James Nachtwey, war photographer

Check out his site, www.jamesnachtwey.com

Remember how lucky (or blessed, if that's your belief) you are,
and
Keep your priorities balanced...

I could be at an all you can eat at Sizzler tonight.
I watched the documentary 'War Photographer' instead.

We should all be allowed to enjoy life, and feel good about the choices we make.

Happy Halloween

My wife says I am a bad person

probably for several reasons. She fell asleep in bed and says I "yelled" at her. She says that alot, when in my view, I just raise my voice. I can't recall ever actually yelling at her. I'm still bad, though: She asked me recently would I receive a million dollars if I knew someone would die because of it, and I said yes.


I mean, you'd be set for life with a mil, no?

and the environmentalists keep saying there's too many people for a sustainable world.

and what ARE people actually worth?
Let's see, I'm 38 and say I have 70 years ahead of me. 365x70x x

25,550x

That's about 39.20 per day

Are people, writ large, worth that much? 6.7B ppl
Probably more, in fact, I'm guessing.
All the money in the world, right now, totals to:

US dollars:
M0=908.6B
M1(cash plus checking)=1,655.6B
M2(+money mkt accounts, savings, and cd's)=$8,326.8 billion
M3(plus large cd's)=10.3T

The public funds injected into the economy total about 11T.
No one online knows? what a mess.

10 bucks a day seems like it should be sufficient.
I bought a Haagen-Dazs everyday on that, when that was my allowance.

boo!

Relevant Wikipedia info:
Gross world product (GWP) is the total gross national product of all the countries in the world. This also equals the total gross domestic product. See measures of national income and output for more details. The per capita GWP in 2008 was approximately $10,500 US dollars (USD). The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC), in their Third Assessment Report (TAR), predicts a maximum per-capita gross world product in 2100 of approximately $140,000 (in year 2000 dollars). Sometimes term Gross Planetary Product (GPP) is also used for same concept.[

So 6.7 Billion multiplied by 10,500 dollars is the GPP (in dollars).
That's 70.35T (or $70,350,000,000,000 USD)
That's around $28.77 a day.

A mil is about the price of 95 years, then.

but wait, there's smore's:
There's this bit of economic data to wrap your head around-

"Although precise data is not available, the total household wealth in the world has been estimated at $125 trillion in year 2000. 90% of this wealth is held by people in North America, Europe, and high-income Asian countries, and 1% of adults are estimated to hold 40% of world wealth, a number which falls to 32% when adjusted for purchasing power parity.[4]"

So, I ask you, playing devil's advocate, what would you do with 130T dollars, lol?
What's 125T divided by 6.7B? 125,000/6.7=18,676 usd.

Changing the World vs. Changing the Self

I'm quite pleased with myself as I am
(for better or worse)

Here's a quote from the 12-step program entitled,
ACCEPTANCE

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, or situation- some fact of my life- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake. (Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober;) unless I accept life on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes."
-p.449 "Big Book"

Frankly, I will tell you straight up: I HATE this paragraph/quote. Loathe it, despise it, abominate it, execrate it, abhor..HATE IT.

Don't get me wrong: it is good to be serene. And if believing this is the only way for serenity, well so be it. BUT...

I will never accept the evil in this world. And neither should anyone. Acceptance is not the answer to anyone's problems. If you accept evil, you are evil. So just do a good turn daily, as the Scouting for boys program says. As long as "making a difference" is an acronym for M.A.D., I'll be insane in that sense til the day I die, unrepentant.

There is no God in the sense of an "owner of reality" from whom there are no mistakes. That is complete bullshit, and I think everyone with a sound mind should agree with me. I can only refer you to the photograph which I have posted earlier on my blog which scars the psyches of all who view it, link. You call that reality good?? Even God makes mistakes. I do. It's a big mess, and probably always will be, but that doesn't mean one shouldn't do one's utmost to make the best of any and all situations.

Fixing Africa (and all the rest) is a doable human achievement, you know.

God, whether (Reality/Nature/TheUniverse/Everything/Love/Me/You/Everyone..) is simply a way of making good of an indifferent, if not frankly malicious universe, as "the cards" may perhaps be, as dealed to You. So some hypnosis is in order, and we inherit beliefs that help us cope. I sure hope I/this blog can help you cope. It's helping me, I think.

Anyway, in the battle of changing yourself vs. the world, why not Both? Just like billiard balls, every contact changes the paths of both balls.

MIB stands for Men In Black, who deal with outer space aliens, just as the Universe itself can be considered Malicious, Indifferent, or Benevolent (through the will of these beings?)

Maybe there is an "owner of reality." I'm not buying it, lol. If it's anyone, I guess it's me. Must I buy my own bullshit? I don't own any bulls, and if I did I wouldn't value Michael Jordan's poo.
(sorry, that was uncalled for).

Oh, and Teshara anagrams to 'as earth', remember?

I realize I have a problem. I may not be schizophrenic according to the DSM IV sense any more, but i still have a bifurcated morality that says it is good to hate as well as love, which in common language might describe a schizophrenic (two-faced) perspective. But the hate comes from a place of love...the hate is subsumed, created by the love...maybe it really is all good, every cause has it's effect. Perhaps that picture will catalyze the global revolution!

My "revolution" is simply a happy life and basic needs met for all humanity, intelligently planned to be sustainable, too.

Anyway, I know evil exists, though -because murder can be a hobby, a twisted exercise for the sole purpose of sport, for fun -humans being just animals- the most dangerous game.
I'll stop now.

David Whyte's Poem

and Commentary, by yours truly

Poem
It doesn't interest me if there is one God or many gods. I want to know if you belong or feel abandoned. If you can know despair or see it in others.

I want to know if you are prepared to live in the world with its harsh need to change you. If you can look back with firm eyes saying, "This is where I stand."

I want to know if you know how to melt into that fierce heat of living falling toward the center of your longing.

If you are prepared to live, day by day, with the consequence of love and the bitter unwanted passion of your sure defeat.

I have heard, in that fierce embrace, even the gods speak of God.
--------------------------------

okay, my wife read this aloud, and it gelled a bit for me.
here's my take on the parts I didn't get at first (fierce heat of living, falling toward..,consequence of love and bitter/sure defeat)

there is both one God and many, it's the same thing: God is everything. The same love permeates all. I belong. I have abandoned others, but not in a too horrible way, I would say, and in the same way, others have abandoned me. I don't consider myself a magnetic personality, exactly. No matter, I value my solitude. I have missed being in more social environments like schools or workplaces. I wonder if I will be "well" enough soon to return. I can both see despair in others and know it myself. I CAN deal with a world's harsh need to change me: for example, to submit (my pride is not all-consuming, although I'll admit it's close). Falling toward the center of my longing... I have a longing for a better world, but I know from my own psychological genesis, that the dark side is here to stay, so to speak. Creation entails destruction, for example. Zealotry for good entails hatred of the bad. I know how to melt into the fierce heat of living -say a wild sexual life- but I'd rather just work quietly on my blog, a companion to Sara. I'm supposed to live a calm and tranquil life, not the life of Batman or whatever, lol. The consequences of love are vulnerability....sure defeat would be death, I imagine. A broken heart can be cruelly sad.

The "bitter unwanted passion of your sure defeat" refers to the fact that there will never be a perfect world, for either a utopian heavenly ideal of universal love or, conversely, a world of anarchy, without laws, where everyone enforces their own idea of justice (if these ideas even clash, actually, lol). Anyway, I'm right where I want to be, and I'll be defeated by time or tomorrow's headlines or some other disappointment, of course, in any case, and so it goes.

I'm not buying into this supposed fact that I have to embrace an unwanted passion of sure defeat as part of being in love. Love is sufficient. A dull, boring, everday, conversant, friendly, kindly, kind of love. "Passion" is the code word for Jesus on the cross, or people dying for a cause, or what truly makes people tick. I'm happy to know a little bit more each day, being a significant other, and entertaining the possibility that my simple pleasures might actually not have to ever end. I'm 38, I plan to become stronger and more fit, and maybe have (a kid/kids) in the not too distant future. That's good enough for me. Life has it's drama, comedy and tragedy alike, sometimes in unequal measure. I, too, am a god who believes in God. (I'll let you wonder what I mean by that :-)

Wherever I Go

There I am

I am a turtle. I AM my own home. I occupy myself.

I am sane.
My home was San Francisco. Now I live in San Ity. Sane City.
I have the sanity of a manatee.
If I ever swim in a European river, I might be In the Seine.

Yeah, whatever, nevermind. Thanks for the meme, Kurt.
Justice, just ice?

But, seriously folks. I'm not insane. That's a legal category.
Mentally ill? I'm diagnosed (with/as having) schizo-affective disorder.
That means I am (that is to say, occasionally am, I guess) psychotic.

What's my Psychosis/psychoses?

a mental disorder characterized by symptoms, such as delusions or hallucinations, that indicate impaired contact with reality. any severe form of mental disorder, as schizophrenia or paranoia.

Not in touch with reality. Maybe I'm in touch with Reality, lol.

I have an occasional voice in my head. It's going away. The madness, I hope, is receding.
There's a lot to be mad at, of course. But I guess I'll happily do my thing, even as the world seems mired in a world of shit, and that's the only way of sanity, all cheerfully jesus loving and shit. Seriously, though, fuck you David, you sick fuck. From now on, stop talking to me, alright?

Excuse my french.

Aggressive v. Respectful Atheism

Here's a link to an article i found on npr today: link

It's weird, but everybody's right.

The highly religious can be integrated into the highly atheist, if you try hard enough (we're talking about the same reality, after all).

Everybody is their own G/g od , even if they hypnotize themselves that god is an (External) higher power.

Furthermore, I've come to see that consciousness pervades everything, and we call that everything God. The Universe, consciousness bestowed-on, is God. We can call this universe indifferent, or we can program it to be beneficial or loving or what have you. Likewise, any small piece of which, from ourselves to a grain of sand or something, can be considered a microcosm of that greater reality, because space is something that a mathematical bent of mind can easily view as being both finite and infinite.

Sarah Silverman on feeding the hungry

Here's the excerpt from the article about Sarah Silverman's attempt at comedy regarding the Vatican selling all it's property/holdings to feed the poor.

"the "Catholic Church operates more hospitals and feeds more of the poor than any private institution in the world."

Yet the Rev. James Martin, culture editor of the Jesuit magazine America, says Silverman may be onto something. In an online article, Martin noted that Jesus himself told his followers to sell what they had and give it to the poor.

"Of course Pope Benedict XVI could not 'sell' any of the treasures of the Vatican, the same way that your local archbishop couldn't sell off the cathedral at a whim; they are not his, they are the church's," Martin wrote. "And the church is not simply the hierarchy but the entire people of God."

he added: "Still, perhaps Ms. Silverman, in her postmodern, potty-mouthed way is on to something. Like Jesus was. Sell the Vatican? Well, maybe not everything but perhaps a statue or two?"

For the record, the U.N. Food and Agriculture Organization, which just released its annual report on the state of world hunger, says global food output will have to increase by 70 percent to feed a projected population of 9.1 billion in 2050.

To achieve that, poor countries will need $44 billion in annual agricultural aid, compared with the current $7.9 billion, the Rome-based FAO said. Overall, an annual net investment in agriculture of $83 billion is needed to feed the world.

Even if the pope were to sell the Vatican, it wouldn't be enough.

In 2004, the Vatican disclosed that the Holy See's real estate was worth 700 million euros, or about $908 million at the time. That doesn't include St. Peter's Basilica and the Sistine Chapel, which the Vatican termed priceless and valued at a symbolic 1 euro.

It would fetch a pretty penny, lol. How many pretty pennies are there in 1 euro?

I have to admit that the above statistics don't make sense to me or sit well with me. I don't believe a global population of 3 billion MORE people (from the 6ish or so now) would require 70% more output. In fact, with the amount of waste, I wonder if the 3B could be fed on current expenditure. If humanity were to go vegetarian, for example, how much would THAT save? Or, if seaweed, and peanut butter or what have you...inexpensive diets can be designed to meet the nutritional requirements of the world, no? If all the american land that was devoted to front lawns, for example, or the lack of -such as the japanese- modern urban gardening, were switched to food, that would help a bunch. Is the Vatican buying into these stats, or what? 70% more output, REALLY?? How hard might this be, with modified seeds and advanced biology, etc. Also, does the church have a better view of 2050 than anyone else? They have the Holy See, after all, whatever that is.

Ugh

Well, my chief angel up here in heaven let me down a bit, you could say

I feel numb and malicious. Dull, like the gray day, and seriously whatever to anything, except the continuing stupidity and madness of all the shit around me, which I occasionally pipe up to put a word of protest in to restore some sanity to this occasional shithole of worthlessness.

So it goes, as they say.

Well, whatever. Life goes on.
I have to be up at 5:30am tomorrow morning, for my 2 hour and 20 minute ride to Vallejo. What if God was one of us, just a stranger on a bus...

Goodnite, and lots of nightmares or sweet dreams or whatever the hell you're inclined to enjoy more.

Zzz, Sleep Well

Not too much and Not too little, but Just Right

I think everyone should wake up rested and refreshed, naturally, every day. Like to the cock's crow or whatever, say sunshine beaming on your face, not some crazy alarm clock that you smack to death every morning, possibly in the midst of a really interesting dream.

Anyway, according to the National Sleep Foundation, only about half of adults in the U.S. get a good night's sleep every night. Lost sleep links to poor work perfomrance, auto accidents, relationship difficulties, and anger/depression.

Maybe you only need 5 hours, and you think you need 9 or something. Seriously.

Good God is Good Love

Healthy Love vs. Addictive Love
Relationship Assessment
(with god, others, a significant other, yourself, or whatever)

If God is Love, God can be Addictive or God can be, on the other hand, well, Healthy.

Healthy Love
-allows for individuality, energizes
-experiences and enjoys both oneness with and separateness from partner
-brings out the best qualities in both partners
-accepts endings
-experiences openness to change, exploration
-invites growth in both partners
-experiences deep intimacy
-experiences freedom to ask honestly for what is wanted
-experiences giving and receiving as one, the giving is conditional same
-does not attempt to change or control the partner
-encourages self-sufficiency of partner
-accepts limitations of self and partner
-does not insist on unconditional love/ is unconditional love
-can make and honor commitments, anti-dependency
-has high self esteem and sense of well-being
-trust memory of beloved; enjoys solitude
-expresses feelings spontaneously
-welcomes closeness, risks vulnerability
-cares, but can remain detatched
-affirms equality, personal power of self, partner

Addictive Love (are you addicted to God?)
-Feels all consuming or energy draining
-difficulty defining ego boundaries
-has elements of sadomasochism
-fears letting go
-fears risk, change, the unknown
-allows little individual growth
-lacks deep intimacy
-manipulates to get needs met
-gives to get something back
-attempts to change or control the partner
-needs partner to feel complete
-seeks solution outside of self
-demands and expects unconditional love
-refuses or abuses commitment
-looks to partner for affirmation, worth
-fears abandonment upon routine separation
-re-creates familiar negative feelings
-desires, yet fears, closeness
-attempts to "take care" of partners feelings
-plays power games ("one upmanship")

this is from a worksheet that has you tally 0 for never, 1 for rarely, 2 for sometimes, 3 for often, 4 for almost always, and 5 for always, so you can score yourself.

Are you an addict?
You might as well face it, you're addicted to love.
Maybe everyone should go through the breakdown on love, instead of simply saying Love, love, love...make love not war, or whatever. Dig a little deeper.

Some POW's

Pearls of Wisdom, that is

On Time, and carpe diem (seize the day)

Imagine there is a bank that credits your account each morning with 86,400 dollars. It carries over no balance from day to day. Every evening deletes whatever balance went unspent. What would you do?
You'd draw out every penny, of course.

Each of us has such a bank, it's name is TIME

Every morning, you have 86,400 seconds to "spend".

You must live in the present on today's deposits. You should invest it so as to get the utmost in health, happiness, and success. The clock is running. Make the most of Today.

Remember, time waits for no one.
Yesterday is history
tomorrow is a mystery
today is a gift, that's why it's called the Present.

To realize the value of one millisecond, ask the person who won the silver and not the gold at the Olympics.

Y&T

Rock On!

Actually, this is a poem entitled 'Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow'

There are two days in every week about which we should not worry, two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.

One of these days is Yesterday with it mistakes and cares, it's faults and blunders, its aches and pains. Yesterday has passed foreer beyond our control.

All the mony in the wolrd cannot bring nack yesterday. We cannot undo a single act we performed, we canot erase a sing word we said. Yesterday is gone.

The other day we should not worry about is Tomorrow with its possible adversaries, its burdens, its large and poor perfomrance. Tomorrow is also beyon our immediate control.

Tomorrow's sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds-but it will rise. Until it does, we have not stake in Tomorrow, for it is as yuet unborn.

This leaves only one day...Today. Any person can fight the battle of just one day. It is only when you and I add the Y esterday and Tomorrow taht we break down.

It is not the experience of Today that drives people mad-it is remores or bitterness for something which happened Yesterday and the dread of what Tomorrow may bring.

Let us, therefor, live but one day at a time.

Boo! Duh. Happy Halloween.

I'm changing into a fat chub-chub for Halloween.

I weigh 225 pounds, the most I've ever been. Rub my Buddha belly, y'all.

Seriously, I need to exercise and watch the intake frequency and quantity and quality.

I'm reading about the Soka Gokkai thing, and I'd say it's not half-bad.
Except for the part about how easy it seems to be to get enlightened paired with the phrase if you meet the buddha, kill the buddha. That reminds me of the christian thing about being christlike, which would seem to entail self-sacrifice. I'm all about the (vulcan, is it) live long and prosper! I love life, and hope to enjoy lots of it.

I need to lose weight. I've got a lot of it in the worst area, my belly. I like sweets. I've got 4 cavities. Geez, louise. I've had "death by chocolate" ice cream, and I've heard of phrases like "sickly sweet" and "killing with kindness." I'm not sure what to make of it all.

Kyo

"sound" (or teaching)

Should we consider all sound as something instructive?

Again with the nmrk (Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo). Kyo is the lotus-sutra's title, and "the language of the Buddha" It's "the ultimate invocation of life" Simply by chanting, we experience the energy and wisdom to make our lives fulfilled.

Our prayers are communicated into the depths of our being through the chant/when we invoke the sound of the mystic law. We "bring forth" from within ourselves.

It says "the only issue is whether we can create value in our lives and help others do the same."
We seek to fulfill our desires, and resolve our conflicts.

Peace, out.
Nam-myoho-renge-kyo!

Renge

This means lotus blossom in sanskrit, I believe

It encapsulates the reality of the mystic law, because it represents

-the dynamic of flow (nothing stays the same). (a lotus blossom is located in water)

-this particular flower seeds and blooms at the same time, representing the simultanaity of cause and effect. (causes are TWA: thoughts, words, and actions, which set the stage for when the time comes later in the right environmental circumstances to manifest the reality of these twa's) "Each cause registers an effect in the depths of life."

-out from the muck and mire, the lotus blossom produces beauty. loveliness.
(boy, you can say that again) Let's hear it for Blossom (and bubbles, and buttercup)

It's this last part of it that stands out primarily to me. I see a lot of potential in A LOT of muck and mire.

ANyway, NMRK. The SGI would remind you that the ENTIRE phrase holds the key. "Chanting nam-myoho-renge-kyo is the deepest cause we can make in order to achieve our desired effect"
(It's Nichiren Daishonin's version of Jesus's Our Father)

Myoho

Mystic Law

The nam-myoho-renge-kyo statement, refrain, chant, whatever IS the mystic law. Life gets better when you tune into the SGI wavelength, no? (if that's what's happening)

The mystic law is a mysterious mystery of mysticism, lol. It's ineffable, incomprehensible. "The mind cannot comprehend, and words cannot possibly express.." Life transcends concepts of existence or nonexistence, it says. It is the Middle Way that is the ultimate reality.

This sounds right, I have to say. Humans can be zombie-ish, and a piece of art, for example, can come alive. It's the whole vampire thing, and being drained vs. Ful-filled?

myo is the mystic nature of life
ho is it's manifestations

Nam

Nam means devotion

"By devoting our lives to this law (myoho) through our faith, practice, and study, we will awaken the life-condition of Buddha, or enlightenment, inside ourselves.

NMRK
(Nam-myoho-renge-kyo)

Sara and I actually own an SGI Gohonzon..

-nam is the shortened form of Namu.

Nichiren Daishonin Buddhism

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

This phrase, or mantra, is what governs life eternally throughout the universe. Say it a couple times, let it sink in. Feel better?

You're supposed to.

The Soka Gokkai International promote this form of Buddhism, and I was introduced to it while incarcerated.

NMRK (or Nam-myoho-renge-kyo) stands for devotion, mystic law, lotus blossom, sound. The phrase itself IS the mystic law. Kinda bizarre and cool, huh?

Sara was into it for a couple months of her life, awhile back, and our house has a shrine, containing the scroll with the mantra and some other wow (words of wisdom) in it (incomprehensible, however, in sanskrit or chinese or whatever).

It's possibly the world's most simple religion. I like that.

It's all about having a winning life (like life is a competition). Whatever. But still, the introductory pamphlet describes having the power to face and surmount our deepest problems.

Life can beat you down, so I suppose you have to beat down life in return, to be/stay on top.

The pamphlet promises an inner transformation, requiring a basic change in our hearts and character- an inner revolution of freedom, happiness, and harmony with others.

You know, I just saw a music video of Michael Jackson yesterday, and I was amazed at his glow of absolute happiness, during the video, as his body pulsed freely and intensely to the track. It was intense what that guy could project. I was blown away. I guess this kind of thing might be what the SGI is talking about.

I was swimming in Michael Jackson's water, and I felt buoyed.

I say that because this funky religion makes no distinction between a person and his/her environment. (One is the source for the other, for better or worse)

This Buddhist form doesn't espouse an eradication of desires. Instead, you're supposed, through faith, to "magnetize" your dream(s) toward yourself. Receiving your desires is described as having "rocket fuel" toward your enlightenment, in which you become a Buddha, or share in Buddhahood.

Buddhism, it says, is the practice that allows us to access the traits that allow us to tackle every problem or challenge that confronts us, and win.

See, religion is kind of like football, lol.

Nam-myoho-renge-kyo
Peace!

Hi, World

Well, I'm back from a brief hiatus.

Upon briefly reviewing some of my more recent posts, I see how I've been a bit loony, you might say (or at least came off that way). I'm in the process of working on that, and rejoining the rational in the land of logic and eloquence.

I'm on really good medications, and socializing daily with really good people, so my Godliness can take a form less rude, crude, and unacceptable. 137! lol.

Seriously, my madness is receding, as Pink Floyd might say, and I'm able to tolerate what I formerly would call the evilness of television.

Some Native American Wisdom

With commentary

http://www.infoplease.com/spot/native-american-proverbs-wisdom.html

regarding quotes, it's pick and choose.
if you believe it, it's the truth (for you),
until critical thinking or another quote comes along.

-Don't be afraid to cry. It will free your mind of sorrowful thoughts. - Hopi. I agree with this. Get it all out, and be done with it.

on crying
Babies can cry whenever they want because they can't talk. People cry for sadness, grief, happiness, pain, and acting/crocodile tears...often to manipulate (or if there's something in their eye). Did I miss anything? Issues should be resolved, and I agree people should cry as little as possible, even if that means crying nonstop for a week, and drinking water just to refill your glass. Being a wreck for awhile is acceptable, til you can get your feces together. Maybe that's not the best advice.

It is better to have less thunder in the mouth and more lightning in the hand. - Apache.
That's the same as our quote, walk softly but carry a big stick.

Immortality (or another generation, anyway)
They are not dead who live in the hearts they leave behind. - Tuscarora
-this quote gives life to the Tuscarora, as a matter of fact (I'd never heard of them b4).

If we wonder often, the gift of knowledge will come. - Arapaho
lifelong learning is answering the questions of your youth finally as you age. I have quite a backlog, myself. I love the internet. For instance, I wondered about seedless watermelons.

listen all y'all it's sabotauge:
The weakness of the enemy makes our strength. - Cherokee
The art of war is deception, don't forget, too. That's the hardcore shit.

Force, no matter how concealed, begets resistance. - Lakota
For no resistance, use no force, then, right? Jedi police be damned.

He who would do great things should not attempt them all alone. - Seneca
Yes WE can. You and me and Barack make three.

A brave man dies but once, a coward many times. - Iowa
It takes a mightily brave man to die repeatedly, however, I would add.
Born again?

Jesus in space?

quote on time-travel from Wikipedia:

There are various ways in which a person could "travel into the future" in a limited sense: the person could set things up so that in a small amount of his own subjective time, a large amount of subjective time has passed for other people on Earth. For example, an observer might take a trip away from the Earth and back at relativistic velocities, with the trip only lasting a few years according to the observer's own clocks, and return to find that thousands of years had passed on Earth. It should be noted, though, that according to relativity there is no objective answer to the question of how much time "really" passed during the trip; it would be equally valid to say that the trip had lasted only a few years or that the trip had lasted thousands of years, depending on your choice of reference frame.

I bet you're thinking that Jesus did this.

How to be God like Me

1. Be Good
a. Don't do anything bad
b. Do all you can for good.
c. How do you defeat evil without becoming evil?
d. How do you define, for yourself, good and evil.
2. Be Happy.
Make being good a part of being happy.
Love one another.
3. Be Alive. Die fulfilled.
Don't be a zombie. Have a zest for life.
Read everything. Do everything you want to in life.
Maybe have a purpose in life. Pick a cause and go all the way with it.
4. Read my blog. Write your own. Stay positive.
5. Write the pope a note. I think I'll do that, one of these days.
The pope died after I wrote him a complaint about the source of my condition, last time.
6. Action speaks louder than words. Do a good turn daily.
7. Maybe be a bit mad. Maintain a curiosity about everything.
8. Talk to the JW's every time they stop by.

Attempt to be a Renaissance (wo)man.
And a polymath.
Did you know that Leonardo Da Vinci was a left-handed homosexual?
And something else, too.
Deciduous comes from 'to decide'. Jesus dried up a fig-tree.
Who decided?

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore God is.
I am God, I think. God thinks.
God is love. Love thinks. Love stinks.
Catholic perfume. cat prr.

Jitterbug perfume, by the writer of that book set in Alaska I read (pronounced red) recommended by Tiffany (who I did not have Breakfast with, although I asked) at Aquarius next to Cafe Roma next to the Mcdonald's owned burrito place next to Bogey's books (whose name I always forgot, except I knew it had something to do with jet fighters), where I looked for theater literature on how to completely change one's appearance so I could look completely altered for Halloween, or make myself useful undercover.

Hitler is said to hate Kanye West. You can't believe everything you read. But I can. Hitler would have ordered a hit on Ler, if he were jewish. Larry, lair, me. I approve of the right for Kanye to make himself center stage, but not the propriety. Is law just a matter of manners set into code by ethical/moral tyrants? Is South Park an important show in any way for developing The South (I read that book in college). Barack called him a 'jackass'. black on black dissing. God, the devil, and Bob. I knew a Bob at Davis who studied physics. He took extra time to take tests, as well as in bowling. I think rules are good for shaping people's opinions, but Kanye may have read my blog, and is now dreaming of a life in heaven with gay fish (!), because he's taking a break to rethink things. The pussycat dolls were on my mind recently, and now I'm thinking about collective unconscious and movies that either give insight into a predestined future or try to alter a future nightmare that someone may have dreamed. Books and movies are waking dreams. One man's nightmare is another man's wet dream.

Go, Manuel Marquez. Abas con insulting tv commentator.
The shorter the fight, the more Coke the U.S. should donate to every man, woman, and child in Mexico. And a free dental visit. Raise the poor by ever so slightly lowering the rich. Make the entire planet a democracy, 1 person, 1 vote, and let the madness of social and mind control run willy nilly, in a world without guns.

American Vice

I saw this link from stumbleupon.
Check this out.

Send the priests to these areas, stat!
Give school libraries copies of Bill Bennett's Book (the book of virtues)!
Airlift massive amounts of condoms to the Southeast!

9lbs, 9oz on 9/9/09

wow. A baby was born. Henry Michael Berendes. 7, 6, 9= 4

9 to 5. My blog should have loaded at 4:14, too, but I had to start over after the page shaded white. We live in a weird world.

Whoa. I got that wrong. 9 to 7. It appears this baby boy was also born by Cesarean (capitalized?) at 9:09a.m. (and how many seconds? lol)

link

It was good for a laugh. Maybe more?

What's a Kaprekar number?


The number you entered was 09999999.
Congratulations! You have found an extremely cool number! It has a Universal Coolness Index of 99.52%

09999999 contains a 7-of-a-kind together. Only 0.00018% of 8-digit numbers have this combination.

09999999 has 2 unique digits. In 0.011% of 8-digit numbers, there are 2 or fewer unique digits.

09999999's digits sum to 63. In 0.024% of 8-digit numbers, the digits sum to at least 63.

All of the digits in 09999999 are multiples of 3. Only 0.070% of 8-digit numbers have this property.

link

Liberation, Libation, and Libration!

I studied libration on Wikipedia, and celebrated my liberation from it's definition with a libation.

Coming up with stuff like this makes me happy, in a small way.

At the top, and Turritopsis

immortal God

quote
I'm not an atheist and I don't think I can call myself a pantheist. We are in the position of a little child entering a huge library filled with books in many different languages. The child knows someone must have written those books. It does not know how. The child dimly suspects a mysterious order in the arrangement of the books but doesn't know what it is. That, it seems to me, is the attitude of even the most intelligent human being toward God.
Albert Einstein

aside
If we are all vehicles, then I guess every book in every library was written by God, kind of like how they say the bible was the inspired word of the Big G. Wow, even me, right now. Ahem.

Here's an interesting thing I ran across: Turritopsis Nutricula.
Check it out......(It's Immortal!)

More Religious Weirdness

Sarai, Sara, Serah, Asher, Israel....whatever?

The Columbia Encyclopedia is pleasantly concise (said to only be one or two volumes offline), and free online, thus giving me hope I might finish reading some version of an Encyclopedia in my lifetime. I think I'd like that.

Anyway, I plugged in my wife's name, Sara
and got:
Sara or Sarah,in the Bible, wife of Abraham and mother of Isaac. With Rebekah, Rachel, and Leah, she was one of the four Hebrew matriarchs. Her name was originally Sarai [Heb.,=princess]. She was childless until, by divine favor, she gave birth to Isaac in her old age. After his birth, jealous of her handmaid Hagar, who was Abraham's concubine, she drove Hagar and her son Ishmael into the desert to die. Sarah is said to have died in Hebron and to have been buried in the cave of Machpelah. The Sarah in the Book of Numbers is the same as Serah. Her number is 6.
-but you knew that already

moving on, I plug in Serah, and get:
Serah (sē'ru), in the Bible, daughter of Asher. It is also spelled Sarah.
Serah and Asher use the same letters. okay, I didn't know that, and I kind of imagine it really doesn't matter to anyone, anyway.

But, I had to:
Asher
Asher (ăsh'ur)[Heb.,=happy], in the Bible, tribe of Israel. Its eponym was Jacob's eighth son. It occupied the northwestern part of ancient Palestine, and its position laid Asher open to influence from other nations and attacks by them. It seems to have become insignificant early in Jewish history. The name occurs in Egyptian inscriptions. An alternate spelling is Aser.

Wow, the tribe of Israel became insignificant early in Jewish history? Then, why did they name their country after them? Like I said, it should go back to being Palestine, or Palrael, or Israstine, or something. Have a contest for a new name. The encyclopedia can be kind of fun.

Sara could be as Ra, that's Egyptian.
Sarah could be my wife in her black Honda (k sirah sirah) (sp?)
or hey little sister shotgun, or hey little sister don't shed no tear, no woman no cry.
syrah wine is good, like sir AH (anthony hopkins)
book of numbers: wouldn't that be as simple as 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10 (or 0 through 9)
lol
Asher? I know something about ASH. Main Element is as H, hydrogen.
I like that I'm married to a queen, daughter of happiness.
Which brings me to what I found on OCW (open courseware) from Berkeley for now, the Fall semester: a class on Happiness.

What does Columbia say about Jesse?
Jesse (jes'ē), in the Bible, the descendant of Rahab, the grandson of Boaz and Ruth, and the father of David. Referring to the restoration of the Davidic monarchy, the Book of Isaiah speaks of a shoot coming from the “stump of Jesse.” The “root” of Jesse is the Davidic monarch of the eschatological age.

this makes me think of captain Ahab, baby Ruth, and ruthless. Ruth is hurt, rearranged.
what's this about eschatological (is that about poop? no, that's scatological) but scat is a jazzy thing, though. argh, whatever, I dunno.
okay, eschatology:
Pronunciation: (es"ku-tol'u-jē),—n. Theol. 1. any system of doctrines concerning last, or final, matters, as death, the Judgment, the future state, etc. 2. the branch of theology dealing with such matters.

egads. is this why people are obsessed about 2012 or being in the end times? ME? Little ol' me?? I'll be 41. That's quite a thing to ponder. What a bunch of hogwash is my reaction. Death and final matters concerning hog poop. Just like the Hannibal movie. Hannibal Lecter has a stump, last we know. Nuts. From the giving tree. I don't exactly feel like a Davidic Monarch, except that there's a David in my head. None but ourselves can free our mind, Bob Marley sings. We have one mind, apparently. The hive mind sometimes gets stung. Shocking.

Prayers

3 poems elicited by my wife for my new year,
of 38 years.

Love's Philosophy by: Percy Bysshe Shelley

The fountains mingle with the river,
And the rivers with the ocean;
The winds of heaven mix forever
With a sweet emotion;
Nothing in the world is single;
All things by a law divineIn another's being mingle--
Why not I with thine?

See, the mountains kiss high heaven,
And the waves clasp one another;
No sister flower could be forgiven
If it disdained its brother;
And the sunlight clasps the earth,
And the moonbeams kiss the sea;
--What are all these kissings worth,
If thou kiss not me?

I don't know what the exclusionary principle is, but it sounds like it could be behind some resentment related to the heart of this romantic poem.

Our father
Our father who art in heaven hallowed be thy name
thy kingdom come, thy will be done
on earth as it is in heaven
give us this day our daily bread
and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us
and lead us not into temptation
but deliver us from evil.
amen.

hail mary
Hail mary full of grace the lord is with thee
blessed art thou amongst women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb jesus
holy mary mother of god pray for us sinners
now and at the hour of our death, amen.

I met a devotee of Adi Da today, who told me their recently deceased guru leader's book -the Aletheon- sells for 270 dollars or something. I told her it should be available for free online so it can become a sensation and have a real chance at changing the world. Get people talking about it, allow the spiritual buzz to happen over the widest area possible. My wife cut my hair yesterday, speaking of buzzes. As I was talking to her, a small snake was sighted on the FLOOR of the STORE. She warned me it might be a baby rattlesnake, and I kind of think it was, but it could have also been a small gopher snake -in any case, i put it in a bag and dumped it over the fence next to the store, to the acclaim of the 4 or 5 people in the store at the time. Most people think what I did was actually kind of stupid, but I wasn't afraid of it.

Prayers for the preyers

The Urge to Punish

Mistrust those in whom the urge to punish is strong." -Friedrich Nietzsche
(the question is, do you trust Nietsche?)

or, as The Tudors, on video, which I've been watching lately, says, should you
"Trust No One". All this sneaky, Machiavellian, jousting for power, and to get leverage
anyway,

1. Hell is imagined to be eternal torment. That's not love. That's a terrorist threat. I think any preacher who believes in hell and screams or darkly growls at his/her congregation to straighten up OR ELSE is playing a card out of the free speech deck that I feel is cruel and unusual punishment, to boot. (I read Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God in high school, SHAG :-)

Still, I think anybody should be able to say anything.
It could be entertaining to be preached to by someone like this, but I think it is irresponsible, mostly, by some shmuk who gets off on intimidating people and feeling superior.

2. Punishers live by codes. Like bushido or something. Say, the law. Or their moral compasses from their upbringing, from school, parents, priests. Hanging out with the 'wrong' crowd. Whatever. Everybody has a code. Everybody has their own sense of right and wrong. Even the psychos have them. They've been wronged. Even sadists, I'm sure, feel they are righting the wrongs in the universe. Soldiers and police officers are scary. And the s&m crowd is too, I imagine. Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? The shadow knows. ha.

I found a "church of the universe" that's mainly all about pot and nudity. That sounds about right, lol.

What's UP? the Urge to Punish
also, I think the military's developing a microwave weapon is child abuse. Those military folk can go to hell. And they do. (war is hell -gen. Sherman) What would happen if nobody showed up for battle? I'm perseverating. Sorry.

In a lawless, uncivilized world of might makes right and whatever thrill killers that might arise, I imagine violence, mayhem, panic, pain, fear, and death would run rampant. All that resentment, anger, and just plain bloodlust that might rear it's ugly head. It's only natural. Frickin' bullies.

And ultimately, it's bleached bones in an indifferent universe. Don't worry, be happy.

Happy Birthday to Me!

God turns 38

-wikipedia and rotten have historical reviews, each day.

-I'm 38. That's like ch-ch-ch-ch-changes. -David Bowie
(c is the 3rd letter and h is the 8th)
church is very 38ish.

Sara and I went for a walk this morning, had breakfast at Sarafornia, and a nice dinner is planned with her mom visiting from Auburn (her house didn't burn down, if you were wondering) (Her dad's house came close, though).

Speaking of danger, I hope I don't catch swine flu, which a presidential panel fears will kill 90,000 people (and hit nearly half the entire poplulation of the U.S... Is this the same as the bird flu? H5N1? the regular flu? How many shots do I need? I already get a shot so I don't lose my shit as God and all, lol. Anyway, good luck, lords. Get it, Life OR Death? Scary) 90k is more than double the death count from an ordinary flu season.

2 years from 40. My dad called and said I was getting closer to his age, ha (44).
My mom also called and said she plans to help Vets and something else...I forgot, ugh.
Anyway, dinner's going to be awesome, with skirt steak, and spinach, and potatoes au gratin, and ice cream and coke (the beverage). O happy day.

Btw, the youngest father recorded was aged...8. youngest mother, 5. both from China.
If I had a child every year since I was 8, I'd have 30 children.

wikipedia on 9-3 (this date in history)
September 3: Ghost Festival in the Chinese calendar (2009); Independence Day in Qatar; Flag Day in Australia; Armed Forces Day in Taiwan

301 – San Marino, one of the smallest nations in the world and the world's oldest republic still in existence, was founded by Saint Marinus.
590 – Gregory I became pope, the first one to come from a monastic background.
1260 – Egyptian Mamluks defeated the Mongols at the Battle of Ain Jalut in Palestine.
1783 – Great Britain and the United States signed the Treaty of Paris, formally ending the American Revolutionary War.
1901 – The National Flag of Australia, a Blue Ensign defaced with the Commonwealth Star and the Southern Cross, flew for the first time atop the Royal Exhibition Building (pictured) in Melbourne.

okay, the name of the guy who became pope in 590 has my brother's name
and
the egyptian (pegyt..) mamluks defeated the mongols in Palestine on my sat score.

it's my birthday, humor me. Of course everything revolves around me, lol.
The rotten site seems to be stuck in December.

Here's history from infoplease:
1189
Richard I (the Lion-Hearted) was crowned king of England at Westminster Abbey.
1658
Oliver Cromwell, the lord protector of England, died.
1783
The Treaty of Paris officially ended the Revolutionary War between the United States and Great Britain.
1939
Great Britain and France declared war on Germany during World War II.
1967
Nguyen Van Thieu was elected president of South Vietnam.
1974
Frank Robinson was named the first African-American manager in major league baseball.
1976
The unmanned U.S. spacecraft Viking II landed on Mars and took the first pictures of the planet's surface.
1978
Pope John Paul I was installed as the 264th pontiff of the Roman Catholic Church.

Time and again

Apparently, there are different kinds of time.
No time, no time, I got got got got no time (cool song by The Guess Who)
I'm not talking past, present, future, or an eternal now or whatever.

but this:
-my wormtongue parseltongue is time breaks down to 'that is me'
is it you? U2? your time? is it past your time? south park's Tim-may!
all good things to those who wait- in time, in time, my child
-good times? what's your favorite time? (4:20?)
there is a time for every purpose under heaven...
in that case, Can I designate 6:30AM as the time to start
combatting poverty and disease and creating better quality of living around the world?

there's solar, lunar, gregorian, greenwich mean, etc.
there's daylight savings time, real time, lent and ordinary time, AND

I've just discovered there's linear, polynomial, discrete, and subquadratic times. I have no clue what these are.

There are body biorhythms, and what I suspect are subjective senses of time,
affected by food, drugs, fight or flight, etc. Creatures with short lifespans may experience time like we do, in the sense that their "moments" are equal to ours. I mean a fly that lives a week might just be living the equivalent of 10 years in every day, psychologically.

My time is down. I don't really want my time to be up.

As the guy on tv who wears clocks and formerly belonged to fear of a black planet or menace ii society or whatever, I ask 'do you know what time it is? It's time to get ill, I think.

i yield my time to the gentleman from Chicago.

I think there may be a time machine
Of course, the entire field/discipline/practice of history and people telling stories about yesterday or whatever is a kind of time machine. People who make the future can always pretend to say they've seen it, too. (So maybe Morpheus is like Bill Gates). Alright, Gods, I'm out. time out, like timetables in spacetime. Peace.

Girls just want to have fun, time after time. -Cyndi Lauper

Meditation (post 11)

This goes up to eleven! -Spinal Tap

review of 6 cards: A thing of beauty, Go to the light, Patience, Reading, Forgiveness, Acceptance

A THING OF BEAUTY
pick a beautiful object, any object
-meditate/breathe
-notice everything about it
-now, close your eyes and visualize it in as much detail as you can
-open eyes, compare images
-notice what you missed, and (lather, rinse, repeat)
-see how much you improve with each repetition

GO TO THE LIGHT
-light a candle
-med/deep breathe (for a few minutes)
-open your eyes and focus on the candle
-notice height, width, color of flame
-visualize the flame inside your body (ouch!) burning away doubts, fears, insecurities
-with eyes open and focused on the flame, meditate a few minutes more
-when u r finished, blow out the candle, imagining you are blowing out your problems.

PATIENCE
helpful exercise for when it will be tested
-think of an ongoing problem where you lose your patience (person, object, home, work)
-what's your normal response? does it improve the situation, or not?
-what are the shortterm and longterm fx of your response, for you/others
-imagine an alternate, patient response, e.g.
instead of lashing out, inhale deeply and exhale loudly making a whooshing noise.
-the exhale whoosh is getting rid of all the negativity :-)
-if the noise feels inappropriate, breathe deep without the sound.

READING
Contemplation is a type of meditation where you focus on a piece of writing, like my blog, or the koran, or the bible, or People magazine.
-find a favorite book (like a dictionary?)
-do a few minutes of med/deep breathing
-without looking, open the book
-again without looking, place your finger somewhere on the page
(this is called bibliomancy)
-read where your finger lands
-think about the meaning in the context of your current life situation
(everything relates to everything else, I think)
-if you receive any insights, use them during the day

FORGIVENESS
If you'd like to ask for from someone, but can't talk to them, try this:
-meditate/deep breathe
-imagine yourself in your sanctuary with you higher or wise self
-ask if it's an appropriate time to talk to the other's higher self
-if appropriate for both, invite this other's higher self into your sanctuary
-imagine both surrounded in light and love
-mentally ask the other for forgiveness, tell them how you really feel, and why you feel regret
-notice if there are any changes in the other person, and ask if anything else needs to be said.
-write your experiences, if you wish.

ACCEPTANCE
this does not mean passive resignation. This exercise is designed to make acceptance into an active, creative process.
-sit comfortably and close your eyes
-think about an event in your life that was difficult to accept
-what can you learn about what you truly want in life from that event
-refocus your energy on what you want, as clearly as possible (a picture should be your goal)
-without trying to force yourself to feel differently about the difficult event, explore whether you can see it as an opportunity to strengthen your commitment to what you want.
-come back slowly

Meditation (post 10)

Some biggies (important meditation topics)
or, in other words, important for getting your sh-- together.

They are: Compassion, A Fork in the road, Freeing yourself, Staying grounded, and Let it be

Compassion
you could interpret this in slytherin parseltongue as cum passion or as compass ion..
anyway,
card says here, "Compassion is on of the great creative forces in human relationships" and that this is an exercise in both giving and receiving it.
-begin with a few moments of meditation and deep breathing
-think of times when you've given, as well as received, compassion.
-focus on a "master of compassion", like someone you know, or someone like the lama doll's eye (ha). See yourself as a master of kindness, and imagine yourself interacting with people that you both know and don't.
-imagine receiving compassion from a master. Allow yourself to truly accept the offered kindness.
-gradually return and open your eyes.

A Fork in the Road
this should help if you're trying to decide b/w two separate courses of action..
-do a few minutes of meditation, deep breathing
-with eyes closed, imagine a symbol for each
-imagine the symbols, 1 in each hand
-visualize each course of action as fully as possible
-slowly bring your hands together and clasp them, melding each course of action into the other.
-notice if a new symbol forms, or if you have any insights about a third way of approaching this problem.

Freeing Yourself
everyone sometimes feels trapped in certain situations..
-write about what you are learning from this situation,
in what ways are you growing stronger,
and what positive qualities are you learning?
-med/breathing
-imagine you are in a box. how big is it. what are the walls made of, how thick?
-add doors and windows to feel more comfortable
-visualize breaking down the walls so you can get where you want to be. imagine tools if necessary.
-write about the experience.

Staying Grounded
For when you feel scattered or pulled in every direction..
-brief breathing exercise
-imagine roots coming out of the bottoms of your feet, connecting you to the earth's core
-imagine pulling nutrients and water out of the soil, as well as pulling in the solidity and stability of the earth.
-imagine branches growing out of you, into the sky, pulling light and oxgen into every cell in your body.
-every part of you is healthy and sturdy, like your favorite tree
-come back slowly

Let it Be
feel confident about conforming and "going with the flow"
-do a few minutes of meditation, deep breathing
-visualize a long, deep river
-there's a sturdy, attractive sailboat waiting for you at the river's edge
-you get in, untether, and either a gentle breeze comes along to fill your sails, or the current pulls you along. Easy steering.
-Obstacles like rocks or trees are easily and effortlessly navigated
-sometimes you go faster, and you still effortlessly guide the boat, secure in your competence and enjoying the speed. At other times, the boat slows down, and you enjoy the scenery.
-if you see places on the shore you want to visit, you stop and rest or play.

Meditation (post 9)

this post will cover 5 cards- 5 days of daily meditations, from a deck of "centering excercises and calming journeys to lead you to peace." They are: New Day/New You, In the shower, Eating an orange, Walking meditation, and Creating home.

New Day, new you
-choose a day in advance
-when you wake up, remember that you are waking up to a new you
-while still in bed, stretch and yawn in ways that feel good to your body
-choose a favorite comfortable, outfit, and imagine that it's your first time wearing it.
(feel the texture, appreciate how the colors make you feel)
-try and live your day as if it were the first day of your routine, as if you had never done it before, and heightening/being aware of your day's senses of sights, sounds, smells, tastes.
-write about it at the end of your day

In the Shower
-imagine that the spray has all the colors of the rainbow
-also imagine that it is washing out all the negative thoughts and feelings from you down the drain, leaving you clean in both spirit and body.
-sing a favorite song (loudly?)
-upon drying, imagine that it is stirring up all the good thoughts and feelings available to you all over your body.

Eating an Orange
-meditate, deeply breathe
-pick a tasty fruit, such as a large, juicy orange
-feel it's texture, close your eyes and roll it around in your hands
-inhale it's fragrance
-slowly peel it, feeling the inside
-break off a section, sniff n' pop
-roll it on your tongue
-chew slowly, feel the juice
-imagine all the nutrients deeply feeding your body
-finish the rest of the orange as slowlly and consciously as possible.

Walking Meditation
(ha, I do this all the time)
-do a few minutes of meditation and deep breathing
-take a brief walk in comfortable clothes and shoes
-notice your breathing. is it/do you want to, link it in a conscious way?
-is the air moist, dry, heavy, crisp?
-really notice the environment. the ground (firm or spongy, springy or hard?)
how does it feel every time your foot hits the ground?
-pay attention to nature, trees, leaves, color shades of brown and green..
-upon return, write in your journal what you noticed

Creating a Home
this is all about feng shui and queer eye and better homes and gardens...
-spend a few minutes looking at your home, noticing how you decorate-or not
what's it about? a theme or style or eclectic or both?
-How do you feel about it? Is the clutter creative or annoying?
-now do a few moments of meditation, deep breathing, with a journal nearby
-imagine your ideal home. What's your overall feeling about it? Calming or stimulating or some of both?
-what small thing could you do to bring reality closer to your ideal? writing space? vase of flowers? rearrange some furniture?
-write in the journal what you want done, and by when.

L.O.A.

1) Love One Another
2) Law of Attraction

that's all I want to say here :-)

Meditation (post 8)

Maybe you're getting the hang of it, by now
But here's the Jesse-processed version of the visualization on Power Animals -from my wife's meditation deck.

POWER ANIMAL
I'm a turtle-monkey-skunk-dog (!) With a bit elephant and penguin, thrown in. Don't worry, I'm not a trapdoor spider. I met a guy named Parrot, and another guy who calls himself Snake. I like snakes. Snakes are cool. Can God be a snake? Sidewinders and anacondas and cobras and king and garter and ringneck and racer and rattler and gopher and reticulate pythons (that squeeze the breath out of you instead of crushing). Now that's power.
-sit, close
-go to your sanctuary
-invite one of your power animals to reveal itself. Let the animal come to you, instead of trying to choose. It may be shy and take some time to show itself. I saw an elephant and a snail, which could have been the shell of an ammonite or other shelled sea creature. I'm no Republican, though. Maybe you think I'm an ass? Ren and Stimpy like bumping theirs.
-when it appears, how does it feel? what does it make you think of? If it's too scary, open your eyes, but don't eliminate it...... Observe the animal, how has it influenced you, and how it may help in the future. Thank it for visiting you, say goodbye, and return, to write about the experience.

Meditation (post 7)

4 Visualizations:
Your Ideal Day, Inner Peace, Outer Peace, Intuition

YOUR IDEAL DAY
imagine your ideal day, start to finish, "sunrise to bedtime"
then
do a few minutes of meditation, deep breathing
imagine waking up from a deep, refreshing sleep
you yawn and stretch slowly in bed, bringing a feeling of health and life to your body
how do you start: e.g. walk, a favorite food, or exercise?
work: what kind, alone or with others, some of each, for how long?
lunch: when, what, with whom
what's your leisure(s)
how do you spend your evening, and end your day?

INNER PEACE
Creating this for within yourself is an act that is both powerful and comforting
-sit, close
-imagine yourself completely at peace
-think of the feeling as a completely positive state
(not a rxn to stress/disturbance), rather a state completely desirable on it's own merits.
-Visualize maintaining this state in different situations
(start with supportive situations, and gradually move on to situations of stress/distraction)
-imagine those around you noticing your peaceful quality, and responding positively to it.
Enjoy both your ability to maintain this state, and others' response.
-gradually return, and open your eyes.

Gatorade asks, "is it in you?"

OUTER PEACE
The line between internal and external might not be that distinct (!)
The card says, "We influence the world by how we think about it."
Everyone hopes for peace, in their personal lives, and for the world.
This exercise is an experiment in using creative thinking to expand the presence and influence of peace in your life. (the opposite can also be done, as I can attest)

-sit, close
-focus on your idea of peace. imagine it in your home, workplace, community, work.
How would it feel?
-Visualize yourself as a deeply peaceful person. Imagine that everywhere you go, your peaceful quality affects everyone around you, and that your presence brings a sense of calm into every situation- even the stressful and tense.
-imagine others expressing gratitude and appreciation for bringing peace into their lives. Enjoy the feedback.
-gradually return, open

INTUITION
Maybe you should use your intuition on how to do a meditation on it, itself.
Anyway,
-it's beyond the conscious, rational mind, the card says
sit and close
-think about a moment when you've surprised yourself with an insight, or in hindsight, thought to yourself how you knew that would happen.
-remember how this feels
-okay, this one's interesting (for me)...Is it, in any way, how we perceive God?
....Visualize offering advice to yourself, imagine you are sitting next to yourself, sharing insights.
-Imagine yourself alternately giving and receiving advice.
-when you're giving advice, imagine it's coming from a source beyond both your mind and your emotions.
-when receiving advice, imagine setting your emotions aside and considering the advice as objectively as possible.
-enjoy the dialog for as long as you like (you sick, sick person, lol)
gradually return to the present, and open your eyes.

Ignorance v. Wisdom

Ignorance is Bliss, they say.
and
Knowledge is Power

power corrupts; absolute power corrupts absolutely.
God is corrupt?
Or is God ignorant?

also,
Smarting hurts.

Has anyone ever told you, "Don't be smart with me, young man (or woman)"
Why the hell not?
Meritocracy gives power to the smart.
So is the dalai lama, who has power, corrupt?
Does he suffer from a burden of wisdom?
As my wife says, "it's his job to be happy".
Just some thoughts.

Meditation (post 6)

summary of visualization exercises:
Love, Romance, Joy, Friendship, Responsibility, Commitment
not too shabby, eh?

LOVE
sit, close
think, feel, think of different kinds: activities as well as people
where is love, where would you like more
imagine having as much as you'd like in every area
giving and receiving both
now imagine a small brilliant sun above you, pouring white light into your head, then torso, arms, and legs. Imagine it filling you with love, every cell in your body experiencing unconditional love. Enjoy for as long as you want.
Gradually return to the present, and open your eyes.

ROMANCE
you can use your imagination to issue an invitation
sit, close
think about, how does it feel
review your life. how much, what's your "romance quotient"
what would it mean to have more
what would a perfectly romantic day be (and maybe a bit beyond)?
Complete the day, and savor it
Gradually return to the present, and open your eyes.

JOY
I've said enough already, so I'll incorporate this funny song:


the actual video is pretty funny, too.

okay, I'll relate the new info :
sit, close
focus on joy. what does it mean to you. who do you know that is most joyful?
where is joy in your life present or absent?
what's your ideal of total joy
same old thing (light from above filling the body, from head to toes)
imagine the light is filling you with joy
gradually return and open your eyes

FRIENDSHIP
to create better and deeper friendships
begin with meditation/deep breathing
think about the people you feel closest to, what is it about each relationship that you cherish?
think about any positive aspect of friendship you'd like more of in your life.
how does ideal friendship feel?
in an ideal world, what would having friends be like?
gradually return and open your eyes.

RESPONSIBILITY
instead of being negative or burdensome, as is commonly thought-
this is about fully accepting your opportunities
in a joyful way
sit comfortably, close your eyes
think about what it means.
who do you have responsibility (for, and/or to)
what projects and outcomes
think of a past responsibility that you gladly accepted & led to positive experience.
what would your life be like if all your responsibilites were equally fulfilling
stay focused on this ideal of positive experience
imagine all the folks who will benefit from your experiencing responsibility in this way
gradually return to the present and open your eyes

COMMITMENT
perfecting the art of complete and joyful commitments
sit, close
what's your idea of it, where do your biggest ones lie
TOTAL commitment: how does it feel? what is so important to you that you could/might/have focus(ed) 100% on it.
imagine yourself completely committed in every major area of life and enjoying it.
imagine being a hero, because of commitment, to yourself and everybody around you.
visualize the white light from above (a "brilliant sun") flowing into your head and down to your toes, then becoming a white knight, happily filled.
gradually return to present, open your eyes
save the world, lol

Meditation (post 5)

I don't want to start any blasphemous rumors, but I think that God's got a sick sense of humor, and when I die, I expect to find him laughing. -Depeche Mode, Blasphemous Rumours

om.

cruel to be kind-nick lowe (in the right measure, means that I love you)

aha! you made it! Congrats, welcome to the afterlife! lol. now that wasn't such a big deal, was it, hohoho! lol. hehehaaha. You're gonna love it up here. Always and everywhere. Eternal bliss, now give me a kiss. Heheho.

This post deals with Abundance, Fun, and Freedom

I'm listening to the 70's and 80's station, ending with the Cure's Why Can't I be You.
Being God can be like that. Everything is relevant.
Envy is harmless, in small doses. But don't O.D.
Best ta check yoself befo you wreck yoself.
I still believe in Oblivion, though.
And being God can be anything else, too.
Maybe I'll hypnotize myself in my last moments in the hope of rising again.
Anyway,

More Visualizations, for your mental health and amusement:

ABUNDANCE
To clarify what's important to you-and create more of it.
sit comfortably, close your eyes, focus on and define for yourself what abundance means
think of the different kinds of abundance, and which you feel u have or not
envision complete abundance. what's your ideal.
imagine the ideal as a brilliant light shining from above. let it fill your entire body. breathe it in! come back slowly.

FUN
sit comfortably, close your eyes, think about having fun, think of different kinds of fun, laughter, playing with childhood friends vs. today, THEN think of how much fun you'd really like to have, what would you be doing, where, with who(m).
Think of a brilliant orange ball, bouncing around inside your torso.
Imagind being completely filled with the essence of laughter and fun (feel free to laugh out loud)
gradual return to present, and then open your eyes.
Not just agent starling needs more fun out of life!

FREEDOM
do a few minutes of meditation/deep breathing
focus your thoughts on freedom.
think about it in the most positive sense (freedom to do and be) rather than
freedom from problems (i.e. instead of freedom from financial worries, think of the freedom to obtain whatever you want).
do you feel free? in what ways yes, and what ways, not?
imagine total freedom
(what would you do, where, with whom..)
expand your vision
enjoy (your vision) for as long as you like
gradually return/open your eyes

Meditation (post 4)

It seems, I have to say, that Meditation could be the solution to everything
(when paired with ACTion, no?)
"You say you want a revolution, well, you know, we'd all like to change your head"

Anyway, this post will deal with only 3 cards:
Meeting Your Selves, Meeting Yourself, and Meeting Your Wise Self
That order seems logical to me, but we'll see.

MEETING YOUR SELVES
-Hi, Nice to Meet You, Selves
People with MPD (multiple personality disorder) integrate their personalities, for treatment; I have to say, this sub-personality talk has me weirded out. Anyway, I guess you're supposed to have an idea of all your sub-personalities before you begin. I'm me, though. How many me's are there, lol. The dead milkmen sing Now Everybody's ME! I love those guys.
Anyway,
prepare w/ meditation/deep breathing.
imagine taking all sub-personalities to a beautiful meadow on the top of a mountain (think like The Sound of Music, I guess) Invite them to form a circle, join the circle yourself
Imagine a great white light in the center.
Invite any of the sub-personalities who is willing to enter the center and be transformed by white light.
Notice it's appearance before and after the light thing.
(you don't have to visualize everybody)
imagine rays of light from the center enter each s-p in the center
Finally, step into the light yourself, and imagine that all the lightened s-p's reincorporate into you.
take a few moments to come back, then write about the experience.

MEETING YOURSELF
This is all about defining your identity...
Actually, the title is a bit misleading. It's about a way to confront a specific s-personality.
meditate, breathe deeply,..
forget it, I don't get or like this one.

aha. it must be david. Ugh.
Completely annoying, mostly. Shutup please.
I feel occcupied, if not possessed, although my medications make it better.
whatever, shit. This is God speaking: go to hell, David.
I know, resentment doesn't suit me. How bout a simple Gr.

anyway, the card says to notice the sub-p approaching you, greet it warmly, know that it believes it's doing something positive, thank it for it's help so far, ask if it would be willing to do the same job from a different, higher up perspective (a promotion, eh?), then walk up through the meadow to the mountaintop, show it the view, notice if the appearance changes, thank it and say goodbye.. return to the present, write.

And now, card 3: Meeting Your Wise Self!

MEETING YOUR WISE SELF
it's a part of you/me that can help find solutions to challenges
-prepare with meditation, deep breathing
-imagine yourself at a self place, maybe that meadow or mountain
-sit comfortably
-golden light coming toward you from a distance, growing bigger and brighter, filling you with relaxation and delight. When beside you, it may be human, or still light
-bask or ask; if you have any questions, ask. or enjoy the radiance.
-imagine the light entering your body, filling you with a higher wisdom.
-thank it for its help; return slowly

okay, I have to admit I don't believe the sun is filled with wisdom, or that white light is any different than golden light (other than it's wavelength) , and I want to know what's going on with all this hypnosis. Gimme summa that wisdom, ball of light! I'm skeptical, but hey, whatever works.

I have to incorporate one idea that came to me. If we really each have a group of selves, we may have an idea about which self is good, better, best, or even worst. It seems we need to have compassion for ourselves, between each.

Meditation (post 3)

Visualization exercises, written by Elizabeth Dickinson and Christopher Childs
(summary of meditation deck of cards).
Health, Growth, Creativity, Inspiration, Life Purpose, Wisdom

HEALTH
-Sit comfortably, close your eyes, think about your body and its state of health.
-Then, compare how you ARE doing to how you'd LIKE it to be.
-Gradually focus more and more on your idea of perfect health. Enjoy!
Imagine a small sun over your head, beaming light down onto you.
Let it fill you. Bathe in the warmth and glow of it, for as long as you like.
Gradually return and open your eyes.

GROWTH
-meditate and breathe deeply, to begin
-which areas are you growing in and which areas of your life are you stuck?
-think about who you'd like to be, your ideal self...in detail, and larger than life.
-how does he/she look, interact, talk?
-imagine yourself growing in size until you fill the giant image you built of your ideal self
-feel what it's like
-come back to the present without shrinking

CREATIVITY
keep a dream journal. isolate yourself, so your imagination goes into overdrive. hypnotize yourself into thinking you're an inventor, creating things that will make people happy(ier).
Work at the patent office, like Einstein. Above all, Make things that make you happy, or write things...(those were my thoughts)
Now, for the card
people say we're born creative. Recapture it. Make something beautiful. Imagine yourself as creative as you like, or being Leonardo da Vinci, or -even further- you have a magic want to create anything you imagine, that fills you with creative energy. (it says to make an orb filled with light, from which you get your creative energy)

INSPIRATION
more inspired, more of the time
I have a dream...that YOU have a dream.
Inspiration is 1%, the rest is perspiration (?)
alright, you know the drill: sit comfortably, close your eyes.
remember times of inspiration and creativity
imagine being an inventor in a brightly lit studio or lab, feeling joyful, light, and intelligent.
imagine having a Wow! idea (whether or not you can specify it)
imagine being congratulated by excited and impressed people
come back slowly

LIFE PURPOSE
The highest purpose, the funnest purpose, the wealthiest opportunity...
hmm.
says here, on the card...that
begin with a few moments of meditation, deep breathing

meditate and breathe deely (mbd)
ask your higher self or wiser self to be with you (!)
make a symbol that represents your life's purpose
things, or qualities, or both -acceptable
imagine the symbol on the top of a mountain
walk, dance, or run to the top of the mountain
hold the symbol in your hands, surround it with light, and take it into your heart
return from the mountain
come back slowly
record your experiences

WISDOM
contemplate the difference between smart and wise
s.c. & c.y.e (sit comfortably and close your eyes)
think of the wisest person you know. ask yourself why.
think of past moments of wisdom in your own life
either to guide yourself, or somebody else
think of yourself, a wise elder, far in the future
gradually return and open your eyes

Meditation (post 2)

I forgot the most basic thing- Breathing!

BREATH
or, rather, focusing on and counting each breath
in silence/a silent place
with uncrossed legs
sitting up straight, with back support
so as to remove stress, lower blood pressure (reduce hypertension),

close your eyes
your breath will start to deepen and slow down
which is good

FOCUS
let go of distracting thoughts
perhaps using a mental phrase to keep the focus
your mind thinks it needs to be doing something
if you think of things you don't want to forget, have a pad and pen ready
imagine putting distracting thoughts in a balloon, and releasing them to float away.

do it once or twice a day for 10 to 20 minutes

conscious, rhythmic breathing
increases relaxation and deepens meditation
when you breathe, expand the lower belly
and slowly fill your body with oxygen
from the bottom of your belly to the top of the chest
then, exhale slowly, gently drawing in the belly

it seems there's a proper way of breathing...
do something 3 times, do something else 3x, then do something other for 4x.
do those 10 things 3x
it has something to do with counting time for inhale, exhale, and hold (for both)
which, unfortunately, I guess, I don't get. So, nevermind, I say.
It's more fun to discover an effective technique for yourself, isn't it?
I'll tell you what the card says if you email me.

People always wonder if they're doing it right
Another card says no matter what, you're doing it right.
Just the attempt is laudable
even for people who have meditated for years, some days are easier than others.

Sanctuary
It is recommended that, when meditating, you come from a good place
i.e.
-either a place you remember as safe and serene, or
-a place in your imagination, that permits escape to something better, like a peaceful natural setting. (I like where I am, with my 2 dogs- my cushion is the dog bed). The sun and breeze and birds and flowers and friendly animals make it ideal, for example.
Stay as long as you want, come back slowly, and maybe write down your experiences.

Journal
a useful way to record meditation experiences, that allows you remember and see progress. It's easy to think of yourself as the same person, but a journal shows change (incremental or transformative). Choose a blank book that you like, i.e. with or without lines, of whatever size, so you can write changes in your body, like being more relaxed, and insights you gain.

Stretching
They're always telling you when to exhale. What's up with that?? Anyway, place your right hand on your left knee, and rotate your trunk/spine to the left, then vice versa, twisting with the exhale.

Neck and Shoulder tension
-lower and raise your head (to and from your chest), without forcing it, with a relatively straight spine (exhale lowering, and inhale raise) 3X.
-Move your head to the right, to your back, and to your left side.
when finished, roll your head in a circle, 3x in each direction. Don't ever hold your breath.

(okay, they're not telling me why I can't hold my breath, or what's really going on, here. I would like to know)

Honesty
I find this exercise a bit creepy. Sit, close your eyes, think about times you've been honest to others, and others to you. Imagine sitting with a famously honest person, and have a conversation about what it means to be honest. Tell this person what you think the pros and cons of honesty are. Imagine the response, without debate, listen attentively, then gradually return to the present. (This smacks to me of talking to ghosts, like the crazy elder Tesla did. Or just plain crazy talking to yourself; aka self-talk, aka mental masturbation).

Sub-personalities
This sounds like schizophrenia or multiple personality disorder, watered down for everybody else, who seem to think they're sane. Common sub-personalities (less developed or mature aspects of your personality) include the inner child and the inner critic. Contemplate a recent situation where you wish you had reacted differently -what part of your personality seems to have been in charge? If it was a separate person (possibly a different gender), what does he or she look like, and how do they dress, speak, move? When did he/she appear first in your life?
Write down what you've learned.
(wow, this exercise is for everyone...perhaps everyone really IS crazy).
(wait, shouldn't it be ARE)

Visualization (Use your imagination to consciously create what you want)
This one you can lie down on, if you prefer. Sit or lie comfortably, meditate and breathe for a few minutes, to relax. Think of a quality you would like more of in your life. Remember a time when you felt you used and possessed that quality. Remember how it felt, and where in your body it felt present. Now imagine that quality as a colored light that spreads into every nook and cranny of your being, until you are competely filled with that light and quality. Come back and resume your day, and then notice that you can access this quality and feeling anytime.

Meditation (post 1)

I actually know very little about it, so this is my understanding
-before I actually learn from 2 books my wife has on the subject,
The Meditation deck (of cards), 50 cards by Compass Labs, and
Meditation for Beginners (a book), by Jack Kornfield

a preliminary post
before conveying all the basic info I'm privy to from these sources.

okay,
One form of meditation is saying and repeating a mantra,
like nam myoho renge kyo, or Om.

Another is meditating on a subject, like compassion
or focusing on a single object (like a doorknob?)

Generally, you're sitting (such as in the lotus position, which I cannot do), and in silence.
Maybe there's incense. It's all about clearing your mind, gaining clarity. Or becoming. Or channeling energy to somehow make a better world, in addition to a better you. Invigoration. Purpose. Slowing down, calm, tranquil, relaxed. Feeling good.

It's the fanciest way of doing nothing. It might even be the most efficient way of doing anything.
Om.

At least that's what I think it is.
Like what christians call prayer, just from eastern traditions, instead.

Generating Power

Couldn 't excersize bicycles be paired with a battery or batteries to generate home power?

It, or something like it (a stairmaster?), could be a really cool way to convert extra calories into home electricity.

First, you could buy any type or amount of food you want. You can convert fat in your body, or extra calories from what you're eating day to day, to run all the appliances in your house.

And in an efficient way.
If you have a big household, maybe you could sell extra power to the grid.
I like excercise. You can listen to music, and get all sweaty, and feel the satisfaction of making progress (toward your new year's resolution?)

It's got to be really simple. When I was growing up, my dad had an excercise bike. If you make more power by going at a higher tension at the same speed, you'll feel twice as good, maybe.

It doesn't have to completely replace the grid, and I would imagine it shouldn't, but to burn a percentage of your bill into muscles, fitness, aerobic stamina, and overall health, these things should be everywhere.

An extra layer of oogies of joy when you work out.
Just an idea.

although, I saw a site trying to sell a pmm (perpetual motion machine), which would just go forever, presumably. It involves magnets, lol.

question: could you bicycle power your car if it runs out of gas, to get you to the station?

Water

It's been on my mind, lol

I saw a Ted lecture, given by the inventor of this filter, with nanoscale pores, that will work on muddy, diseased water, with a pump filtration system, that will save oodles of poodles (many people...scuse me, i'm feeling happy). If we, humanity, give everyone these filters, we'll all be happier. And healthier, too. I'm jazzed.

http://www.ted.com/talks/michael_pritchard_invents_a_water_filter.html

This can be merged with the water trike. It could be put on the pumps themselves, as well as the containers, I imagine. It just seems like a revolutionary invention. I wonder why there aren't the very best and brightest working together to systematically solve virtually any problem, like this engineer did, only after getting angry and deciding to do something about it.

There are de-ionizing machines, too, for whatever that means.
Then there's something called dry water. (does it have a lower evaporation rate?)
I don't know what freeze-dried water's about, either. Something about astrobiology.
Also, there's a vest that purifies the water inside it, by being exposed to sunshine.

And there are also Dr. Emoto's photos, which means thoughts or words directed like prayers toward the water will give it crystals, instead of lumps, which everyone seems to assume is healthier water. There's alot of uproar about this. I'm inclined to believe at the very least that the mind can change matter; for instance, with noises off (a scientologist told me that noises off were the sounds that your house makes, which I also associate with the clicks my tv makes when it is turned off. In my world, -off- tv's punctuate my thoughts and buses make exasperated sighs).

-The earth surface (not composition) is like 70% water, our bodies (adult) are like 70% water, and
-the trillions of chambers (cells) in our body strike me as being similar to the water featured in the dry water article, which are powder-coated droplets, affected by gravitational, electrical, or magnetic fields. (could pure water be packaged like m&m's?)

-waiter, more water. My weight is what? Angkor wat.. Dubya at ER.

Pisces and Aquarius are all about water, and I think there are other water signs. Does Africa have many swimming pools? I love to swim. Africans shouldn't have to worry about alligators, hippos, malaria, and worms, etc when they take a dip. I mean, unless they really, really want to.

Someone said you should drink half your weight of water, daily (IN OUNCES!). thx, shelley.

There's talk of future scarcity, or flooding, due to climate change, that will play into politics, and maybe even conflict. This book sounds interesting.

Here's the link to Engineers Without Borders (on Wikipedia); link

kay, nuf for now

I seem to have defied Hermeticism

this quote, from Wikipedia's entry on "The All" speaks to me:

"According to Hermetic doctrine, The All is a bit more complicated than simply being the sum total of the universe. Rather than The All being simply the physical universe, it is more correct to say that everything in the universe is within the mind of The All, since the ALL can be looked at as Mind itself. [3] In effect, the universe is partially existent on the Mental plane, and we may in fact all be parts of The All's psychological makeup, representing parts of The All in its dream or meditation.

The Three Initiates (see The Kybalion) strongly caution that we restrain from simply declaring "I am God" for oversimplification purposes. Though you are a part of The All, you are but one small piece of that puzzle. You cannot be equated with God anymore than your toenail can be equated with you. You have the potential for perfection and to rejoin God, but you are not the totality of God. [4]

The All's mind can be seen as infinitely more powerful and vast than any of us could hope to achieve. [5"

SO, Has Hermeticism put the smack down on my blog?
Well, I am God, as you are God, as anything else is God.
Or even as nothing is God...because not everything is good.
perhaps.
But I'm not about to declare myself to be Jesus' toenail, lol.
I'm simply me, I am what I am, I am who I am,
and I have to say I understand what 'I am who am' refers to,
being crazy and all.
Plus I'm good,
and I love everybody (but not in that way, you horndogs)

I have my defense, but I suppose the Hermetics have brought me down a notch.
It's kind of fun to find a commentary like this on Wikipedia.

Notches that don't exist, or notches like, say, from me being #1 to all of us as #1, as in We're number 1, in this silly virtual game we're playing for moral and afterlife superiority, as if good were playing evil in some sporting activity. All-1 is the philosophy that the mystical Dr. Bronner's espouses on his soap bottles. But I already said that, I guess. Are we or are we not all equal? om. in what ways for either. Just as a gun can be considered The Equalizer, so is Oblivion. And of course, we're not born equally, no matter what the constitution says. We have equal rights, is all that means, I guess. Some people are more God than others?

Note: Oblivion has 'i liv on' in it (!)

Ch.'s 4 and 5, of Happiness (for no reason)

a summary of Marci Shimoff's book, part 5 of 5

-listen to paraliminal recordings on headphones to engage your subconscious mind, "which is responsible for 90% of our thoughts."

-2 out of 3 adults in America have low self-esteem. She recommends the mirror exercise, in which you compliment yourself in as many way as you can think to do, stop judging yourself, and over time -you find the beauty and goodness in yourself, and through yourself, gain the ability to take time to savor the good things that make you stronger and able to love others more.

We're often raised not to toot our own horns, not to give ourselves credit or acknowledgement, and actually beat ourselves up, instead. (Althought I have to say I was congratulated my entire life, it seems like to me, I graduated through all the ranks of scouting and honors high school, getting a UC Berkeley alumni scholarship, and entering the UCD Integrated Studies honor program -taking a class in theology, for example. But anyway..).

-5 happiness "Action Steps" for your Mind
1. Don't believe everything you think- do The Work if you catch yourself thinking a negative thought (to see if it's true or not)
2. "Sticky" negative thoughts require the letting go exercise (Sedona method)
3.Mirror exercise, to register the + about yourself
4.Give happiness awards throughout your day, to reverse the negativity bias, or at least to partially counteract it (e.g. best garden, best flower, best thought, best smile, the most courteous driver, the best-behaved dog, etc.).
5. Choose your thoughts. Select the ones that make you happier.

----------
And now (now that we've finished Mind), onto the Heart
(body, soul, purpose, and relationships are the other 4)
-seems to me it's all the same thing, anyway

it (the heart) is the heart of who we are. the deepest and most valuable essence of our being.
the Upanishads say the whole universe dwells within it....(okay, whatever)

happy people have the same fears, pains, and disappointments as the rest, they just have different habits "that allow them to keep their hearts open in their daily lives." (open heart surgery? the metaphor and the actual organ are being used interchangeably..ugh.)

"The heart has a powerful energy field; they generate an electromagnetic field around us that is several feet in diameter and five thousand times greater than the field generated by the brain."

-the heart(beat) can have rhythm coherence or incoherence. Different emotional states have different patterns. Incoherence is damaging. Coherence is good: bp, aging, cognitive functioning, immune system. Positive emotions are good for you. Maybe 7 years of lifespan worth.

-negative emotions like anger, frustration, sadness release stress hormones and cholesterol into your body, and the heart pumps faster and blood pressure rises.
-positive emotions like appreciation, love, and emotional balance increase production of good hormones like the anti-aging hormone DHEA, improve cognitive function, and strengthen the immune system.

-here's the good part: when you focus on good emotions, you affect your heart rhythm at will.
Focus on Gratitude, Forgiveness, and Lovingkindness (the 3 happiness habit for your heart)

two steps
-a mantra from a zen master goes, "Thank you for everything. I have no complaints whatsoever."
-Another practice is to laugh for 10 minutes a day. A "little odd", Rico admits in his testimonial, but it adds health benefits through the added endorphins, cleanses emotionally, and keeps his happiness at a high level.

-law of attraction revisited: focusing your attention on what's already good, what's working, will draw more good to you. (what you appreciate, appreciates)

-people who describe themselves as grateful have more vitality, optimism, and suffer less stress. They also have fewer episodes of clinical depression than the overall population.

Dr. Emoto's photos. Water reacts to feelings directed at it... crystals vs. lumps were photographed when people were directed to focus love and thanks on one container of water, whereas 'you make me sick, i hate you' on the other. (this has me genuinely puzzled)

-Brother David, a youthful benedictine monk in his 80's, says "happiness is not what makes us grateful, but gratefulness makes us happy." He practices having a theme for each day to evoke gratitude, such as the sound of traffic, or water.

-another testimonial, from Marc Bekoff, says, "Happiness is just a part of who I am. At my core, I'm always happy- and there are times when also profoundly sad. They aren't mutually exclusive. The sadness doesn't take away the happiness."

-----
well, my library book is due back, so I think I'll just leave it at that.

I used to be, or act like I was to the extent I fooled myself, super happy and cheerful, like the tone of her book. I have consistently believed that I was happy before being on medications, and have only been medicated because people thought I was annoying. I have to say, although I haven't finished the book, it's kind of saccharine, and doesn't completely sit well with me, like she's trying too hard and reality is just SO goddamn miserable for so many that self-hypnosis to make your personal world impenetrable to depression seems artificial. In other words, I find HER annoying, a little bit. She's plainly a Buddhist, which makes me think of being fat and happy, (like Gautama?) which is fine, but obesity is a big problem. Did the Buddha eat his misery and drink away his troubles? Resentment vs. Gratitude, you be the judge.

I plan to continue reviewing (some of) the happiness literature for this blog (for myself as well as for all y'all). Peace.

Just Plain Happy

Marci Shimoff's book, "Happiness for No Reason": my 4th posting of 5

My list of interesting points she makes:

Ch.4, The Mind (thoughts, beliefs, self-talk)
-can make a hell of heaven, and a heaven of hell
-to receive true happiness and inner peace, you have to change the way you think
-should support happiness, not sabotage it.
-scientists say we have about 60k thoughts a day, and 95% are habitual
-negative thoughts are common, say 80% of those 60k (more than 45k!)
-Dr. Amen calls them ANTs, Automatic Negative Thoughts
-these thoughts stimulate depression and anxiety, whereas
-positive thoughts are calming and beneficial.
(like poison and medicine)
-the solution is to know that Your thoughts aren't alway true.
-so, judging, worrying, overthinking, dwelling on the bad is contractive, while
-accepting, trusting, clear thinking, and savoring the good is expansive
-we most often aren't, or hardly, even aware that our thoughts might not be true
-negative thoughts are more powerful than positive ones, we're wired that way by evolution.
-it's called the 'negativity bias'
-the physiological reason negative experiences are "sticky" is the amygdala
-that's the part of the brain that sets off the alarm for fight or flight
-heart rate, adrenaline, and stress hormones go up
-many have overactive amygdalas, to boot ("hot"), and without fighting or fleeing
-the chemicals accumulate, causing fatigue and disease
-this is a major obstacle to happiness, and people with hot amygdalas
-have short fuses, panic easily, and make mountains of molehills
-are drama queens, rage-aholics, worrywarts, and chronic complainers
-there's hope. neuroplasticity research shows how new thoughts create a new brain,
-and maybe even alters your dna itself, she says (in quoting Dr. Davidson)
-"You can't paste a smiley face over your pain or spread a layer of icing over cake that's burned to a cinder."
-Neocortex to the rescue! it's where happiness lives (left prefrontal area o' brain)
-more alpha wave activity is the sign of a happy brain
-happy people are:
more skeptical of negative thoughts, question alarms, and override them when necessary
-are aware of the negativity bias, don't fight with them, "and go beyond the mind." (?)
-register their positive thoughts, and savor their positive experiences
-a jesuit said the false beliefs in your head are the Only cause of unhappiness, or
-as a tibetan monk said, "the real enemy of happiness is the mind's fixations and delusions."
-for any given disturbing thoughts or interpretations of events, ask yourself:
-is it true? can you absolutely know it's true? how do you react when you believe that thought? who would you be without that thought? This is called The Work, by Katie
-asking these questions is a way to experience the opposite of what you believe.
-She has it in bold-face, "All suffering comes from believing our own thoughts"
-This guy named Bruce, in his testimony to MS, says that he's "come to a place of real peacefulness, of letting go and accepting things as being just what they are and nothing more," despite a painful divorce, through The Work.
-specifically, the pain was reduced/eliminated happily, through the process of questioning his own assumptions, which led to the realization that the situation itself was not the source of his pain, but rather his interpretation of it.
-Epictetus, a Greek philosopher, said "We are disturbed bot by what happens to us, but by our thoughts about what happens.
-the bottom line: thoughts come and go, relationships and pain come and go, and clinging to your stories about what you think you want and need is a surefire recipe for suffering.
-that's only part of the story for being happy (in the mental sphere)
-A simple, effective technique called the Sedona method, a tool for personal growth, a way of letting go of all inner limitations, goes something like this:
-hold a pen. it represents your thoughts and feelings. your hand is your awareness. though uncomfortable, the pen feels "normal." Next, roll the pen on your palm. Notice the two are not attached to each other. You are not your thoughts and feelings. Now, turn your hand over and let go. Presto! The guy who invented this turned an expectation of imminent death into 42 more years of life (d. age 84).
-summary:thoughts and feelings aren't facts and aren't you. You can let them go.
-find your true essence, the happiness you were born with...(aren't most of us born unhappy?)
-while getting rid of your deadweight baggage (unhappy thoughts and feelings), so you can go beyond your mind.

H4NR

Chapter 3 summary , and part 3, also, of my book report
of Marci Shimoff's work, entitled, Take Ownership of Your Happiness, pp. 49-81

To continue her Building a Home for Happiness (which I assume is like a turtle's) metaphor, she considers the foundation for happiness to be:

1)Focus on the Solution
2)Look for the Lesson and the Gift
3Make peace with yourself

H4NR, in addition to it's strong foundation (we're building a happy house; e.g. your body), there are also 4 walls, a roof, and a garden, each with 3 sub-points each for a total of 21 Happiness Habits. (Any connection to nun's habits?) She's talking about True happiness, and Enduring happiness. An ambitious book, I would say.

The Foundation of H4NR:
1. focus on the solution
victims focus on the problem and complain (contracting e).
Victors focus on the solution (expanding e).
(i still don't get the energy thing; i kind of suspect it's a woman's thing)
-someone told marci that the average person complains 70x a day.
that sucks! lol.
Seriously, though. All these damn vampires sucking the happiness out of you.
she mentions pastor Will Bowen, and his millions of bracelet shifters
-solutions-focus, developed by Mark McKergow,
rate (a situation, a relationship, whatever) on a scale of 1-10, 10 the most satisfied.
THEN, write down all the reasons you didn't score lower (vs. why you didn't score higher)
then, think of all the small steps that can be taken to increase your satisfaction level/score.
then, notice the times you feel more satisfied, and build up.stop complaining, and start collecting things/activities/strategies that make you happy in life, to keep you focused on what's working.
I think of it like a snowball, with momentum, getting bigger and bigger (the snow being your
happiness). I'm not over the hill yet, so it's a Sisyphean snowball. A naturally growing phenomenon.

2. Look for the Lesson and the Gift.
Don't blame. Not yourself, not anyone else. "Blame is a no-win proposition, and we all probably have better things to do like being peaceful, content, and happy," says Chellie, a member of marci's happy hundred (of which only 21 are quoted in the book). If anything, "blame" it on god, who has a higher purpose for you that you might not see. MS (Marci Shimoff) says both a)many of the things she set her heart on would have actually made her miserable, in hindsight, and b)often, the things she thought were bad turned out to be the greatest blessings in her life. So labelling events "good" or "bad" may be unwise in the first place. Instead, the happy hundred view everything as containing a gift or lesson, though they may not be able to see it in the moment. One never knows. SO, to expand your energy despite tough times, "try believing that what's happened is for the best. The universe is out to support you. Happy, happy. joy, joy. Just another day in Paradise. For realz. If you want to be happy, H4NR-style, you've got to accept the proposition that yeah, "it's all good."

Personally, I'm not sure I'll ever be this ridiculously gleeful a believer in divine control of everthing, so that it all works out for the best. I'm rather fond of the dark side of the force. AND, I think it's more realistic. Then again, as the Grateful Dead say, "I'm goin' to hell in a bucket, but at least I'm enjoying the ride." Like riding a rollercoaster into hell...ugh. I'm a firm disbeliever in hell, or any kind of afterlife for that matter, except oblivion, of course, i.e. being scattered to the 4 winds. I like the GD, but I hate the concept of hell. No one is going to suffer throughout eternity for anything, but some people might live some rather/fairly rotten lives. The belief in heaven can really help people cope. I look forward to eating my apple pie in heaven.

But Dr. Ellis, a psychologist, says, "The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You realize you control your destiny." Conversely, a study shows that people who blame others for severe accidents "displayed expecially low coping scores."

3. Make Peace with Yourself
I may be schizophrenic, but I'm at peace with myself. In college, I had a sticker of the Dead Milkmen on my bike, from their album Soul Rotation. If, in the words of x by y, I'm a million different people from one day to the next, I can't change...(you might know it), then maybe I have a few me's, that correspond to Goffman's presentation of self in society, and the different roles I play. Silence of the Lambs has a line about Your-self storage as being too hokey for Lecter. Robin Williams can get really nutty with his roleplaying, and speaking of lambs, the Lambchop's play along was some seriously crazy sh--. MS isn't really talking about all this, so I guess I'm a bit off track.

Anyway, what MS is saying is we need to get rid of our shame, guilt, self-blame (that eat at us), and instead accept our avoided feelings.And maybe even share them. Zainab Selbi, an author, activist, and founder/ceo of the humanitarian organization Women for Women International, describes how to make lemonade from lemons. The lemons, actually, are the unspeakable violence and rape of women in Croatia and africa. Selbi says, "If people are afraid to tell their stories, I tell them from my own experience, it will only lead you to a great fortune- of inner peace, and the joy and lightness that comes with it." That's the carrot. The stick is that "people who bury their traumas live shorter, unhealthier, unhappier lives than those who tell their stories."

The "happiness robbers" of complaining, blaming, and feeling shame (i.e. it's all my fault)(is it??), i.e. if you always feel like a victim, if not corrected, will draw the same situations to you again and again, such as the same type of unhealthy relationships. She quotes author Eckhart Tolle, "the past cannot prevail against the power of Now."

Instead of switching a bracelet around until you reach 21 days of perfection, she recommends having a fine (say 2 bucks) put in a bucket, for every time you blame, make an excuse, compain, indulge in self-pity, or beat yourself up. Eventually the groups she was in "stopped playing the victim game."

Finally, it's never too late. You can teach an old dog new tricks. She cites her mother, who exercises, meditates, travels, gets massages, and is a member of various clubs, at the age of 85.