The darkest, most evil and wicked, sinful and depraved, monster from the depths of hell, burst from his underworld captivity, with a ferocity and malice never before seen on the earth-realm. First, the freeway developed sink holes, and radiating cracks, and tongues of flame came licking out of fissures in the cement, concrete, asphalt, pavement. Then screaming voices in a discordant kind of cacophony tormented the ears of anyone with ears to hear. Finally, THE BEAST Himself. Bigger, possibly, than a sperm whale, the Colossus - on par with Godzilla, you could say- exploded into the lives of hapless commuters and upended life on earth as we know it, for all, forevermore. He unfolded his wings, gave them some trial flaps, and proceeded to breathe fire and rain destruction down on anyone and anything in his path.
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Well, hello there again, gang! How goes? How went that drunken orgy of madness I heard about in the grapevine? You know, those talking grapes. Very social, those fruits. Either tell me what you know, or I masticate you into pulp and juice and swallow you whole! Don’t tell the other grapes that I’m going to eat them, anyway, no matter what (OR NOTHING!) they say. Don’t whine. In vino, veritas. V no. hmm.
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The kindest cop, the most forgiving police officer, building community and relationships, and giving all delinquents up to strike 3…. With a charitable understanding of the law, and an open and even enlightened understanding of society and antisocial tendencies, making clear that there is a line, and once crossed, there will be adverse consequences, nobody to blame but yourself, so you better be good, you better not pout, or cry, cuz he knows if you’ve been bad or good, so be good for goodness’ sake!
