The good book says only God is good, so it seems to me somebody needs to step up.
I hope you enjoy reading this, the Jesse Journal, as much as I have enjoyed writing it. Please feel free to subscribe, write me an email, request that I write about any particular topic you may want my perspective on, send a prayer, click on the charity link, or donate money to my bicycle fund! Have fun!
Your pal, Jess Ladies- I'm a single, straight, virgo/boar INTJ (age 45) who enjoys books, getting out into nature, music, and daily exercise.
Here's a quote from Fyodor Dostoevsky to start things off right: Love the animals, love the plants, love everything. If you love everything, you will perceive the divine mystery in things. Once you perceive it, you will begin to comprehend it better every day. And you will come at last to love the whole world with an all-embracing love.
hypnosis and economics:
all we ever do is move things around (ideas, things, people)(and dogs!)
we are things, animals, tubes* - solving problems
(such as survive and reproduce, to pass on our genes)
think, say, do and be - good, better, and best!
perfection and purity, in possibility and potential
contentment, satisfaction, joy, comfort, bliss
peace, prosperity, safety, security, friendship, family
health, wellness, strength, fitness, sanity; loving, loved, in love
goodness, virtue, honesty, wisdom, probity, uprightness
respect, compassion, principled, moral, ethical, kind, giving
joy, happiness, cheer, laughter, fun, games, play, sing, dance, clap, shout, feel fine
pleasure, endorphins, look good and feel good, variety (not boredom)
exertion, exercise, sweat, muscle-confusion; challenge, opportunity
blessing; God bless you!
(sneeze) ah-choo! (choo-choo. chews. choose. chuy.)
good, right, honorable, virtuous, true, honest, trustworthy,
sacred, holy, joyful, grateful, beneficent loving-kindness.
merciful, forgiving, compassionate, wise:
+ positive, praise and gratitude
goal, objective, desire (god): desire, destination, destiny
to minimize suffering and evil, and maximize joy and love!
ameliorate v. exacerbate. to be a part of the solution, not a problem
cultivate virtue and extinguish vice (god's cv)
betterment, improvement, change (bic lighter)
utopia, the "kindgdom," heaven: happy/healthy!
this life or the next, here or hereafter, now or never
progress process, the development dialectic
(thesis, antithesis, synthesis)
all in your head! heaven is a state of mind.
absence of suffering, presence of bliss
(frivolity, merriment, comedy, for example)
also, heavenly is a ski resort, hell is a village in Norway.
equanimity, activism, simplicity
take things in stride, acceptance, "like water off a duck's back"
courage, bravery, selflessness
vanity, frustration, futility, absurdity, nonsense
awake, aware, alive; clarity, attentive, eloquent
survive, thrive, alive!
victory could be death, incarceration, suicide, or a shift in outlook, conscience, consciousness.
(changing hearts and minds and behavior, repentance and forgiveness and rebirth).
By this, I mean overcoming, not being possessed by ("vampire emotions") of murderous anger, hatred, rage, wrath, fury. You might have to systematically address every one of my 1000 reasons to kill, to get there. Better to address and overcome than avoid, I feel.
*a Cal biology student told me how it was informative to think of humans/animals as basically "tubes" (from mouth to anus). (eat and excrete. ingest and digest). food: healthy and nutritious, vitamins and variety and vegetables, not too much/too little, and delicious!
"Whom the Gods would destroy they first make mad"
-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Mad can mean angry, and it can also mean insane.
Or, insanely angry. ('insane' can also be an intensifier)
(1 of the 4)
Everybody is destroyed, eventually. Time destroys all.
No one is immortal. Nobody lives forever. Death is the universal fate.
hence, if Longfellow is to be believed, we are all mad (at some time or another).
mad is synonymous with crazy, insane, psychotic, nuts, schizophrenic.
i think the Brits call it "going mental"
insanity is a legal category: "legally insane"
mad crazy insane:
1.mci (microwave communications, inc., from '63-'98)
(are schizophrenic voices a type of "vibe"?, e.g. a microwave?)
if you "are on the same wavelength," what does that mean, in physics?
2."slip you a mickey" -to give someone a laced drink, with the intent to incapacitate.
my voice has made a distinction between insane and unsane.
which can be a bit maddening, as unsane is not a word!
in the sane? united nations sanity?
is anger somehow an insane response?
since we are what we eat, should we avoid nuts?
are skittles or campfire skits related to being schizo?
if a Cray computer sleeps, is it cray-z? Or a crayfish?
is God responsible for our mental health?
is madness a curse? is sanity a blessing?
does it originate from a Higher Power?
To vanquish madness, cultivate sanity, and achieve wellness
one must realize the source or origin or cause of insanity.
maybe it's a delusional doctor, psychiatrist? a false diagnosis?
maybe it's genetic, from your mom, dad, or both?
maybe it's a telepath, in your head
maybe it's your subconscious, or the "collective unconscious"
is life merrily but a dream? from Morpheus, the god of dreams?
can one dream oneself into sanity?
force oneself to wake up from the nightmare?
what is sanity? what is madness?
the definition of legal insanity is mental illness of such a severe nature that a person cannot distinguish fantasy from reality, cannot conduct his/her affairs due to psychosis, or is subject to uncontrollable impulsive behavior.
Einstein, of course, said "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."
Sanity is 1. The ability to think and behave in a normal and rational manner; sound mental health
2. reasonable and rational behavior.
Eating Riesens (yum!) as rations, would seem to have little to do with it. Is "sound" mental health related to noises, out loud, talking, verbalizing, thinking out loud? Is a "sound" thought process one in which you (although discouraged when learning speed-reading), "sub-vocalize"?? I suspect it has little or nothing to do with any of this. Although, maybe God can only hear your thoughts if you (sub) vocalize them.
The key word is "Normal." Average has rage in it. The mean is, of course, mean. Normal has moral in it. plus N. And Norm, and Al. and Mal, like malevolent or malicious.
Norm, from Cheers, and Al, from the Daily Show (Madrigal). There's a lot to be mad about. But laughter is the best medicine, not eating someone's liver with fava beans and a nice chianti, lol. (High tyramine foods, to be avoided if you're taking MAOI's, monoamine oxidase inhibitors) Morality does engender righteous indignation, though, at the Amoral/Immoral.
a bit on hats (!):
Hatred, red hat, (Trump it), hated=death, mad hatter, mad-mom and dad, hat- hunger and thirst (for righteousness), happy/humor/healthy and torture/torment. "Moderation in all things, including moderation" -Oscar Wilde
politics and vampires
poly-ticks (many blood-suckers), vampire (ima perv, blood fetish, engorgement), blood: be lewd. You suck. Getting drunk. G-D. Drinking from the well. (the well?!) Is the normal not moral? The banality of evil (-Hannah Arendt) (be anal?). "Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac" -Henry Kissinger.
God and free will
A God, knowing all, therefore has no free will of His own, because He knows the best course of action, and are "all-good," so must therefore always go that path. I got that from the character Penny, in the Magician series, by Lev Grossman. (although, perhaps, a God might occasionally encounter a choice between two or more equally meritorious options).
I mean, really: Jesus, if he ate meat,
was more evil than Hitler, who was a vegetarian. Nobody knows, for a fact. But the argument can be made.
Nobody's perfect, I guess. Even God.
Only God is good? There is no God. To make God real, you have to become Him. It's a form, a concept, a role. And
there's no such thing as perfection. Thou shalt not kill? Try not
eating. Even vegetarians kill plants. The price of sin is death,
they say. Nobody lives forever. Or is it the “wages” of sin.
Paid in death. Make a killing, get stinking rich, kill 'em all
(healthy: thy hell!). Murder, mr. dr. So that's what
education tells us. Get an edge on life. Grow up and become a doctor. A medical
professional. A professor. Make red to make green. Bloody hell.
Nature is red in tooth and claw. Human nature is, if you believe the
priests, vampirism and cannibalism; you are what you eat, so we eat
and drink God. God is good. Finger lickin' good.
The fact is, do whatever you want
before you die: we're all destined for oblivion. Nothing matters. There's evil, and there's less evil. But no one is good.
After all, Hitler was just talking,
freedom of speech, and it's even possible he didn't actually kill anyone, personally (besides himself). And
Hitler was kind to animals, while the SAD (standard american diet)
gorges itself on dead animal flesh, the painful sacrifice to
unending, unendurable human aggravation, the cause of vast suffering
to cows, pigs, chickens, fish...
What about whales? Eating zillions of
krill. Alive, no less. That's an atrocity, as normal as breathing,
you don't see Greenpeace with save the krill signs. (the blue whale can eat up to 40 million krill/day!)
Morality is a joke. Everybody is a
piece of shit. Mother Theresa thought suffering was a gift from God.
The pope, a Jesuit (who try to see God in all things), would
therefore logically see sadistic torture as Godly. I remember a high
school preacher going on about the “redemptive value of suffering.”
This is nuts. Fuck you, world. Well, not everybody. But it sure seems like it, sometimes.
The world is mad. And they make metake medications. Ugh. Of course, I have the clarity to write this now, while on olanzapine and risperidone. I wonder what would I be writing, off? So anyway, when victims' families declare their desire for the guilty to "burn in hell"... that's kind of a joke, too. In reality, that's just hoping the perp will forget to use sunscreen in Norway (!)
For the sake of argument, I want to say schizophrenics are the only truly sane.
That voice in your head? It's not God, an angel, spirits of the
dead, your conscience, your subconscious, or even necessarily who it
sounds like: it's just a dick, a sadistic fuck who enjoys bothering
you. Everybody is the devil. Because that's what life is, a game
of aggravation. Life's a bitch, and then you die. Schizos are 8x
more likely to commit suicide. 40% attempt, and 5-13% succeed.
There's no escape. At least I'm telling you the truth. There's
virtue in that, I guess. Now go enjoy that hamburger.
healthy: thy hell
sick: smart intelligent caring kind
ill, or cbs: in love w/ life, or consumed by spite
mad: misery anguish despair, mom and dad
pain: pa in (god: get out, dad)
past: pain agony suffering torment
pastor: " oppression repression
lord: life or death, light or dark
jesus: hey Zeus, Jess u
sid: sick ill diseased
sad: sick and diseased, stupid and dumb, sad and depressed,
schizo-affective disorder, social anxiety disorder,
seasonal affective disorder, separation anxiety disorder,
sexual arousal disorder
staph infection: sadism torture agony pain hell
bad: beelzebub and devil
blood: be lewd
vampire: ima perv (you suck)
cannibal: can o' bull
bible: buy bull. horns, horny.
eye teeth (ET), see with your k9s (guide dog: g-d)
seeing eye dog (sed: thirst, in spanish)
g-d: getting drunk
sax and violins: sex and violence
wine, whine, winnie, win E (ecstasy?)
grape: gr rape, gr ape, therapist: the rapist
well: we will, we'll (a "tall drink of water")
host (hostile hostel), wafer (wafer me outside)
eucharist: eu a christ
(ukelele wrist)(hostess cupcakes)
alien: a lien (on your property), a lion (in zion), a lyin' (dog!)
hat: hunger and thirst
food: foo-fighters (alien technology)
consume: con sue me
great: gr eat, gr8
rabbit, presbyterian (bit, byter)
knight, mourning, break fast
fruits, vegetables, nuts
(all 3: an insane brain-dead queer; ur what u eat)
joy dish soap, luvs diapers, kind bars, smart water, harmony snacks
bmw: best man wins
glad: greg liz and declan!
lgbt: liz greg ben teshara
Superman. Superhuman. And not just a super human. He wanted to be the best. The best he could be, superior, excellent, wonderful, perfect. Be all you can be, like the army says. To reach his potential, to use every brain cell, to be at 100%. He wanted to be the best. In every category: the beauty of Arnold, the wealth of Bill, the trivia mastery of Ken, the goodness of Mother Teresa, the combat prowess of Morihei Ueshiba, the genius of Christopher Langan...with the longest lifespan, the most children, the most books written/the most books, read, and the highest level of sustained happiness possible. And power. He wanted God-like power. Not necessarily as President, or even as a Mayor- just the capacity to create the world in his own image, behind-the-scenes, if need be.
But wait! There's more!
Perfection also entails spiritual mastery: The equanimity and bliss of the Buddha, honestly obtained through meditation, reflection, thought, study, discernment; not from a lifetime supply of heroin, for example. A large part of this would be the crushing of madness, and a lifetime of sanity. Loving, loved, in love. To think/say/do/be good/better/best. To be happy, cheerful, joyful, humorous, kind, gentle, grateful, satisfied, content, strong, fit, healthy, well, sane, appreciated, respected, admired, in service, productive, loved, emulated, sought after.
He wanted to unify together all the pieces of the perfection puzzle, to create Himself into an ideal:
Knowledge (educated, informed), wisdom, money, power, beauty, lethality/invulnerability, goodness, perfection, joy, love, longevity, courage, creative-genius: the many facets of an exemplary life, a life well-lived, honest and honorable, virtuous and valued and victorious (over the forces of darkness: ignorance, incuriosity, stupidity, and evil).
This was his goal. A simple goal. He was a simple man.
(Self-realization. To be Himself. To simply be.)
He realized Sanity might not be in the cards (not playing with a full deck?) (you deal with the cards you're dealt) Or, a little madness in the mix could be a necessary component of true sanity. People are cards, characters, forms, roles. But also are unique, with distinctive identities, and true essences, colors, selves, behind the masks/facades/presentation. It's a mad mad world. And you can also choose to have no fixed identity, to be all things, in potential and possibility, playing any required role, when "the world's a stage," with the freedom to be all things to all people, anything to anyone. Is the world predictable, like a computer program/matrix? Or an infinite canvas of interesting individuality? The world may be mad, but hopefully we can keep it from being a threat to itself or others! And, stated positively, we can keep/make the world peaceful, prosperous, and happy/content, filled with truth, beauty, health, love, and respect. Both individually, and as universally as possible: Love thy neighbor, love thyself, love all, serve all, Be Good. A thousand points of light, as they say. Basic needs and comfort for all. Health care as a universal human right. Craving and aversion, positive and negative attachment, eliminated. Know thyself, extinguish resentment, and remember that is better to do nothing at all than to do harm: there can be virtue even in inaction. Don't give evil purchase. Extinguish greed/desire, hatred/malice, ignorance/delusion; Be mindful, and kind. Don't be a dick. Every day is a new beginning. May the force be with you. Be a man for others. Do a good turn daily. Be prepared. Namaste :-)
(Namaste is a sanskrit/hindi respectful greeting: the god in me bows to the god in you.) Maybe sanity has saint in it for a reason. Remember, only God is good, and we're all good; So you ARE God. Well, I am, anyway. I am ______(fill in the blank). Yup, whatever it is, it's God! Unless you put in "not." Although, I suppose that works, too. God is a man of war, and the art of war is deception. So you can say anything about God, He doesn't mind. For example, God is a fiction, fantasy, imaginary. I'm still here! ha. God is a dick? Well, I guess so, actually. And any other body part you care to mention, or Richard, or a shithead/butthead/head-butt, or bastard, born out of wedlock, like me. God is a brain. God is an asshole. God is a fist. God is a pussy. God is a body. God is a corporation. Reality is God. God is everywhere. Evil. Hell. Disrespect. Depression. Stupidity. Death. Madness. Demons and darkness. Scum. Bullies. Depraved criminals. Torture. Lies. Oblivion. Apocalypse. Absurdity. Spite. Resentment. All this blog's incessant babbling. Your comments. It's all good. Even the shit. Cruelty to be kind. Baby ruthless. Praise God. Holy wombat, batman. Nee! As McDonald's says, "I'm lovin' it." Love conquers all, the sadistic fuck.
Why am I saying evil is good? Exploring the logical extension and implications of statements like it's all good and God is everywhere, for starters. Because evil is everywhere, ubiquitous, banal, delicious, and even fun. Because I'm insane. Because one man's evil hell is another's sacred paradise. Because maybe it brings succor to the oppressed, hope in the goodness of the bigger picture, the long arc of history and justice. Because God is great! and vengeance is sweet. Because life is shit, God doesn't exist, and I felt like spewing some philosophical graffiti. Because I hate you. Because I hate myself. Because it's all my fault. Because I'm delusional. Because I'm trying to make sense of the world. Because I am a sinner, and because I am also God Himself, just like you. Because I'm full of shit. Because I like to think, to write, and be right, and find truth, maybe by making some mistakes in the self-apotheotic learning curve. For the hell of it. Because hell is good? Because justice, and vengeance, and love. That sounds about right. Love gets twisted.
The Bible, by Karen Armstrong
Buddha, by Karen Armstrong
Anansi Boys, by Neil Gaiman
American Gods, by Neil Gaiman
Trump Unveiled, by John K. Wilson
The Best American Mystery Stories, 2002, 2004, 1997
Apocalypse Cow, by Michael Logan
The Crossover, by Kwame Alexander (2015 winner)
Crispin: The Cross of Lead, by Avi (2003 winner)
(Criss Cross, by Lynne Rae Perkins, (2006 winner)
is the third newbery book with 'cross' in the title)
The Fountainhead, by Ayn Rand
(borrowed from Sara and Pierre, not the library)
Dragons at Crumbling Castle (and other tales), by Terry Pratchett
(a library discovery! a TP kids' book :-)
My Godfather, Richard Zonca, once told
me, “If I were omnipotent, I would change a lot. If I were
omniscient, I wouldn't change a thing.”
Well, now, at age 45, I have a blog
where I expound my spirited philosophy that I am God, and you are,
too. We all are. And I don't mean we're all one person, in some
spiritual sense, or that everybody's me, or that all in all is all we
are. These are interesting concepts, but I don's subscribe to any
of them. The most powerful person on earth might be God, in a sense,
unless it's a space alien. The smartest person might be God,
although I suspect computers do most of the thinking for us, these
days. Only God is good, and we are all good. The most powerful act
is the act of murder. But there is always a bigger fish. The body of christ is the christian church,
which is a type of corporation. Jesus himself is long dead. We are
all mortal, every one of us, even the psychos who believe they are
vampires. It's an inescapable law of biology. And astronomy. Tick
tock. The sun is getting closer to exploding, one day. Your cells
are replicating. We are all dying. Every day is one day closer to
death. Fetuses are destined for dust. God is all-powerful. We will
all die. Time has our number.
Aside: Time, that is me. Reading this
post is consuming your precious time. Thanks for your time. Time,
Tim E. Christ, Chris T. Lord, life or death. Some shit with the
diamonds, some pearls before swine, or, as they say on the street,
“it's all good.” Meme: me, me. The word Grace has Meaning. mean gr, for example. (manger, german?)
We are animals. We are things. Souls
do not exist, unless by soul, you mean body. We are our bodies, only
our bodies. Mind is seated in the brain. Our brains admit 'vibes'
and 'voices' and dreams, all the time, not just at night. We
inter-penetrate each other. Humanity is a hive-mind. We are
corporate. God can be defined as 'the source.' God is love. We
open our minds to those we love. God loves us. Everyone loves to be
loved, and we should all return the favor. Vanity, all is vanity.
Frustration, futility, absurdity, nonsense. That's actually
Is this hypnosis? Which God is the
Creator, to which God do we owe allegiance? The Father-Son-Holy Spirit? Allah?
Brahma, Shiva, Vishnu, Ganesh, Hanuman? Zeus? Wotan? Thor? Ra?
It doesn't matter. Do whatever makes
you happy. We are all good. There is a law of karma, perhaps. Be
good for goodness' sake. Let time do the killing. There is always
hope. Suicide is always in error. Thou shalt not kill. Love thy
neighbor. Meat is murder. Eat the rich. Go climb a rock.
You are all-powerful in your own "you-niverse", your own domain, with the power to
make yourself happy, to make your world good
to be healthy, wealthy, and wise.
to create good/destroy bad
and love, be loved, be in love
with a little help from your friends!
(such as Ben Franklin, or the Beatles, or me!)
Go forth and multiply, divide and conquer, make a
difference, in the summertime.
Besides immortality in love (whether virtual, or in the real-world)...
(from saving our genetic code, and teleportation, etc.!)
(meeting the right person, going to heaven...)
a more realistic programme-
1.friendship, family, dating, volunteering, a fun job, being social
(and caring for animals; pets!)
2.sexually active; delicious/nutritious (vegetarian?) meals
(good food, and the occasional ben n jerry's)
(home cooked, restaurants, picnics, dinner parties, potluck)
10.lifelong learning, education, teaching, writing, research
discover and go
garage sales, flea markets, thrift stores
arts and crafts; origami, basketry, woodcarving, metalwork,
ceramics, pottery, drawing, painting, watercolors, sculpture
mastery, polymath, scholar-athlete, renaissance man
different jobs, roles, activities, projects
build things (e.g. kit car, fence windmills, a new invention)
start a business
write a book, blog, journal
hiking, camping, getting out into Nature
go horseback riding, trail ride
scuba, snorkel, surf
hot air balloon
hot shower, hot tub
parades, state fairs, festivals
climb a tree. go climb a rock. go fly a kite.
travel, learn languages, experience culture-shock
learn to play an instrument
opera, ballet, theater
go out dancing
stand-up comedy, humor, laughter
play/watch sports (e.g. lawn bowling, horseshoes, pingpong)
play games, videogames
learn martial arts, self-defense, e.g. aikido
spiritually active in diverse communities
achieving personal goals
overcome suffering, achieve bliss
being happy, for any and no reason at all.
finishing reading all my book lists (!)
curious, engaged, disciplined, motivated, dedicated
-success is personal, defined by everyone for themselves (or should be)
-making a "bucket list" isn't a bad idea
-personally, competition and winning aren't my focus.
i see the light!:
-if life is but a dream, you may have to wake yourself up from the nightmare.
-enlightenment is possible, even in darkness
(perhaps even especially in darkness)
-God is much more than a garage door, lol.
-hm, I just noticed 'sanity' has 'saint' in it.
12. Virtue (a component of happiness)
(unless, for you, "happiness is a warm gun")
for me anyway, for example, virtue includes:
you are trustworthy, honest, sincere
(not manipulative, cynical, and post-truthiness)
virtue imparts self-respect.
(i.e. making the world a better place, development)
compassion, mercy, kindness (seeing others as equals)
faith, hope, love ("the greatest of these is love")
(i myself do not respect faith that is blind, or irrational)
charity (unless you're an Objectivist)
equanimity does not mean you shouldn't be an Activist, imho
gratitude, positivity, cheer
safety, security, contentment, joy
health, peace, prosperity
Let's start from the beginning. That would be the Big Bang. Scientists tell us that's when spacetime originated. By my lights, however, there was an infinity of time beforehand, in the past, just as there is an infinity of time ahead, in the future. Can physicists and mathematicians refute this? Is "the end of time" a rational, logical phrase, or is it in fact meaningless? (with the exception of the more poetic reading, interpretation, of our own individual inevitable deaths?)
Maybe the answer doesn't even matter. Our doom could be approaching from somewhere at the speed of light. Or the sun will expand, engulfing the earth. Or global warming will make the earth uninhabitable, burning us all to a crisp. Or... on the other hand, time is irrelevant, because time-travel and teleportation are possible, and humanity can live in a loop, or a figure-eight, such as the symbol for infinity implies. A collective groundhog day, or all of us inside a computer, or something. But is immortality possible? Would it even be desirable?
Does time really double back, and intersect? Apple computer is located at 'infinite loop drive.' Do they know something I don't? Has the future visited us? Have aliens? So many interesting questions! Without knowing the answers, I adhere to the belief that life is too short, 100-odd years not enough, and immortality desirable. Life is good! Oblivion is unfortunate, as is aging, and pain/suffering. If life can be secure, comfortable, pleasant, fun- in short, utopian/heavenly -then it ought be pursued. If life only holds suffering, i.e. war, torture, hell- then even 100 years is too much.
But if reality holds the possibility of love, then eternal youth, for a lifetime of happiness, should be a scientific goal, a holy quest.
What are we, what is it that ought be extended? We are animals, bodies, not souls, or gods/demons. We are what we eat, less what we excrete. We are the roles we play, the activities/jobs we choose. We are our dna, in the environments/time/culture we find ourselves in, as well as the ones we choose for ourselves.
If we make a heavenly environment, then we should make hardier bodies, to fully enjoy a timeless existence of life and love. Exercise, fitness, health and wellness, with the goal of daily maintenance and improvement, such as body-building and yoga and vegetarianism and a vibrant sexuality, is a good place to start.
Children are a kind of immortality, perhaps. Books are another (as is any other kind of creation or artistic creativity). Although we ought keep in mind the Tibetan buddhists making their sand mandalas, to remind us of impermanence. I saw a TED talk that gave me pause, however.
It showed, like an encyclopedia set, a set of books with an individual's entire genome printed on it. I would guess it was like 50 volumes or something. The full content of our genetic code can be identified, saved. That could be made immortal, no? We could be made anew, either cloned in the real world, or the data operating in a virtual reality. Or both?
The relative value of different portions of our dna should be fully investigated, and eventually understood. Then, happiness can be maximized, while suffering minimized/reduced/eliminated.
10 words, 5 types?
You are free to construct your own typology, of course
the categories are omission/commission, mortal/venial, and original.
mortal is also called serious, or grave
there's also the 7 "deadly" sins,
which are also called cardinal, or capital.
(p.a.l.a.g.e.s): pride, avarice (greed), lust, anger, gluttony, envy, sloth.
(or, sage pal, like Budweiser!)
ccc; commission, cardinal, capital
god! (g.o.d.: grave omission deadly). (grave original deadly?) ha.
also, good: (grave omission original deadly!)
I wonder if the Pope thinks the gay pride parade is sinful.
Actually, though, I don't really care.
there's the 7 deadly sins, the 10 commandments, and
some woud say CRIME is a sin,
or going contrary to "community standards," whatever those are.
such as impiety, blasphemy, unbelief, unfaithfulness, subversion?
know what I mean?
such as: manslaughter, reckless endangerment, assault and battery, indecent exposure, attempted murder, obscenity, statutory rape, animal cruelty, motor vehicle theft, bike theft, shoplifting, vandalism, arson, littering, resisting arrest, obstruction of justice, jaywalking, for example.
criminal categories/actions, technically, but perps might not be in fact -psychologically- guilty
justified, even, perhaps.
Man's laughter? Wreck-less? (requiem), ass-salt (bacon?) and (rechargeable?) batteries, decent exposure (depending on your body!), walking like a bird (jay), t-heft (the weight of the cross) / finders keepers, drinking red rum at murder burger in Davis (the banality -and deliciousness- of evil, like a hammerhead shark), obscenity (like -ubiquitous- porn?), South Park says sex at 17 is fine (therapists and grapes), fly swatters and raid for ants and tearing butterfly's wings and throwing snails, and factory farming for carnivores is the truly obscene imho (said the shrink to the pig, you know what your problem is? you're delicious), (cat words: category, dedicated, the book '101 uses for a dead cat', catechism of the catholic church, curiosity, cat's eye bike lights, cat got your tongue, eating p, diapers), lifting a shop (?): like maybe the incredible Hulk could? (ink-red), Vandals -an east Germanic tribe that had kingdoms in the 5th century, arse-in'/our son (don't be an ass), kitty litter and also the babies of pets!! (a parallel to the term 'white trash', or even abortions), Teshara: t' share R.A. (resisting arrest) (but who wouldn't, really); and OJ (!) (obstructing justice). 4 eggs-ample.
mosquito: a mosque in Quito? (capital city of Ecuador)
Funny thought: Being Good is a form of Resisting Arrest! Guilty?
such as orgasm, offence
God with an O is still good!
Go D! or go, D. (get out, devil) (get out, dad -pain: pa in)
or, G o.d.(overdose) (too much 'g')
dog:god, as lived:devil
(marines are called 'devil dogs') (I am a 'lived god')
Gulf of Darien, Game of death, glory of death,
gravity of disease, graduate of Davis
gulp of dandelion-wine
Good old days, good orderly direction, go out dancing!
grand old duke, goals objectives discipline
grieving over dead, grief of distraught, glad of death
governor of district, green or democrat, GOP or democrat
(Al) Gore or (Gray) Davis
God or devil
Godly/good or diabolical/demonic/depraved
gratitude or dismay, grow or diminish
glad or depressed, grieving or delighted, gleeful or dour
gavinblood or d.a.g. (deputy attorney general)
glowing or dark, glamorous or dull, gone or dead, great or diminutive
grandpa or dad, german or deutsch, german or dutch
genius or dumb
google discovery, good/great day, global development
Gray Davis, Gina Davis, Grateful Dead, Green Day
Gangster Disciples, Great Depression, greatly disillusioned
Gd (gadolinium), Georgia Dome (home of Atlanta Falcons)
general disarray, grave digger, gold-digger, graduate degree
glory days, guns-drugs, general destruction, giant dick
the great divide
The Most Important Thing You Will Ever Read, lol
(some principles and virtues)
Love and be loved! Be in love.
Accept one another for who you are, and all is right, well, and good.
Everyone is a child of God (love)
and even the devil has a sweet inner-child
in need of love
and averse to pain
Life is good!
Be Happy for any or no reason at all, and do your best to
be strong, fit, healthy, sane, well, and alive!
to make the world a better place:
(you may have noticed some omissions from the scout law*, you are free to add "to taste")
(also, there's a whole book of virtues by seligman ("character strengths and virtues"), for a more comprehensive view, perhaps -which I still haven't seen)
diversity, community, inclusion, teamwork, competition, wealth
eat, drink, and be merry! To health, wealth, and happiness!
Satisfaction and contentment and well-being and joy
life, love, and laughter - look good, feel good!
open-mindedness, changed perspective:
travel, culture-shock, different languages, different religions, new music, reading, writing, role-playing, acting, lying, movies, exercise/fitness, drugs (in moderation), different jobs! willingness to step out of "comfort-zone," "psychological travel," reality-testing, thought-experiments.
Gettin' crazy (mci): madness, craziness, insanity.
Let's get crazy! -Prince, Seal
(but maybe not -legally or clinically- insane, though...)
Apparently, not everyone thinks charity is a virtue. I'm going to read some Ayn Rand and see what all this Republican libertarian "objectivist" madness is about, for myself (Atlas Shrugged, Fountainhead).
*a scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent (the scout law).
3 other scouting guidelines:
be prepared (motto). do a good turn daily (slogan).
and, of course, the Scout Oath:
On my honor, i will do my best, to do my duty, to god and my country, to obey the scout law, to help other people at all times; to keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight.
I'm not sure it's possible to help other people "at all times," but it's a worthy goal, nonetheless!
Hypnosis is everywhere, and religion is all about trying to make you happy.
God is everywhere (omnipresent0,
in your mind, in your body, in the world, in the universe
in space, time, energy, matter
present, permeating, perfect, in potential and possibility
God is love (loving, and being loved, the source of all goodness):
God is good, kind, forgiving, benevolent, merciful, compassionate
God is everywhere + good= thus, everything is good.
(thus, nothing is bad)
all-knowing, all-wise, omniscient (intelligent, curious, educated)
he understands, he knows, he comprehends, he hears (your prayers)
(a global telepath!)
knows, biblically. in sex, orgasm, intimacy, love (soil).
knows, overstands / understands.
truth, reality, virtual-reality,
enlightenment. the dark side, too.
God is all-powerful, can do anything, can answer all prayers
music and dancing and singing and shouting and clapping hands,
community, cum-unity. grace, gr-ace. praise, p-raise. pray (prey).
God the father, God the creator, the holy family (holes)
sex love intimacy touch, ecstasy orgasm cumming
hugging kissing, sucking fucking
when you're in love, both loving and loved, the world is All Right.
But we all know life is a work in progress, evil exists,
and there's a dynamic, a dialectic, a thesis/antithesis/synthesis,
in which problems get fixed, and evil is made right,
and growth, development, change, improvement, progress, betterment
happens (because shit happens).
In fact, I suspect God thinks It's ALL WRONG
because reality is FAR, FAR off from possibility, potentiality, perfection.
So that's what God is (an attempt at hypnosis, in pursuit of progress)
evil can be a lot of fun
if you're a monster
(even bad can be good, from a demonic/devilish/diabolical perspective)
devil= d-evil. 4 evil. For evil.
fun is good!!
but pain, agony, suffering, torment, misery, anguish
anger, hatred, rage, wrath, fury
sorrow, sadness, weeping, wailing, crying, tears
depression, oppression, repression
gnashing of teeth, hopelessness, despair
cruelty, ruthlessness, savagery, torture, brutality
wickedness, evil, depravity, sin, crime, hell
illegal, criminal, unlawful, wrong, immoral, unethical, bad
iniquity, transgression, turpitude
should be minimized, reduced, eliminated, overcome, fought
Upright Moral Probity ire. Umpire calls the strikes. Shot-caller.
God knows. He knows if you've been bad or good.
So be good for goodness' sake. (< or the japanes rice-wine)
I went in to the bank this morning to exchange coin rolls for cash, and was greeted by a man who asked me how I was doing, which apparently is his job, which I ignored, because I didn't feel like being cheery, to which he asked again, so I lied and said fine or something. I told the teller, a woman, that this man was a "cheer nazi," because he was making me feel unwelcome for not being happy. I have the right to be unhappy, goddamit. Okay? Alright? There's a lot of shit to be unhappy about, and actually, this employee is just one more reason. Seriously, that's his job? What a stupid job, if you ask me. Get a real job. And if I don't feel like engaging with him, he shouldn't get aggressive about it. After I told the teller I felt unwelcome, he continued (passive-aggressively) with an insincere "have a nice day". FU, asshole, and F U wells fargo. Maybe I'll put my money elsewhere. You know, they didn't even reply to my suggestion that they put the total (checking plus savings) on their website. Strike two. If they really want me to be happy, they'll have some sensitivity that not everyone feels like being cheery with complete strangers, or forced to act cheery, or felt unwelcome after not pretending to be cheery. Shit happens. There are zillions of reasons to be unhappy. Forcing people to pretend to be happy is just another reason, okay? I shouldn't have to mention Syria, the Phillipines, the Oakland fire, Trump, pain, sympoms, grief, or what have you. Stop trying to cheer me up. I don't even think the greeter enjoyed his job. I don't need it, I don't like him, and I resent having to deal with this shit every time I enter your goddamn bank.
While in Belize,
Greg (my brother) and Liz (his wife) had their second son,
Declan Gregory Teshara
who I am eager to meet,
and be Uncle Jesse to, as I am for
Benjamin and Augustus, already
all ready? all brownie? all greenie?
not funny, oh well.
Neither is pointing out Niger, Haiti, and Ireland,
Winnie the pooh, shattuck,
krusteaz, murano, compass, and country (!)
And, if you're hungry, there's also Bolivia, Chili, Syria, Turkey (ha!)
I've never heard the name Declan, but Sara has.
'deck-lin', I believe
reminds me of elan, a french word (also used in english)
I am so happy the birth went well.
Weirdly, Declan's birthday happened exactly on the due date, which was also Greg's 37th birthday (!!) What a gift, eh?!
It was really nice. More than nice:
Lovely, beautiful, relaxing, needed.
I got a sunburn (shoulders), though.
That, and a tweaked (right) elbow,
and blisters on a thumb and toe.
un-Belize-able. Kenya Belize it?
I didn't go to Kenya, but I have a hat
I bought a t-shirt and a basket
(and brought home some shells, too)
I miss it already!
(but it's nice to be home, as well)
We (Sara, Pierre, Augustus, and I) went to Caye Caulker
pronounced Key Cocker
there are 3 theories how the island got its name:
sailers actually caulking their boats
"corker" - sailers getting cork for their casks
and the anglicization of "hicaco" (the coconut plum)
(so that's why it's not mentioned in Wikipedia)
Belize used to be British Honduras
They speak English
The gvt, (but not the people, actually, I'm told)
wanted independence, which they got in 1981 (recent!)
They use BZD (belize dollars 2bzd:1 american dollar)
both currencies are used.
The motto there (in CC) is: Go Slow
which I've taken to heart, and brought home with me.
We ate well, and I spent like $300+
I ran out of money, actually, and made it simpler,
by putting things on my "tab" (to SPA)
which was not strictly tabulated,
but i'm told is around $150
I bought gnc omega 3, and muttivitamins before i left, too.
I have a dogwalk today (at 1p, Orion)
so ya, Pierre and I went kayaking, and saw
some big fish (turbot?), some divebombing pelicans, jumping fish
(and of course i single handedly fought off an alligator
while P got speared by a swordfish!)
we also biked around the island, and saw
the cemetery, catholic church, wildlife sanctuary, rasta church,
asemblea de dios, casa de dios.
I was told not to poke around the cemetery.
hopefully i didn't get zika, but all of us got bit.
the 4 of us came in by water taxi from Belize City (where we spent a night).
(belize of the beast)
cheap food, panty-rippers
We ate well, ate italian twice, met Dutch travelers
(I learned Holland is a province in Netherlands)
The two taxi drivers (from, to the airport) were helpful
There's drugs, corruption, cronyism, "bosses"
swimming in the ocean with Augustus,
swinging in hammocks
riding in golf carts
and seeing shad, needlenose gar, melodious blackbird,
red-throated frigate bird, miniature crabs (and sand-mites!)
there were pigeons, petrels(?), a humming bird, ants
and we saw a small jellyfish, pulsing
as well as globs of jelly (kinda egg shaped) (ambergris??)
(I recently learned ambergris is "whale vomit")
Lots of stray and wandering free dogs (including Ipu (e-poo))
we didn't see seahorse, or sea turtle, or sharks
(because we didn't scuba or snorkel out by the reef)
there were little ant-hills in the sand in the shallows, underwater
We stayed at Wish Willy's (air b and b house, i think)
we saw wild lizards and (grey) iguanas
(my belize t-shirt has a (green) iguana on it)
it was hot and we kept the fans on.
SPA all went out swimming while it was raining.
I thought of enya (caribbean blue), and madonna ("tropical the island breeze")
reggae was popular
I brought Moby Dick to read, but didn't
Didn't go into the jungle (but the flight in came over a lot)
so no howler monkeys, jaguars, toucans, or climbing pyramid
i'm told the pyramid is rebuilt, not authentic.
the cave-tubing was praised by Joy, next to me, on the flight to Houston.
We considered taking the "manatee madness" tour.
global warming, the island was hotter than usual (but i liked it)
balmy breeze (say cheese! -ha, a reference to brie)
maybe next time! You better Belize it!
So I'm flying with friends to Belize this week. 30th thru 5th. Then back to dogwalking. I was told over Thanksgiving dinner by those in the know (Chris and Sarah had their honeymoon there) to bring mosquito repellent. Flip-flops might be good. I have sandals. I'm reading Moby Dick, The Economist, and of course the Belize lonely planet guide (with a section on Caye Caulker). I've got Belize City weather on my phone. Looks like thunder storms! I'll bring my meds, my phone, my book, enough clothes, and repellant, along with my passport, in just one carry-on (that fits overhead). Don't need much. It's a chill-out destination. I'll help Pierre and Sara with Augustus, kinda like a nanny. My folks are helping with the airfare. I'm always updating my budget (daily), and I have about $4100 bucks. I don't need to bring much, I think. I should say I'm thinking of buying an e-bike. People always ask, are you excited? No. Not much. I'm just hoping for safe flights, a safe water taxi to the island, not getting robbed, and not getting Zika! I've had a rough week, symptom-wise. Schizophrenia is a BITCH. Really, seriously, hellish, sometimes. Not just annoying, but painful. Maybe I need a med adjustment. Anyway, I helped my folks with the Christmas lights on their tree today, in San Francisco. I took Bart out to Glen Park, and rode the 23 bus up Monterey. Greg helped bring the tree in, yesterday. I hope the lights don't start a fire. We split the strings to two outlets, to be safer (the base of the bottom string got hot, and blew a fuse). Benjamin's new brother or sister is due soon. Uncle Jesse, otra vez. Tio Chuy. We don't know the sex, or name, yet. They speak English in Belize, former British colony. Thanksgiving dinner was delicious. I offended Liz' dad, John, by not greeting him, which I feel bad about. There were 13 of us, plus bump... I just immediately started playing with Ben, instead of being social. He said I discarded him like an old shirt, or something. I don't know what to say to that. Well, so it goes. Ugh. Sorry. I sat next to the sheriff, Vicki. I asked her if her email server was secure, lol. And she read the Terry Pratchett book I gave her last year (with commander Vimes). I had a burrito again from La Corneta, at Glen Park (carne asada super, black beans, spicy salsa), with a snapple. I like the trivia. Today's fact? I forget. But I told my mom that jellyfish don't have brains. Which I picked up from the "weird-o-pedia" Oakland library book that I just renewed online yesterday. I forget why the topic of fish brains came up. And I forget what airline we're taking. I have the itinerary in my (greatly backlogged) email. I remember what I forget, lol. It was good seeing (my cousin) Patrick. He wants to backpack Europe (maybe alone), which sounds fun, if/after he gets approved for permanent disability. My status will be reviewed in 2018. I hope I get well, but I also am anxious about losing my benefits. I didn't win yesterday's lottery, lol. I got 47, though. DoG! I see all these homeless people, and freaks me out, but on the other hand, maybe I can find a rewarding and enjoyable career. But I also want to read hundreds of books, to say nothing of the daily/weekly news (ny times / economist). I'm not sure I want to pursue dating. Maybe I'm better off alone. Sara and Pierre could move to New York, if bitcoin gets approved for atm's there, I think is the situation. I'm still listening to a lot of music, mostly college radio. 10:20, past my bedtime. JT :-) goodnite.
Everyone dies, the wages of sin is death, there is not one who does not sin. Only God is good. Only God should play God, and by God, I mean nature/time. Everyone should die of old age. Premature and unnatural death is wrong. Thou shalt not kill, vengeance is mine sayeth the lord. Karma is a natural justice system, unlike the forced human legalistic one. Even torturers and terrorists should not be killed. Life is good! Life is a gift, precious, and temporary. Prison, not death, is a better punishment. The best justice system, however, is repentance, forgiveness, and freedom. Repentance and the resolve to be good, not to commit crime. "Go forth, and sin no more" should be the end of it. Adding punishment to the original crime only adds to the suffering in the world. There is always the possibility of virtue, being/doing good, in the future. All life has meaning and value. Hate the sin, love the sinner. Killing killers isn't justice, it's hypocrisy.
1. Aids. prison rape. incarceration. hell (on earth).
2. Hell (forevermore)
3. Love. The victim loves/is loved (parents, family, soulmate).
4. God's law. God says not to. Sinful ('Thou shalt not kill')
5. The victim has a long life ahead of him/her. Finality of death (life unlived).
6. It's suicide. The victim is you.
7. The victim has character, is interesting.
8. karma. justice. vengeance. ("the price of sin is death")
9. suffering. theirs, yours. guilt. animals'. well-being.
10. k-ill. it's sick, unhealthy, diseased, unwell, ill.
11. it's criminal. self-image: you are not a criminal. you are good. you are not a sinner. you love yourself. self-respect.
12. just to prove you're not possessed, to defy the devil, to have mastery over your dark side, to be like yoda.
13. the greater good, everyone is better off alive, life is good.
14. to set an example. live and let live.
15. to resist temptation. superego vs. id. supremacy of conscience over hate.
16. to go to heaven. (joyful immortality) (heavenly reward)
17. for love
sin, guilt, crime, punishment, hell, foregoing heaven/love, respect, self-respect, maturity, willpower, kindness, perspective (we're all in the same boat), righteousness, hope.
fuck you, Satan!
(demons, hellions, vampires, monsters, criminals, the wicked -are not your 'crew')
No one deserves death.
Everyone is their own universe.
No one lives forever.
Time entails potential for progress.
Everyone's life has meaning.
Let God play God. Acts of God. Time/Nature (senescence, old-age) are best.
Murder has 4 victims (victim, perp, loved ones', society)
Sex, intimacy, touch, orgasm, ecstasy.
loss, grief, sadness, pain, despair.
Life is good!!
crazy train (all aboard!!)
casey jones, grateful dead. drivin' that train, high on cocaine..
(casey jones you better watch your speed. trouble ahead, trouble behind..)
(and you know that notion just crossed mind!)
loco, crazy. motive, component of a crime.
(a locomotive is different from a train. i didn't learn that til yesterday!)
(an engine is a pretty loco motive to commit a crime)
(but maybe an injun isn't)(the train made me do it!)
choo-choo (sound of the whistle)
iron-horse (how many horsepower?)
whistle, horn, bell. steam whistle. air horn. brass bell.
toot toot! honk honk! ding ding!
clang clang! (crossing guard, signal)
(uh-oh! watch out! beware! caution! look out, here i come.)
here it comes. getting closer. waving. hi! going past. bye!
steam engine. black smoke, white steam.
burning coal heats the water into steam to power the engine
steam pressure, let off some steam, release
old steam engine train, cow-catcher, caboose
cargo/freight train. passenger train. amtrak. bart. light rail. muni.
trolley, street car. electric trains. third rail. overhead power lines.
diesel engines. tssss. brakes hissing, like a snake. sibilant.
training bra. c.i.t. (counselor in training), sports training
flat cars, box cars, tank cars
piggy back shipping containers, intermodal
bridges, ascent, descent, up up, down down, climb, coast
i think i can i think i can. the little engine that could.
through the tunnel, inside the mountain, light at the end of the tunnel
runaway train (movie)
derail, (derailed train of thought)
tracks, rails, ties, spikes, rock/gravel bed
toy trains, thomas, lego trains, xmas trains, narrow gauge
the only difference between men and boys is the price of their toys
chugga chugga, chuff chuff chuff...
"de-train" (term used by amtak conductor)
sleeping car, dining car, viewing car
double-decker, coast starlight express, capitol corridor
tied up on the tracks / homicide
ellen trainor (actress), E.T.
trucks, trailers, trains, tracks, tram, trolley, travel, trip, trippy
roundabout rotates, swivels
old/new, bullet trains, maglev (magnetic levitation)
commuter trains, stations, station-master, stationary
museum, wikipedia, youtube videos, google pics, tilden park
zoo train, disneyland train
choo choo Chuy. chew your food. charleston chew. chewbacca.
$15,762 in credit card debt
$27,141 in auto loans
$48,172 in student loans
The average household income is $53,482
Trump wants us to double it.
I don't have any debt. I only buy with what I have, within budget.
I get free food pantry groceries. free library!
my brother pays for my iphone (ongoing xmas gift)
my mom pays for my gym membership ($35.20/mo)
My rent is $725 (includes wifi/utilities), (about a dollar/hour!)
(I get $615 in social security/mo)
I have a disability (schizophrenia, a mental illness)
(i use a disability bart pass) (i'm on the Kaiser medi-medi plan)
(my meds -olanzapine, risperdal- are $1.20 (!), plus free dental, vision)
(my folks are paying for my trip to Belize with Sara, Pierre, Augustus)
I have made $4280.10 to date from Wag! (sinch March this year)
I have $4066.12 in checking plus savings, a/o today.
I am currently reading Moby Dick, by Herman Melville
- I have a noon half-hour walk today with Toshi, in Oakland :-)
- No car: I bike, bart, or bus (mostly bicycle)
- I'll visit the Apple store today to fix my ipad; and get phone help:
(center button doesn't work, and photos are out of memory)
- And i need to renew my driver's license at the dmv.
Well, the USA will have a new pres on 1/20/17, and it's The Donald. Amazing. The polls yesterday said he only had a 16% chance. My uncle won the bet he made with my bro's wife. I voted Hillary, less enthusiastically than my vote for Bernie, and read her entire wikipedia article, read the first 200 (of 900, large print) pages of her Hard Choices book, and looked at her website. She'd been preparing for president almost her whole life (aside from wanting to be an astronaut). I never read Trump's wikipedia page. I haven't even seen his tv show. I'm not even clear on what's attractive about being conservative, truth told. I know Hillary used to be Republican, and Trump used to be a Democrat. I watched Oliver's youtube videos about the wall, and drumpf, and raisins, as well as the litany of Trump's offensives from Seth Meyers, and it all sounded pretty convincing. I still don't think the wall is going to happen (at least on budget, or paid for by Mexico!!). I actually believe in open borders and precedence of humanism over nationalism. I barely even consider myself an American. When I recited the pledge of allegiance as a teenager at the Boy Scout summer camp, I changed it to united states of the "world", and to the "unity" for which it stands, one "planet" under (or over!) God. I was hoping he would get a tv channel, and Hillary would show us what she could do, having achieved her life's ambition.
I guess the election was kind of a personality-contest. Trump is occasionally funny, while Hillary always seemed dour, and her giddiness feigned (to me). Also, there's "the secret", which says you shouldn't be against war, for example, because that just causes more war; you're supposed to be FOR something. Hillary made the campaign less about pro her than about against DJT, which only worked to his advantage. Thirdly, Hillary is pro-choice, which, in my view, really does make her a "nasty woman" (which is better than calling her a baby-killer). Hillary is personally against abortion, but didn't have the cajones to be for legislating prohibition of what she actually considers wrong. Then again, I wouldn't enforce vegetarianism...
ANyway, I liked Trump's brief acceptance speech. It was inspiring, the bit about untapped potential. I myself am trying to escape the hindrance of being mentally ill. America is already great, but twice as good sounds even better! Did I hear him correctly? He wants us to double our GDP? I'd like to make twice as much, for one. He made his victory about us, less about him, which I liked. I'm trying to be positive, making good of this. (He who creates hell deserves hell. If he's really for torture worse than waterboarding, then that's evil. That will not make America safer.) I know he collects bibles. Does he have a Koran? Does he believe in karma? There are 1.6B muslims in the world, almost a quarter of humanity. They are not the enemy. Only a few. He pledged to serve all Americans, and that's quite a diversity! And a public servant should be about reducing suffering, increasing happiness, and not simply the almighty dollar. God is love, and love believes all things. I'll try and believe Trump will be a fantastic president! And maybe the Waltons won't be as selfish, for example. The red hats, I hope, are not code for HAT-RED.
I am shocked! Currently charged with battery?
Could I speak with who's in charge?
elect Rick! he has +'s and -'s, though. elect Ron.
does he live in the tri-city area?
the train conductor will take you there
coffee makes me wired
we made a connection
after meditating, i was grounded
i'll contact my agent
knowledge is power
in shock, needing medical assistance
electrocution reminds me of bug-zappers (and fry's electronics)
electro-magnetic (energy, spectrum, radiation)
resistance is futile
breakers on the beach
use the force, luke
pee: power, electricity, energy
the late test
my personal "noose"paper
busy day today
1.reported last months income/paystubs to social security (self-employed, independent contractor)
2.library- skim ny times, acquire food resource sheets to distribute to beggars
3.gym- watched tv during stationary bike, learned about 9 day stock market record
4.gnc -$87.58 of food. free protein bar. (member discount, plus coupon)
5.3 dogwalks, 2 hourlongs, 1 half hour. I really don't like night walks.
(Sparkle, Zephyr, and Tank)(made $63.50)
(i still have $50 itunes, $50 amazon)
6.bkly food pantry- shorter line than usual, 2+ bags of groceries
7.also, McGee church free lunch, plus "shopping" table of 3 salads, and 1 wrap.
extra sensory perception
every single problem
espanol (spanish, in spanish)
a. the universal language
b. the healing force of the universe
Rusty Jeffers, John Terilli, Ashrita Furman
Jim Morris (vegetarian bodybuilder)
(I bought 2 strawberry gnc amplified wheybolic extreme 60's today, with coupon)
everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.
M- "The Gospel teaches love, not the apocalypse "
(in reference to Harold Camping, a "very bad theologian" who "missed the rapture and got to die like the rest of us." died in 2013. the end-times hoopla I remember was in 2011. I heard him on the radio while I was tuning in to the World Series.
J-Aren't there 4 horsemen?
M-"lots of imagery. horsemen, angels, vials of wrath and plague and pestilence, lots of symbolism: Christ the Lamb slain..."
J-The wages of sin is death, there is no one without sin. So the victory of good over evil is when we all die (I interpret that individually, not a collective extinction). How's my theology, presbyter? I had a delicious lamb gyro the other day, lol. Poor Christ, always getting eaten. I think the worms must have got him long ago.
M- "The wages of sin are death, but the free gift of God is Eternal life through Jesus Christ. Romans 6.23. Salvation is a gift we receive by faith."
J- Well his beliefs I guess are an ongoing ("living") meme. Belief= be lie F, whatever that means. Be truth A? I don't think oblivion can be overcome by anyone, faithful or no. But I'd like to be surprised. Flying horses are kind of like Santa's reindeer!
feeling asexual, misanthropic, possessed/sick, even dumb
sss. social security, sibilance, still sad about Sarah Salazar.
g-d (dead and gone)
'why don't you order the economist'
'it makes you feel well'
'i'm swallow, jess'
'your soul is toll militant'
'it's a weed puppet'
'you ARE my money. huh.'
i know you'll turn eventually
into a somewhat human person
you're law as well
i know you're a vegetable
is why i know it's weird
i fucking can't do it. i can't do anyone. because you're law.
u r loose if e
jess you still trip out everybody
i'm not right (x3)
i've never been capable of handling you
no more sugar for the next year, do you understand?
you have a fat ten
that is a fat jew to you
no one has ever done what you did
jess u r a little bit genius interesting
you killed my children jess
you can be Satan jess
here's why. you're law
that is your net
that is your weekly problem
jess you've got it all me to slay
you have what it takes to become an exTREMEly well individual
recently read books:
Grunt, by Mary Roach
Between the World and Me, Ta Nehise Coates
The Box, by Marc Levinson
on deck: Belize (travel guide), Moby Dick, Weird-o-pedia,
Hard Choices (by HRC)
(also hard) looked into Hard Problem, a play by Stoppard
-my cousin-in-law, Dan Clegg, is in the A.C.T. play currently underway (the review i read online by Rowan Hooper of the New Scientist was unappreciative- think I'll skip it)
dinner on Sunday with parents in SF
will bring for mom: tupperware, (repaired) bracelet (bday gift),
oatmeal raisin cookie from Adeline's bakery.
can of cranberry sauce.
Naked is beautiful. But,
unfortunately, it's usually illegal. So, when out of the home, or
not on a nude beach or tolerant foreign country, you must be attired.
What to wear? If you consider the question trivial, or not worth
thinking about repeatedly, you can follow in the footsteps of the
illustrious Albert Einstein, who only wore grey, so his mind could
remain occupied with weightier things/matters. If you don't mind
spending time and money on the sartorial, and all things fashionable,
you might subscribe to the principle of 'look good, feel good.'
Naked SHOULD look good, so if you don't like your appearance, the gym
is a good place to start. The reward is worth it. In tandem with
this, however, you should wear nice 'threads'. Dressing well really
does help you feel good. Even space-time is considered a “fabric.”
Priests are “men of the cloth.” And people with a surfeit of
personality are “colorful.” Intelligent people are “bright.”
If you feel bad, making yourself look good is a good first step to
turning your frown upside down. First impressions are important, and
you should dress to impress. Vestments are an investment! And your
personality will conform to the image you seek to present. You are
an actor -all the world's a stage. Every day is Halloween! Or, if
you're not dressed to kill, so to speak, you can dress for success,
because every day is a costume party! Your image, of course, is more
than your body and your clothes. What you say, what you don't say,
how you say it, including body-language, and your hair, facial and
otherwise, as well as scent, all matter. Don't burp, fart, spit,
pick your nose, sneeze and cough, any more than you would shit or
vomit in public. Some things should remain private. Flatulence,
eructation, expectoration, and excretion should not be on display.
Smile. You're on your way.
This is of course all highly
superficial. You want your quality to have depth. Don't talk to
yourself. Talk to God in private. Be happy, and others will want to
be around you. Be interesting. Cultivate wisdom and knowledge, be
curious, there is always more to learn. Love life, and your
enthusiasm will be infectious. Life is good, so do what you must to
beat the blues (unless you're a democrat, ha). Make yourself
useful, and do what you're good at/appreciated for, and enjoy, and
you will making a living while having fun. Life should not be an
endless series of chores. Play! Variety, as they say, is the spice
of life. Mix it up! Keep yourself challenged, motivated, growing,
interested. If you're bored, then you're boring, Tony Robbins said.
And success isn't just money, or even necessarily monetary at all.
You're worth is not you're “net worth.” You can make the world a
better place just as much as Bill Gates. Thrive, alive! I suspect
a lifetime supply of heroin, intelligently “strung-out” could
make you as happy as anyone ever was or ever could be. But a better
plan, I imagine, that will keep you alive (a lot) longer, is being in
love, first with yourself, then your life, then a significant other,
then with everyone, in the realization that we're all in this
together, and we all face the same problems, and we all want to help
each other out, toward mutual peace, joy, comfort, and knowing.
Bliss lurks everywhere. Being happy is not as impossible as it can
seem, and in fact can be as simple as pumping out some exercise
endorphins, listening to music, reading a poem (or all 3 at once).
I like writing, and making lists of
happy things to do. Maybe you should, too. Cultivate positivity,
and eventually everything becomes enjoyable. Eating, napping,
watching, listening, reading, talking, being creative, traveling,
thinking, playing, learning, teaching, knowing you did your best,
it's all good. God says thou shalt not kill, so maybe crushing thy
enemy shouldn't be on the list. But learning self-defense is always
a good idea, I think. If you live right, maybe you won't have any
enemies. I believe God loves the devil, even though he's a piece of
shit. Even shit can be helpful, no? Being in love is the ultimate
answer. Everything is some shit, lol. Progress requires
destruction, time entails death, and comfort pain. Hatred is a
challenge that is ultimately a joy to conquer, if you manage to not
be consumed by it. That's all I have to say.
also, General Dynamics, the world's 5th largest defense contractor.
They make the F-16.
Cal Institute for the Arts (have a cousin who went there)
Cairo International Airport (CAI, iata code)
Central Intelligence Agency
plus (5) "embeds":
Drink Lupicia tea and take Cialis with Felicia Ciara Garcia!
words containing 'cia' : LINK
(11) same letters:
ica, islamic consultative assembly (main legis. body of the iranian gvt)
iron chef america (tv show)
region, province, capital, and river in Peru
immaculate conception academy (in sf, my mom went there)
aic, alice in chains
aci, air crash investigation
alameda county industries (local trash and recycling)
iac, international access code (telecommunications)
cai, computer assisted instruction
cai rivers (Brazil) (Vietnam)
God is the central intelligent agent? omniscient!
G-D: google discovery
Turn that frown upside down!
gloom and doom / grieving death to
with 2 caveats-
1.her giddiness strikes me as feigned. my god, get real.
she's a hawk, and pro-choice, and carnivore, who supports the death penalty
but I still like her
and I dislike Trump (a lot) link
Her and abortion is like me and vegetarianism:
I see all the arguments, and consider them valid, but can't bring myself to close the deal.
I like meat!
She thinks abortion should remain legal!
(despite personally seeing abortion of an "unborn person" as "morally wrong") link
We should both change and not be hypocrites, I suppose.
(although killing your own baby seems worse than killing a farm animal)
we all have failings. nobody's perfect.
(except God? your perfect self, as the Pope being infallible would attest)
(even Jesus said "why do you call me good. only God is good.")
I read HRC (which also stands for both the Human Rights Campaign, and Commission)
is a devout Methodist. She goes to the FU Methodist Church, lol. (Foundry United). Methodists believe:
"Do all the good that you can, by all the means that you can, in all the ways you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as you ever can." -John Wesley, founder of Methodism.
If that were all there is to being Methodist-
We should all be Methodists! (I like the Dead Milkmen song, Methodist coloring book)
method to the madness: atheist methodist! a.m.
Also, I like Bill (a Baptist)
Bill thinks life begins with breath (the spirit of God).
It's a fact, though, that life starts at conception.
Maybe we should think of orgasm as the spirit! ("omg")
i don't want to be evil,
but I honestly don't think there's much difference between
squashing a bug
from shooting somebody.
Humans are just another kind of animal.
I live with a "bug" in my head, and would love to squash him, which i guess is the devil's way of aggravation in the pursuit of bringing me to the dark side).
"lead us not into temptation" ("deliver us" from evil)
Thou shalt not kill.
You should not kill.
Killing is wrong.
That's what God says, right?
Is God lying? (god is a man of war. the art of war is deception -sun tzu)
"it's all good" (is that biblical, too?) (god is love. love believes all things)
is it the devil or god who wants you to abort?
is it still wrong if neither exist!! (i think so)
again, adoption is the loving choice.
nobody can judge their baby to be better off dead, no?
Life is good!
I got my ballot in the mail, today.
17 state propositions (51-67)
I've got both the democrats' and the greens' endorsement lists.
They differ on 6 of them. (51,54,60,61,63,65)
I'm told the best way to choose is to see who the backers/funders are.
I believe in pursuing your curiosity, unfettered.
So everyone should have access to libraries and the internet (and librarians).
I kind of think teachers get in the way, actually.
But I've had a lot of really great teachers, as well.
I think all books should be available digitally, to everyone, free.
And there should be systems like I enjoy here in Berkeley, available globally, for actual physical books. I have in mind the Link+ system, which links hundreds of libraries, and can obtain most anything. I think education investment should be for that.
Questions, answered in forums, are just as good as a classroom, imho.
and online classes, like coursera, open yale courseware, flashcards, etc. are great, too!
The best teachers should teach everyone!
Everybody should get a phone/tablet/computer.
Language instruction needs classrooms. Or travel and immersion.
Dems say yes, Greens no.
I have to say No.
Jerry Brown thinks the money would be better spent in poorer districts.
My dad is the director of the Burlingame Adult School.
So I'll have to ask him, I guess.
And my aunt was the principal of St. Elizabeth's, in Oakland.
I'll see her this Saturday (her birthday! (friday))
54. Legislature Transparency
Dems say no, Greens yes.
after reading the green rationale, I have no idea.
60. Mandating condoms in porn
dems no, greens whatever.
Making porn less sexy is better for women?
61. drug purchasing
dems whatever, greens yes.
I say yes.
National Nurses United, which supported Bernie say yes, while the drug industry and Ca doctors are in an "incestuous and cozy" financial relationship.
63. firearms and ammunition sales prohibition
dems say yes, greens no.
it sounds good, but the greens are right, because it exempts cops and retired cops (ordinary citizens, like us, some of whom abused their power), a violation of equal protection standards.
I used to be a grocery store "courtesy-clerk" (bagger)
I would say "kill a tree or erode the ozone?"...
Dems whatever, Greens no.
"one of the most disingenuous ballot measures in state history"
I think I'm a green, lol.
I'm a registered Dem
The green voter guide is well-researched and extremely persuasive.
see it yourself! :
1.strategies for coping with stress
stress can be internal (body/mind), or external (e.g. relationships)
out, in: out of your head, in the present moment
meditate, nap, go to church
read, listen to music, watch tv
write/journal/blog, make art
good food, enough sleep
sameness can be good. change can be good, too.
this reminds me of my list of activities (Most Everything):
bio: body, input, output
b-eat, exercise, sleep
i-read, watch, listen
o-write, talk, create
vatog: visual, auditory, tactile, olfactory, gustatory
(see, hear, touch, smell, taste)
2.participate in treatments that help you recover
kaiser "wellness club" (tuesdays/thursdays 10:30a to 12p, drop-in),
therapy- e.g. cbt (cognitive behavioral therapy) group, individual
meds (i.e. medication, medicine, pharmaceuticals, drugs)
community, family, friends
3.build social supports
we all need someone to lean on! -Rolling Stones (Let it bleed)
211 (3 digit phone number to connect you with services)
Kaiser Oakland Dept. of Psychiatry (752-1075)
google 'crisis support', or 'suicide hotline'
Berkeley has a Mobile Crisis Team
(981-5900, for quick service, connects to police dept.,
who will contact MCT for you)
4.use medication effectively
-follow dosage/frequency, as directed
- changes mind/behavior: find balance between Authenticity and
Staying out of trouble (e.g. hospital or jail)
-side-effects, interaction effects (be aware of)
-adjust as necessary
-some can self-medicate, w/o professional (i.e. doctor's) guidance
(alcohol and pot and tobacco, e.g., can work/help,
but also be problematic)
-if you're on vacation/forgot your meds, you can get
like 1 week of Emergency supply from most pharmacies
5.recognize events or situations that contributed to Relapses in past.
ADL changes (activities of daily living)
(for me, a pot edible) also,
my handwriting changes (wide range, from neat/legible to not)
6.know early warning signs that you might be starting to have a relapse
-ew signs, lol
get help, before becoming full-blown
-family, friends, professional(s)
My friend Caitlin had an essay on sex/internet yesterday, so:
I queried Google with 'what percentage of internet traffic is porn?"
-depending on how you measure it, anywhere between 4 to 30%
I overheard someone say that "The body regenerates all its cells every 7 years, so technically we become a new person..."
-This is false. Brain cells/neurons from the cerebral cortex, don't get replaced, for example. Different tissues have different growth and replacement rates. Fat is replaced at a rate of 10% a year (so new fat every 10 years, on average).
I also overheard today,
'Habanero' is actually the word for a resident of Havana, Cuba.
The pepper is named that on the theory that it has a Cuban origin.
I saw a sign today,
it said 1/4 of the homeless are U.S. military veterans.
This is false, too. It was estimated in 2013, 12% of the homeless were veterans. Either way, it's a big problem.
'Latin' america is a weird term. I mean, they don't speak Latin.
But Spanish, Portuguese, and French (as well as Italian, Romanian, and Catalan) are Romance languages (itself named after Roman origins, not necessarily xo flowers and candy and makin' whoopie), which are all derived from "vulgar" Latin (Vulgar doesn't mean that all they spoke were swear-words!) It means the common/colloquial/nonstandard sociolect, contrasted with "classical" Latin.
from Snapple facts:
(It's a big reason I buy snapple! I wish other companies provided trivia, too. U-haul does),
I learned that "the average dog can understand over 150 words."
I was wondering why Ireland is the land of ire. I mean, really?
Turns out, as entertaining as that might be, Ireland is actually named after a pre-christian goddess of the land and sovereignty (the matron goddess of the island), Eire, derived from Old Irish 'Eriu'. So much for being the land of anger and rage and irritation! Even Hell, Norway, is a pretty nice place!
As if I don't have enough, already
starting 2017 (giving myself 3 months to prepare)
-idea: a sheet to record what i've read, daily/year.
age 45, but starting fresh daily :-)
job i love, woman i love, in love with life (ILL!!)
read lists, (then everything, the entire library!*)
travel, restaurants, museums
body-build, daily maintenance/improvement
buy house, raise a family
that seems like enough, lol
and i'm happy, already! (enjoying myself being alone, actually)
(so it doesn't matter as much if I never achieve completion!)
Books I've Loved:
The Prisoner of Zenda was my favorite book, when I was a kid.
(by Anthony Hope)
Douglas Adams, Anne Rice, Kurt Vonnegut, Mark Twain
Franzen, Anais Nin, Tolkien
Isabel Allende- house of spirits
Gabriel Garcia Marquez- 100 years of solitude
Mikhail Bulgakov- The Master and Margarita
Pratchett and Gaiman- Good Omens
Camus- The Stranger; Sartre -Nausea
Burroughs- Naked Lunch
Alejo Carpentier- The Lost Steps
George Eliot- Middlemarch
Manzoni- The Betrothed
Yuval Noah Harari -Sapiens
The Year's Best Horror and Fantasy (short stories)
Leopold- A Sand County Almanac
Jorge Amado- Tent of Miracles
atlas, proust, bible
maybe Shakespeare (if you can get the weird words clarified)
more recently enjoyed:
Lev Grossman, Bill Bryson, Terry Pratchett (word candy!)
(actually, no. plenty nutritious brain food)
1. a)Bill Gates recommendations (from his blog); link
b)Jose Vargas, friend, lit instructor, suggestions:
Ficciones -Borges, El Reino de este mundo, nocturno de chile
Between the world and me, by Ta-Nehise Coates
c)Michael Helbush, friend, retired professor; link (Bloom's canon)
noted, especially: Melville's -Moby Dick
d)Pierre's picks: The Expanse sci-fi series, by James SA Corey
2.1001 books you Must Read Before You Die
(I photocopied the author index); link
3. title index, (forgot the source, mystery book!)
from Absalom Absalom to Zuckerman Unbound.
(also photocopied, just the titles-list)
4. 501 Must-Read Books
(I shrunk 2 pages to fit on one photocopied page, small print) link (I think this online list is different)
5. The complete set of Newbery award winners and honor-books
*maybe I'll learn to be able to speedread with superintelligent ability at some point in the future.
I am God. You may think I have a God complex. I do. But, in the words of Bob Marley, Almighty God is a living man. Jesus is dead. I, however, am alive. Kindness is my religion. God is a role to play, an identity. Maybe I AM. God is One, love, a man of war, and good. G-D just means go do good! What's love got to do with it? In the end, only kindness matters. I don't claim to be omni-anything. And no, I don't think I'm better than you. You're God, too.