BULLYING

“Bullyism” - Kelli

Buddhism and Bullying

The word has nothing to do with bulls, bullfights, bulldogs, bullshit, the Bible, etc.   In fact, it first meant “sweetheart,” believe it or not.  Bullyism seems to be an original coinage by Kelli, who happens to be my current sweetheart.  If she threatened to eat my heart with sugar, that would be bullying, but I don’t suspect much chance of that.   However, my espousing of the Buddhist doctrine of impermanence, no-soul, and God as delusion, may have rubbed her the wrong way (she’s Christian).   Buddhist philosophy has an orthodox “right view”, which rubs me the wrong way, as well.  I don’t believe in giving up sense pleasures, or believe in rebirth, in any realm whatsoever, good or bad, as karma for virtue or evil, as reincarnation on earth, or transfer to a hell realm, or animal realm, or whatever it may be.  So we each have our own differences with Buddhism (and with each other).   I suspect that’s true of almost anyone!

Anyway, bullying is coercion to abuse or intimidate others, with the goal of harming the victim.  Coercion is involuntary compulsion.  Harm is injury or discomfort.  The abuse is usually systematic and repeated over time, verbal or physical or psychological, either by an individual or a group (mobbing), and always with hostile intent, characterized by an imbalance of power, in order to gain power or dominate, by harassing, threatening, or assaulting another (for being different, or -as the case may be- for being the same), to cause to submit and obey and conform and comply and acquiesce.  Or feel bad.  Or die.

Bullying is a form of aggression, discrimination, and oppression.  It causes stress, anxiety, depression, and can sometimes contribute to suicide.  It targets people and property, for various reasons that include class, race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, appearance, behavior, body language, personality, reputation, lineage, strength, size, and ability.  Cyberbullying allows anonymity.  Teachers can facilitate prevention and intervention, but can ALSO engage in subtle covert abuse, harming relationships or social status, hostility, humiliation and abasement of pride, and exclusion.   It can range from taunting and teasing to threat and intimidation to beating people up.  It often escalates.  

I do not like bullying.  I associate it with psychopathy.  It should be illegal, and IS in 23 states (of America).  No one likes to be picked on.  Name-calling and belittling is childish and immature, and adults should not be calling each other ugly, stupid, weak, poor, and crazy (etc.).   As my mom, a former social worker, said, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will ALWAYS hurt me.”   Which is an exaggeration, but the point stands.   People are sensitive, and hurtful words can hurt.  Mean and disrespectful words can cause lasting misery, resentment, and trauma.  Like racism.   Self-hatred is insidious.  As is withdrawal and rage.  

Adjectives I apply to bullys and bullying are: unfair, unjust, ignorant, cruel, stupid, rude, nasty, vicious, insulting, disrespectful, sinful, criminal, immoral, unthinking, unwise, repugnant, wicked, evil, and ugly.   I experience a peculiar form of psychic oppression, or psycho psychological psychiatric psychosis, in which my brain experiences shocks, apparently for what or how I think.  ANYway, if it’s purely natural (my meds, say) or more insidious (mathematical hypnotic programming?), I can relate.   Adults experience bullying, too.  Legal harassment and petty lawsuits can drain you of energy, and sap you of time, and rob you of money - depriving you of LIFE!  Rape is an extreme form of bullying.  The “bully pulpit” of your priest or minister can be uncomfortable.  Anyone who abuses their power, like cops or bosses or professors or politicians, should be straightened out, immediately.   I’m saying I’m God.  Is that an abuse of power? I don’t think so.  Parents often abuse their power over their children.  There’s emotional abuse, and control over their lives (limited freedom).  But most parents aren’t bullies, I think.  Anyway, in conclusion, bullying is evil.   Prevent it, and don’t do it.   God bless.