Thoughts of Book

Starting something 

Hello, dear reader.  Hi.  You are now reading a post by me, God.  My name is Jesse.  Jesse Teshara.  Believe it or not, there are two of us, (Jesses, not Gods), so I am obligated to state for the record that I am Jesse Lawrence Teshara.  I have no idea what the other one’s middle name is.  I doubt it’s Lawrence.  That would be super weird.  But Larry is my dad.  He goes by Mr. T, as did his father, my grandfather.  I googled my name.  You should, too!  It’s fun.  The other JT is from Livermore, I think.   I grew up in San Francisco.  Anyway, I am writing to share my kwuteo.  Say what? You ask.  Knowledge, wisdom, understanding, truth, enlightenment, omniscience.  Philosophically speaking, I don’t think omniscience is ever actually possible.  But maybe the internet, in a thousand years, might come close.  Also, the important stuff might be a more manageable quantity than all the trivia.  The devil is in the details.  God is the big picture.  God is infinite, they say, so there’s no bigger picture than that.  With an open mind, maybe I’m infinite, too.  I am my own reality.  Maybe everybody’s me, lol.  So writing is sharing.  It’s also a way to pass the time (me writing, you reading), in a healthy way (as long as you don’t go blind).  I would rather write than run amok, killing people, willy-nilly.  It’s also, as Coleridge said, my “literary remains.”   I imagine it will be fun to hold a published book in my hands, that I created.  I imagine all authors feel that.  A creation, like a baby.  No one lives forever.  And books aren’t permanent, either, I imagine.  Except reality.  Reality is all the god there ever is.  There’s always that.  I am a part of reality.  A drop of water in an endless sea.  Anyway, you can call me Mr. T, too, if you like.   Or maybe my brother would like to claim that.  T makes me think of Jesus’ crucifixion, though, to be honest.  That’s not a plus, in my book.  But JL makes me think of jail.  And JLT makes me think of jilt or jolted or jail time.  Maybe it’s not the best name.  But I like it.  It could also be Joy Love Truth, or Jesus lived through.   I’m adopted.  My birthmother’s name is Annette Riddle.  Jesse Riddle.  That sounds good, too.  No idea who my (birth)dad is.  Maybe Stollnitz, if Annette wasn’t wrong or lying.   Who shot JR?   JS?   JT?   3 letters in a row.  I never noticed that before.  Huh.  You learn by teaching.  You organize your thoughts by writing.  Other famous JTs include John Travolta, Justin Timberlake, JT Money, JT The Bigga Figga, James Taylor, and JT Brown.  My ex is Sara Brown.  I am currently single, and happy that way.  Maybe I could be much happier with a partner.  But I’m happy now, maybe a happy idiot, who knows.  The virus is disconcerting.  So I’m limiting contact, staying in, writing, and reading.   This could be another 9 months, maybe.   James Taylor says time isn’t really real.  Well, huh.  It’s always now, right?  Today is Friday the thirteenth.  Roll the dice.  13, you lose.  Well, everybody dies.  Enjoy the ride!  I read a hundred pages of short stories, today.  Good stuff.  Like the dates and apple juice I had for dinner.   Feed your head.   All-1.   One love.   Teshara is the Sara, as earth, as heart, as hater, and shat ear, lol.  Did Mike Tyson swallow?  Weird shit.

   

God.   Truth.  Reality.  Love.  Universe.  (glurt)!!!

Dios.  Allah.  Jah/Jehovah.  Yahweh.  Zeus.  Ra.  Odin. (J DAY ZRO)

  Trinity.  Father, Son, Holy Spirit.  Jesus Christ. (fsh)

  Trimurti.  Brahma, Siva, Vishnu.  Krishna.  (bsv)

Artemis, athena, apollo, ares, aphrodite, anubis, baldr, bast, demeter, dionysus, freyja, hades, hera, hephaestus, hermes, hestia, horus, isis, loki, odin, Osiris,  poseidon, Thoth

peace, happiness, and death

Poseidon, Horus, Demeter (PhD);  Invisible friends :-)

Keep writing

So.  So much to say.  Dumb Dave Mathews band.  

Treading trodden trails

Cold?  nose.  

Knows

No 

STARTING BOOK, starting over, starting again

Code in my knows

Cold in my nose

sorry, wrong foot

Is Being God, i.e playing the role, and writing God’s blog, insane?

Should I cease and desist?  Let go and let God, as it were? 

Can it be helpful and positive, or is it only destined to make things worse?

Well, the devil reads the Bible, too.  Reality is ultimately oblivion, and neutral.   So it’s all good.  Make some noise before you die.   Dogs bark.  People talk and write.

God is a word.  God is a concept.  I choose to embody it, and take on the role.   Much like Santa.  Or an adoptive father.  Neither is real.  But virtual reality is a kind of real reality, too.  Especially if you believe it.  Santa is in the fireplace, as is Satan, in the fire place, if you get my meaning.  Santa means ‘holy’ or ‘saint’, in spanish.  Saint ain’t S (Allah, or Satan, or Sara, or Sarah).  He knows if you’ve been bad or good, so be good for goodness’ sake.   So does she.   Santa/Saint= sani-t/sana-t!   Mrs. Claws.  He has his sleigh (slay!).   Marriage is like being mated, in chess.   Wait.  That's not right.   That has racist overtones of somehow unacceptable interracial marriage.   Wrong analogy.  The end.   Don’t get burned.  Cremation sounds creamy, though.

WCRIS

God is a word, a collection of concepts, made real by playing the role until it becomes an identity, with the hope of it becoming an actual status.   God is a number.  Number 1.  

All the world’s a stage.  We all want a better world.  That’s what religion is about.  The Kingdom, Heaven, Paradise, utopia, bliss, shambala,  Positivity and Cheer.  Friendship, family, happiness, joy, ecstasy, comfort, fun, laughter, song, dance, celebration, contentment, satisfaction, health, wealth, peace, safety, security, satiety, kindness, mercy, forgiveness, compassion, sympathy, empathy, hope, warmth, love.  Even atheists are on board with all that!  Well, I realize sometimes we like to mope and be gloomy, wallowing in misery, listening to the cure and cutting ourselves, that sort of thing, too.

Hindus consider atheism a path to God.   Thank God I’m an atheist, lol.  Faith may seem silly and superstitious, but there are benefits for belief.  Taking on the role of God may be the only way to make it real, for me.  But for others, they submit.  Islam means submission.  So God is real, either way.  You can be number one.  Or you can be part of something greater than yourself.  Now everybody’s me!  Morpheus is the God of dreams.  Neo is one, rearranged.   Lucifer is light ("light-bringer").  And Harry Potter is a happy place.  Making any story real, like in movies, involves suspension of disbelief.  If you die a believer, then maybe you don’t suffer as much.   Some people need to believe in immortality. 

I don’t believe.   I don’t believe in souls, heaven, angels, a creator god, or immortality.   But you are free to, if you like.  God is love, and love believes all things.  I believe in me.  I exist.  I am not a program in a machine.  God, love, the universe, reality, truth - GLURT!

And GEO (goodness, everything, one).   My bro (ur GLT), as well.

glurtgeo. EOU GGLRT.   

LEG YOGURT. 

(love everything good, yahweh one god, universe reality truth)   

O struggle.  

(One S Truth Reality Universe Goodness God Love Everything)

well, I tried.

Omg

Omigod

Omigosh

Oh my Gawd. 

ANYway, am I God, really?  My voice said so.

'You're God as fuck' it said

God is good.  Only God is good.  God is one.  I am.  

God is love.  Love believes all things.  I love me.  
Edgar, my landlord, bought a mirror with "Luvodi" on it.  You get the picture.  A lot of people are praying to me, these days.   To anyone good, out there.  Pandemic, elections, climate change, war in Syria and Yemen, oppression, poverty, obscene inequality...

good luck with all that.   maybe I can breathe up some good weather, with my godly butterfly effect or something.  Or I won't do jumping jacks and cause earthquakes.  Or I'll refrain from fantasizing about anything criminal.  Or maybe I'll make a difference and a billionaire will give you money, out of a pang of conscience, or feeling simpatico.  Or you'll make good of a bad situation and get some reading done, get your shit together, as you shelter-in-place.   Death highlights what's really important in our puny, meaningless lives.  You can eat well, cheaply, clean and just drink water.  You can exercise in your room.   You can read my blog or wikipedia or whatever off the internet.  You can catch up on actual paper books.  You can play with your children.