to spread joy and wisdom. If only God is good, well then I'm God. I'd say there's a lot of other God, too. Perfection, of course, is better than just good. A perfect being makes no mistakes, is free of error, does everything well, nay, perfectly. I try my best. I figure the usual conception of God can do no better. Either God created the devil, who created everything bad, or God himself is responsible for things like chronic pain that drives good people to suicide. The mysterious and nebulous God in heaven has been depicted on the cistine chapel, in the Matrix movie, and in cartoons, for starters. God means a lot of things to a lot of people. I've had a conception of God as the alpha being of humanity, dreaming up the future and programming us all every night in our dreams, or programming computers to program us, etc. I like to think about weird stuff like this. God is generally thought to not make mistakes. But mistakes are a subjective thing, and maybe the "worst" mistake might turn out to be the best thing that ever happened. Like an unintended child. Truth be told, none of us know what perfection is. They even say the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Jesus said we know not what we do. I don't think Jesus knew himself what he was doing. If perfection is good, is it still bad to be perfectly evil? Good and evil need each other. Any act can be interpreted to be either. So ultimate reality is subjective nonsense, and there is only Personal Reality and Consensus Reality. Be good.

-God
Perhaps you think there is a word/concept that encapsulates reality, like Death or Love?

"The Last Psychiatrist", on (an aspect of) reality.

I want to what?

Apparently, I want to "immanentize the eschaton"

While looking at Playing God, God complex, Messiah complex, delusion of grandeur, and messianism, adventist ...on Wikipedia, I came across this phrase.

I think that just means I want to create a heaven on earth. I admit it. I'm an idealist. Married to a pragmatist. These two sides of me think it is possible to create a happy world. The kingdom, if you will. Not like the JW's envision it, with all animals in harmony. I imagine an alligator will always try to eat you, if hungry. But I believe in a humanity of the future that doesn't have militaries or wars, and all conflict is interpersonal, not intersocietal, which can be solved non-lethally. Basically, I think it's not a hard concept to grasp that we all are similar and want to live healthy, happy lives. Everyone can learn about and overcome the false consciousness of us-them categories, and stop feeling superior, based on nationality, race, religion, sex, or whatever. Racism and nationalism and sexism, etc just seem passe to me. Kurt Cobain sang all in all is all we are, the Dead Milkmen sing Now Everybody's Me, the Beatles sang I am the Walrus, Pink Floyd sings us and them, and for me, all this mind control has sunk in. Not many people are alligators. If everybody is paired up with someone they can truly love, then problems naturally work themselves out. When people start to care for one another, happiness ensues. Everybody can care for everyone. And happiness is heaven. This would be heaven on earth.

I don't believe in souls. I don't believe in afterlives, as I have said. So, in this respect, I don't believe in heaven. The heavens is space, so earth is already in heaven. If we want to create a "heavenly" world, we don't have to just endure continuous unpleasantness on earth and follow some religious prescription for bliss in the hereafter; we can work toward achieving concrete goals that reduce suffering and increase happiness, now. Action is the cure to misery.

Catholic Christianity
The Catechism of the Catholic Church makes an oblique reference to the desire to "Immanentize the Eschaton" in article 676:

The Antichrist's deception already begins to take shape in the world every time the claim is made to realize within history that messianic hope which can only be realized beyond history through the eschatological judgment. The Church has rejected even modified forms of this falsification of the kingdom to come under the name of millenarianism, especially the "intrinsically perverse" political form of a secular messianism.

-Eschatology is the study of final events in the history of the world, the ultimate destiny of humanity (How do you study the future? Surmising and conjecture, no?)
-Millenarianism is the belief in a coming major transformation of society after which all things will be changed in a positive (or sometimes negative or ambiguous) direction. Al-Quaeda, Mormons, JW's, and Rastafarians are millenarianists.
-Messianism is belief in a saviour, or world-hero, for example (if not just the hero of a group). Christianity derives from the greek, meaning a follower of Messiah.

Beyond history?? After everyone is dead? Is that what the Catholic church wants us to be hopeful about? After humanity is extinct?

I thought Catholics believed their dead went to heaven when they died (if they were good, of course). It seems the messianic hope (the kingdom of heaven) can only be realized after EVERYBODY's dead, in the future.

Nuts.

So does my idealism make me The Antichrist? Geez.
1 John chapter 2 refers to many antichrists present at the time while warning of one Antichrist that is coming. The "many antichrists" belong to the same spirit as that of the one Antichrist. John wrote that such antichrists deny "that Jesus is the Christ", "the Father and the Son", and would "not confess Jesus came in the flesh." Likewise, the one Antichrist denies the Father and the Son.

Christ just means annointed with oil. I'm not denying Jesus may have been annointed.
Jesus was human. He had a father. He was a Son. I'm not denying that, either.
I'm sure Jesus must have existed. That would have been quite a doozy if some alien generated a crazy illusion or something. Came in the flesh? You mean, orgasm? Dunno. Don't care.

Presto. I'm not (The) Antichrist.