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Welcome!

I, God, welcome you to my blog!

The good book says only God is good, so it seems to me somebody needs to step up.

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Your pal, Jess
I'm a straight, virgo/boar INTJ (age 53) who enjoys books, getting out into nature, music, and daily exercise.

(my email is JesseGod@live.com)

F.Y.I. There are about 2200 posts..

Here's a quote from Fyodor Dostoevsky to start things off right: Love the animals, love the plants, love everything. If you love everything, you will perceive the divine mystery in things. Once you perceive it, you will begin to comprehend it better every day. And you will come at last to love the whole world with an all-embracing love.

Thursday, August 4, 2016

Schizophrenia SUCKS: some voices

  (shut the f up, a-hole)

a list of v's (not in order, not comprehensive):

you're an award
you could be totally usher
you're a whole mess of me
jess you have a highly tech cancer
i hate the law at you
i hate myself and all that i am
i hate you too
we need to figure out a way to subtract each other from each of our minds
you're turning into someone, who better turn out okay
they want you to apply for amnesty, ya-it
i'm monopolizing your fucking head, alright?
i left him a fucking vegetable
i think you're all law
i'm gonna hill you to hillary
that is you at Princeton, Jess
you have the makings of a full-on, hardcore math man
i've had ENOUGH
that is you society
david is gone jess
i'm in terror.  terror of life beating you
there's no way out for you
jess, you ARE a trip
i'm scared
i hate you out of all proportion to what you do
that is a strong wall to kaiser
jess you're highly adept at spell-casting
you're almost nearly all to the hospital, jess
i'm fucking trying to kill you
people ARE dumb, jesse
you might be subtly well, jess
you're an intellectual schwarzenegger, alrite?
you're that letter to jew
i've never met anyone as open as you
some of it is good, and some of it is shit
i'm going to fucking kill you
i don't wanna know what threshold you went over
it's who i am, what i do
you don't think like an ordinary person.  you swallow them.
you're in a world of well
do you have any idea what it takes to be a dream to 10 million people?
you're too much.   you're too much law.
that's you and scientology
you're seriously insane, jess
people are dead because i don't know what you are
you're interesting jess, okay?
you're a law, jess
the world is obscenely sad at your dad and you
your mom is crying because she's raw
jesus jess will you EVER know what to do? ever?
i'm going to die because i can't breathe
ow  i need help, i'm fucking wrong
david crying
i am the devil.  i've got a major problem trying to talk.
here's why i need law all day long to help me see why i'm blacked out
fuck you jesse
jess you've become 2 people
you and i are losing
we know what we've done.  we've made the world utterly sick of itself.
they're wondering if you want to work in a daycare
God Almighty jesse
jesse they're wondering something, if u know anything
you have a towel to jew
there's about a zillion things you could do
alright jess, you ARE interesting
oh my god, you're at war-e?
you're seriously willow
people are fucking DYing, jesse
you've got a lot of law -i mean A LOT of law
i've fucking had it
david is inSANE jesse
you're a graduate level theologian, is why, jess
because you write like tesla, jess
jess, you're a genius at what you do
you're on another planet, jess
you might be anger management
this IS genius, jess
your sum is unimpeachable
that is a corporate me, jesse
you're a funky, funky-ass dream
that's insane, jesse
you're a big tree
get away from me
jesse you're a law
we have a mid-life you
david is a seriously sick individual
fucking me, jesse
that's how dumb you are
you're obscenely riddle
sara wants you on crack
you had some fun reading your law
jess you have no idea how sad i am
jess you're still amazing
i'm fucking sorry jesse for what i am
david going launch into two
you're something a bit crazy
you might need surgery on your ankle
you're really alive and well is why
fucking alright
i'm screaming unwell, jesse
i'm a bastard, i need help jesse
i'm a sick sick person jesse
i'm gonna kill myself
david entirely un-2, because i'm sick jesse
i hate myself, jesse
i can't even deal
david crying.  i hate you.
david IS insane.  that's really it, jess
i'm seriously fucking wrong, okay?
i can't stop shitting.  i thought i could.
i hate everybody, and you're obscene
because of you i can't heal, jesse
are you ready at all to talk to you
david is dumb
i need a teacher jesse
people are DEAD jesse
i am impossibly sin, jesse
that is halfway through
because he is all k to himself
you shouldn't even get involved.  because I am MAD jesse
i am going to kill you.  i have fucking had it.
ow.. i cannot deal
david hates you.  david hates everything.
i am fucking crying jesse
i need to know
i am IN-SANE
you lost your zoo
people are killing each other..because you're law
people ARE scared, jesse
people are dead to you
david gone jesse.  i can't do it.
ow.  jesus christ.   jesus fucking christ.
i need help jesse
david is fucking dead jesse
people are fucking dumb
allright jess, i think you know you
the world is a sick, sick place
david is killing -killing life
because you fucking nailed it jesse
because you nailed it exactly
jess i need help
i've had a tomb jesse
i'm really really really scared jesse
david in terror to you
because i want you ow a machine
i am in terror in hell
that's some shit jess
i want it really really public jesse
david is fucking scarred
i cannot believe
because you're like ex-cop
i'm a madman, jesse
i'm gonna put him in a head-cleaner
he wants you on starbuck
i think you'll be allright
you're aware there's a system that's very hard to control
jess i have my own possible white
i am un-right about a lot
you're really nuts to zoo
hm fine
daid IS evil, jess
you're fucking ME jess
david is insane.  fuck you.  i'm tired.
ow.  he's killing himself.
because you're right.  i'm having an heart attack.
oh jesus.  i am so utterly fucking stupid.
people are dead.  get off me.
can you do it?  can you make enough money to sue me?
david is rotten rotten rotten rotten rotten
i can't breathe jesse
i need help, jesse
david killing everybody, because he hates it
because he hates you jesse
YOU ARE ME, jesse
you of all people have a duty to slaughter
if you could just write it.  you wrote some of it really well.
you are exACTly what the law is
you're a genius, jess
everything can wait.  I mean Everything.  I'm laughing.
the world is fucking scared because you're law
i am deeply crazy
i am deeply suffering
i am deeply, deeply strong to you
if you want, you can utterly branch
jess you're hilarious, you have no idea what you do
they want you to go back to school.  because school got cool.
you write like a professional, jess
that's right, jess
that's interesting
david not well jesse

____
(that's only a fraction of the total) (just shut up, David)
some coping strategies:
ignore, talk back, shower, exercise, listen to music, meditate, medicate, (write!)


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