Moi

Me, Myself, and I

ME

Hello.  My name is Jesse.  Hola.  Me llamo Chuy.  

I am Jesus.  I am chewy.  I am hey Zeus.  I am Chewbacca?

I am a man.  I am white.  Well part of my eyes are white, anyway.

I was raised Catholic.  I am a Democrat.  I am pro-life.

I am 6’2’’, 230 pounds, brown hair, blue eyes, born 9/03/1971 (50 y.o.)

I grew up in San Francisco, went to St. Stephen’s and St. Ignatius

I was adopted.  My birth family contacted me while I was a sophomore in college.

I was an International Relations (I.R.) major in college (UCD), minoring in Spanish.

S.S. grammar school (grades 1-8), and SI “college preparatory” (high school, 9-12)

MYSELF

At UC Davis (University of California at Davis) I played intramural sports

   (floor hockey, and ultimate frisbee), and played recreational basketball,

And swam laps in a pool, took PE classes in racquetball, tennis, weight lifting, and jiu jitsu

I also spent some time at an Aikido dojo.    I went white water rafting with Outdoor Adventures, down the South Fork of the American River.   I took an experimental college class in massage.

I played some ping pong and biked with the bike team a little.  I joined a health club.  

I

I am an Eagle Scout.  I won the Boston college book award, and the Journalism Award.

I was mayor of San Francisco for a day.  I got a 1260 on my SAT.  99th percentile, verbal.  I earned a UCBerkeley alumni scholarship (but went to UCD).  A year on staff at BSA summer camp, I won Most Spirited.  I was my high school yearbook editor-in-chief.  I ran track, and cross country.   And I was in the Service Club.  I worked at the pool, the canoe base, COPE, commissioner, scout craft, and rifle range.  I taught tote n’ chip, and hiking skill award.  I was little Zeke, and king Cairn.

No-Self

I am none of these things?  Not permanently, anyway

I am not my name.  I am not the Eucharist.  I am 50 years young. 

I am a body.   I like my body.   I want to improve my body.  

I want to look better and be healthier and feel alive

GOD

love, good, one, a man of war

God loves all, himself, and even those who hate him

God loves love, loving, being loved

Agape, Philia, Eros, and anything else you can think of 

Well, not rape, incest, pedophilia, bestiality, homosexuality, though

Come again?  Homosexuality, as in homosex

Masturbation is a homosexual relationship with yourself! ha

God loves making babies, making love

   - consensual, heterosexual, adult, marital, procreative sex

okay, champs?  pervs are losers; be a winner

Loving-kindness, love-bliss, love that fits like a glove

Who am I to judge? Says the pope

You’re the fucking pope, says God 

Then again, the rainbow is a sign of hope, in the Bible

appropriated by the LGBTQI community

and maybe God likes less overpopulation, too

  (or even just plain less population)

also, god is a man of war, and war is the art of deception

the truth remains a sacred mystery

do what feels good?  do nothing?

doing what you're not supposed to do also has its thrill

allowed, a loud;  permission, a prrr mission (go cats)

Louis CK is God, lol

On and on

Carry on

What?

What’s on?  Old Norse

Carry the cross?  Carry Jesus?  Old news

    Old news and a new olds

ON, Oliver North, Old Navy, Or Nothing

Bm

Boring myself

Jest, Jess T, Jesse Teshara, Jesse Lawrence Teshara

There are two Jesse Tesharas

   I shit you not

Spit shit on a tit (ew, gross)

So anyway, jest, digest, ingest, egest, suggest, gestation…

A jess is.a strap for the bird’s leg in falconry

Jessant is issuing forth (e.g. as a blade of grass)

Joss Whedon and Jussie Smollett and Tennessee

Jass is a cardgame (i’ve never played)

   A former name for jazz music

J-Z, Jesse, geezy, Josie, Jose, juicy J

Jews and jooz, choose your ooze

jews in the news, uzis and joozy

Oohs and ahhs 

Jaws and Oz

Fleas, flies, flows, flaws

flu, flue, flew, floo 

I am God.  I am a mere mortal.  There is no eternal life.  God is something different than what most people think.   I know what most people think, I’m God.  Are you like most people?  Most people think God is in the sky.   Like, if you think about it, a space alien in the heavens.  Either flying around in a ufo, or on his/her/its home planet.  The heavens, if you think about it, can be either singular or plural.  And earth can be in the heavens.   That is, one of them.  Like, if you’re on heroin, won the lottery, are in love, are a player on a winning team, or are satiated from a truly perfect meal.  Or, sex.  Maybe you can think of other things, like finishing a bucket list, or writing a book, or delivering a baby, or getting a tan, or a high from surfing, or savagely beating an enemy, or waking up refreshed, or taking a hot shower, or getting lost in a book, or seeing a stunning performance, etc.  I DO believe there must be some space aliens, but I’m not about to attribute God status to (one of) them.  Heaven is a psychological state, not a place.  Space, in fact, is inhospitable, and boring, and not very heavenly.  You can train your mind to be happy almost anywhere, though.  The exception would be hell.   Everybody has their own personal hell, their own personal jesus, their own separate mind.   There are fun and amazing dreams - and also nightmares.  God knows you.  Mind is mined.  I am not that God.  I live in MY mind, alone.  But I still assume most of what I think originates externally.  If there’s a single source, that would be my God.  That’s like Father and Son, both telepaths, in each other’s heads.   Everybody else is an amalgamated Holy Spirit, is how the godly psyche operates, the Mind of God.   Morpheus generates detailed imagery and dreams, like spells.  TV and movies (and books) get their inspiration from this stunningly visual eidetic genius telepath.  And mathematician.  And natural psychologist.  I think he thinks of himself as a vampire.  Life is interesting, even if he’s mostly annoying. Sever the connection. Adrift in a sea of separate consciousnesses, a closer approximation of reality, I gather.   Being God isn’t that big a deal.  Just another role to play.  Like a Father.   Some of us are more Godly than others.   Some people’s Gods aren’t other people’s Gods.   Atheism is a path to God.  So who cares!

You become what you hate - old yoga maxim

David, d.d.s.  (die, disconnect, or shut up!!!)