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 Dad spurts.  Mom cums.  Semen inseminates.  Magic happens.  Sperm penetrates egg.  Life begins.  9 months later, you’re ejected.   Out into the world, the light, to breathe, and suckle, and cry, and pee and poo.   You get burped.  You spit up on the towel on your mom’s shoulder.  The airplane flies a crooked spoon full of mush into your mouth.  You sleep in your crib.  You keep your parents awake.  You listen to recordings of surf, stream, rain, whale.  You play peekaboo.  People put their fingers in your hand.  Tickling.  Hugs and kisses.  Da-da.  Ma-ma.  Strollers and highchairs.  Crawling.   Toddling.  Putting stuff in the mouth.  Jumping in the doorway bouncy-seat.  Banging pots and pans.  Unspooling a roll of toilet paper.  Peeing while the diaper is being changed.  Trains, dinosaurs, nerf blasters, star wars.  Blocks, Legos.  First word.  First steps.  Keeping track of height, on the wall.  Halloween costumes.  Jungle gyms.  Slides.  Baths. Learning to ride a bike.  I’m still learning how to ride my bike, lol.  Life story.  Jumprope.  Big wheels.  Soccer, frisbee, basketball, baseball, football.   4 square.  Handball.  merry-go-round, red light green light, dodgeball.  Butterfly knives, throwing stars, wrist rockets.  Stealing metal valve stem caps from automobiles for your bike.  Candy, maybe.  Or a Rubik’s cube.  Cheating.  Dungeons and dragons.  Rock n roll.  Porn.  Capturing bees.  Throwing snails.  Looking for salamanders.  Indian clay.  Hide and go seek.  Capture the flag.  Sesame Street.  3-2-1- contact.  Miami Vice.  Sledge Hammer.  Electric company.  Muppets. Hardcastle and McCormick.  Chips.  Magnum PI.  Red and blue teams.  Radio, records, cassettes.  Chicago Bulls.  SF 49ers.  Joe Montana, Dwight Clark, Jerry Rice.  SF Giants.  Beat the Dodgers.  Little Giants.  Croix d’ Candlestick.  Scorpions, Def Leppard, Led Zeppelin, Y and T, The Who, Bob Segar, Genesis, The Kinks, Rush, Miami Vice soundtrack, Phil Collins, Van Halen, ZZ Top, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Depeche Mode, Information Society.  Catholic Mass every weekend, exploratorium, bubbles, roller skates, water rockets, soap box car, painting my bmx, Oakley grips, halloween robot, homemade bow and arrow, taking bike on jumps, trail, zigzag up steep hills, bunny hop and bronco, wheelie, corgi matchbox and hot wheels, trip to Harrah's car collection, Concours d' elegance, dragon bat-launcher, tom selleck look a like contest, Mrs. Field's cookies, cinnamon raisins... 

Etc. etc.

(50 pages?)