Ways to die

 Weight, Dye ?   

i.e. overweight, underweight, taxed organ systems, black face, bulimia, anorexia nervosa, starvation, drought, isolation, poverty

Every Possible Threat to You

punched, hit, kicked, elbowed, kneed, slammed, tripped, thrown, submitted

slashed, stabbed, shot, bruised, battered, broken, beaten, bashed, blasted

Old age, senescence, cellular replication

Diseases (x _____) (y categories) - 

    around 19,000 distinct diseases / (plus?) 10,000 rare ones

Hit by a bus, car crash, drunk driving, no seat belt

Wrong place at wrong time, bad luck

Hit by an asteroid, hit by a home run, foul ball, baseball (sun in your eyes?)

Soda machine falls on you, piece of space junk

Earthquake the ground swallows you up, building falls down

Tidal wave, big wave surfing error, drowning

Terrorist attack

cigarrettes, cigars, secondhand smoke, pipes, chewing tobacco

Airplane malfunction

Hurricane / cyclone, tornado / twister  

Flood, drought, starvation

Killed by a vampire, eaten by a cannibal

Die in your sleep (killed by a dream?)

Weight falls on you (weightlifting mishap)

Medication, drugs, interaction effects, side effects, addiction, overdose

Recklessness

Homicide, Suicide

A car crashes into your house

Heart attack

One of the 16 cancers from smoking (or emphysema)

Gun accident (oops, it was loaded, or oops, that wasn’t shooting blanks)

Poisoning

Blunt force trauma

Sword, knife, throwing star, grenade

Assassin

Bomb

Starting a fisticuff fight

Driving on the wrong side of the street

Power outage, life support systems

Bee stings

Fall off a horse

Struck by a car

Black magic curse, voodoo pin cushion doll, bad juju

Karma, you pos

Giving up

Sadness

Dangerous work (mining, military)

   mercenary, soldier of fortune

Criminals eliminating witnesses

Crossing the wrong guy

Bit by a rabid dog

Cow-tipping

Holding your breath

Strenuous over-exertion

Attempting to exsanguinate, you silly vampire

Overeating, exploding (impacted colon)

Getting beat up (gangs, prison, outside sports arenas, etc.)

MMA, hockey body check

Sports hard foul

Pollution, air, water, soil, secondhand smoke

Running into a wall, a tree, a glass door

Gladiator competition, fight club

Hunting accident

Undertow 

Rogue waves

Running out of oxygen

The bends

Jousting mishap

Wrestling, crossing the line

Looking at somebody the wrong way

Getting eaten alive (dropped into an alligator pit?)

Quicksand

Falling into the ice

Dehydration, salt water

Landslide, avalanche

Collateral damage

Sniper 

slit throat

Surgical strike

Blowing your top, fury

Sacrifice

Elevated risk, lowered self-defense, apathy

Suicidal tendencies

Hit by a train

Jump off a bridge

Out of your depth, biting more than you can chew

Unprepared

Thrill-seeking

Lion-taming and alligator wrestling and snake-handling

Bullfighting, toreador

Overconfidence

Bad lucks

Falling victim to a mass-murderer or serial killer

Falling asleep with a cigarette 

Guillotined

The sun explodes

Eaten by a lion

Long covid

Too many cigars

Sunburned too often

Ate the wrong kind of mushroom

Affliction too far from hospital, ambulance, care

Sedentary lifestyle, too much sitting, tv

Fireworks explosion mishap

your boat struck an iceberg

Asphyxiation, strangulation

Pain

Trained professionals only, do not attempt to do this on your own

Messing with powers you can’t possibly comprehend

Universal malice, nobody likes you, everybody hates you

Electrocution

Defenestration

frightened to death, horror

Overworked

Bored to death

Mortal combat

War

tickle torture

self-defense, preemptive self defense

yada yada, on and on, time itself

stupidity

left for dead

Pai Mei's five point palm exploding heart technique!

beheading, smash mouth, 5 finger death punch, nasal bone impact, knuckle to temple, uppercut to chin, throat chop, a move practiced a thousand times "that cannot fail"

Seize the See's Candy

Morality and Ethics and Virtue and the Good

Life is short, seize the day.   Do what makes you happy.   Happiness is the highest Virtue.   Bliss is exceptional happiness.   Like Nirvana, or Heroin, or Being in love, or Being elected President, or Getting an A+, or Orgasm, or getting lost in a really good book, or Winning the lottery, or Listening to mind-blowing music, or Waking up from a really good dream, or Getting published, or coming out of a really good movie, or A delicious meal, or a massage, or Saving a life, or Feeling the Pump, or getting compliments, or Winning, or Dying Well.   Making a ton of money.   Inventing something.  Making measurable progress.  Making people laugh.   Being wise, and knowledgeable, and right, and educated, informed, and learning a lot, quickly.   Giving gifts.   Being useful, of service, helpful, appreciated.    Respect.  Getting a personal best.  Happy no matter what.   Resilient, long-lived.   Having made a difference.  You worked hard, you gave it your all.  You reached the top.   You achieved perfection.  You were the best.  You read all the good books.  You travelled.  You made many friends.  You made the world a better place.  

You were good, virtuous, kind, friendly, helpful, there for people, positive, grateful, and compassionate.   You made people feel good.  When you die, you will be missed.  You made the world a better place, inspired people, and were sexy, interesting, and fun.   You laughed and brought joy,  were playful and funny.   You had a profound sense of priorities, of what really matters, of mission and purpose and values, and had an iron will to bring positive change to a profoundly fuct up world.  You brought escape, and taught us how to live, deeply engaged, for the good of all.   You respected all people.  You grokked the human condition.  You loved life, and your enthusiasm was contagious.  

You lived life to extremes, were never bored or boring, and engaged with everyone and everything, forging your own philosophy in the process, and leaving behind a body of work that tells the Truth, for the eternal Enlightenment of All.  You probed limits, contrasted opposites, declared preferences, and always sought The Best.  

Other virtues, besides love, happiness, bliss, joy, and contentment are health and wealth, of course (prior conditions), and pleasure.  Pleasure is good food, drink, conversation, music, movies, books, sex, massage, and endorphins from working out.   Variety and trying new things.   The comfort to your soul of being in Nature,  and of the many ways of being happy around water.  Pleasure is succeeding in achieving a goal, the satisfaction of accomplishment, and the reward of doing your best, really creating positive change.   Helping people help themselves.   Helping the poor, with charity.   Eating clean and healthy and with less chemicals and more concern for animal quality of life, even happiness.   Life is good, and you lived the good life.  

Lent

lend a hand!   (said one robot to another)

'Lent' comes from OE for Spring (the season, not mattress component), an Ent is the walking tree characters from Lord of the Rings; Len reminds me of Ellen (and lenticular clouds, lentils, and lentic*)

*lentic means inhabiting or near clear still water, fresh water, like lakes, ponds, swamps, and marshes.  All you limnologists know what I'm talking about!  woop woop.    Lenticular means biconvex, which means convex on both sides (as of a lens, or cloud).    Lens is a colorful term for perspective, used by Sociologists.   Like rose-colored glasses, or through the looking-glass.   For example, I conceive of illness through the lens of science, and thus doctors and their tests, not superstition or intuition.

Anyway, Catholic Lent begins today, as I was reminded.    It's a time for prayer, fasting, penitence, and alms.  It's 40 weekdays, to commemorate Jesus' fasting in the wilderness for that amount of time (this year, between 2/18-4/2).   What are alms?   gifts of food, money, etc. to the poor.    Penitence is feeling sorrow, regret, and repentance for having done wrong.  Does the word fasting have anything to do with speed?  No, it has to do with holding firm and observing a rule, steadfastly (also, from OE).   For those that might be a little "slow," that rule is abstaining from food, NOT going to a fast food restaurant (ha).  

Where was the wilderness Jesus fasted in?  The Judaean desert.   After which, he was tempted by Satan.   He passed that test, apparently.  Then what?  He returned to Galilee, to begin his ministry.   And maybe some minestrone soup, too, one might imagine.

Demons

 Zombies, Vampires, Werewolves, Monsters, hellions, and other dangerous bloodthirsty beasties

Zombies are undead.   That is to say, they are the living dead.    I realize that makes no sense.  They're like animated corpses.   They survive on human flesh, with a craving for brains.   If they don't kill you, their bite will turn you into one of them.  So it's like a contagious disease, that multiplies into great armies of ambling, stumbling, brainless ghouls that stop at nothing until they devour every human's brain.  You can of course blow them to bits with shotguns or cut off their heads or whatever, but barring that, they just keep on coming.   They climb out of their cemetery plots, with various amounts of flesh attached, and walk slowly toward anything that moves.  The Cranberries sang about them.

Vampires are also undead, but rise nightly to subsist on human blood.   They are nocturnal carnivores, and are far more dangerous and threatening than zombies.  They're basically alive, but think they're dead, and like to think of themselves as another race, superhuman and superior, despite really only being psychotic serial-killers, in truth and fact.  Anne Rice wrote about them.   Some of them have fangs.  They can be a pain in the neck.  They are averse to sunlight and garlic and crucifixes, and turn to dust if you stab them in the heart with a sharp pointy thing (stake).   I think a shotgun or beheading would also work on them, too, really.   Vampires will drink you dry, drink you dead, but can multiply if they feed blood back to you, transforming you into one of them, in the process.  Maybe they're a warning to stay sober and not get drunk.   Anyway, the big deal about them is they're supposedly immortal.   But if you kill nightly,  you will get caught, and who wants to spend eternity behind bars?  Or even in the lake of fire of Hell?  In fear of pain and suffering, such as being locked up in a box, etc.   So, being made a vampire is a kind of curse.  You become a bloodthirsty predator, under constant threat of eternal torments, from malice and revenge, being hated.  A spiritual warfare attack.  

There's the other kind of vampire, the psychic kind, that drain you of prana or chi or whatever, and with it, the will to live.  Like dementors.  They work you to death, and make you feel guilty, or nauseous, or weak, or sad.   They're thieves that rob you of the will to live.  Like there's no point, no meaning, no purpose.   No love, only malice.   Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, I'm gonna eat some worms! Remember that?  "Note: vampires are creatures of folklore and fiction, and not scientifically real." -google

Werewolves are hybrid animals, that transform from regular human to big, murderous, carnivorous, man-eating wolves, when the moon is full.   They can be killed with silver bullets, says the lore.  Hairy Potter, lol.  Anyway, the movies always show the skeleton stretching, and the hair growing, and the face transforming, until the afflicted human becomes something else, entirely (for the duration of the full moon).   It's like a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde thing, with the moon instead of a potion, and they often try and lock themselves up, so as not to kill their friends or whatever.   A complete and dissociated transformation, that they are helpless to prevent.  People are weird.   One person can become multiple.   We play roles, sometimes saints, sometimes sinners, or even angels and demons.  Life is good!   Sometimes, we think everybody is everything.   If it's in Nature, it's natural.

Monsters can be real or virtual.   Maybe people get scared of entities in their dreams.   Or think roles they've seen in movies are more real than most people give them credit for.   I think the woman who blew her trumpet at me in downtown Davis assaulted me, came close to giving me a heart attack.  Prisons are full of monsters.  Not just the giants, either.    The malicious and vicious, who get off on beatings, rape, getting away with murder, forming racist gangs, and just plain hostility, or bothering people, making people hate themselves, or not letting them be happy, pushing buttons, or intimidating, insulting, punishing, tormenting, assaulting, or disturbing the peace.   Noisy and annoying and unremitting threat.   A monster can be a mosquito as much as a Godzilla.   Either can kill you.

ghosts, cannibals, unreal virtual entities - I don't believe in ghosts, but if you look for them, you can find spirits everywhere, the mind is a vast and strange place.  You can be haunted by memories, and imagination.   Demonic bears, or a mere 2mg of fentanyl...  The Irukandji jellyfish is one of the smallest (cubic cm) animals, as well as most venomous animals on earth.   6000 pound hippos and 2200 pound saltwater crocodiles, on the larger side.   Threats of all types and sizes.

Hellions, people whose world is self-defined as unpleasant, miserable, hated, annoying, sad, uncomfortable, scary, even savage, or -  tormented / torture.   People who cannot bring themselves to a higher state of acceptance, helpfulness, service, kindness, or virtue.   It's a long hard road out of hell, as they say.   Residents of Hell can be hopeless and give-up, even occupying insane virtual worlds of belief in being unforgiven, and destined for eternal punishment, because there is not a drop of goodness in them, much less a future of eternal reward.   Hell is a state of unhappiness.   But eventually we learn No one lives forever, and can take comfort in evanescence.  But misery loves company, and Hellions can be contagious, believing in eye for an eye, until the whole world is blind.  Fairness demands suffering, they think.  Everyone has original sin.   Or every single one of us, the devil inside.   Or cruelty is necessary: "cruel to be kind,"  or identify with The Dark Side, and be pro-war or pro-abortion or pro-pain.   Many take pleasure in telling lies, disseminating delusions, and confusion and trickery.   War is hell, and the art of war is deception.  Like life isn't fair, the whole world can go to hell.   Heaven be damned.  

Carnivores.  All these demons eat meat.   Humans are demons, in that respect.  I am.

Maybe human blood is delicious.  Maybe the hunt is exciting, and the murder a thrill.   Maybe there's an element of justice, or even virtue, to the criminal act.   Yada yada.   I'm not going down that road, to that world.  

to be continued...

HH

Heavenly Host

The party in the sky.   Earth is in the sky.  Definitely pie in the sky.   Like a Nation's for the dead.   Airplanes, and parachuting, and roller coasters, and all the good things in life, whatever that means.  Fill in the blank.   What are you grateful for?  Being Alive, so that you can in fact feel anything.   Well, we can dream, can't we?  A lifetime of joy, lasting for thousands (millions? billions?) of years!  AMEN

demons and deities- "although a foundational aspect of the world-view and reality of many,  there is no definitive empirical evidence to prove or disprove the existence of a deity" - google

Higher Powers, on the other hand, are EVERYwhere.   :-)

wp:  which rich wretched witch-wench stole my watch?    Details and dog tails.   Catholics and alcoholic cats.   Mouseketeers and Aristocats.   AA hair:  Kinky, curly, and coil-y (and Moe!);  a cool collection of classic cars to see!;   Dudley Do-right eats Doritos!   Are you ready for the royal Riyadh rumble?  No, nyet, not.

today, I bought:  lillies, protein bar, almond danish, spinach dip, sourdough roll, egg burrito, cobb salad, gallon milk, strawberry cereal, eggs, bacon, (and a ghost pepper chicken sandwich with a sprite and cajun fries from Popeye's).

It's all in your head;  everything is mind;  reality is a mental hospital! (huh?)

zoanthropic transformation to a dog? an ant?   spirit animal - IR weasel?  a turtle (never homeless)?  fly like an eagle, to the sea, let my spirit carry me - Steve Miller band;  kafkaesque dung beetle?  And Lev Grossman's depiction!   What it is to be a bat!   Batman, Spiderman, Catwoman, Hanuman...  In addition to werewolves, D&D has wererats.  (Teshara: he's a rat - the letters also contain Hare, Tahr, Stare, and Sear)   :-)

Silence

sigh lenten lentils

taxes in Texas, coyly erotic Iroquois, Nero shot an arrow, Shawn the Shawnee, Cher is part Cherokee?  Cindy, you sinful D!  (smelly Kelli, messy Jesse, and windy Cindy!)  dirty Kurt.   my instinct is to stink inside.   Outstinct?   toilet, toy let / lit, holy throne seat (seat with a hole in it, anyway), throne up

GOD, Glad Overjoyed, Delighted;    

          Grumpy Ornery (Dour, Dismal, Dust)

          Gone, Over, Dead

Don't say you're God;   Don't say you're not God (golden silencer)

Don't worry.   Is God a psycho killer?  Qu'est-ce  que c'est?

A unicorn with an erection

God is full of Himself (emptiness?)

dog-walking and God-walking!

feel free to flee, flea

hear here, see the sea, smell smelt, touch and attach, taste toast

I love the Louvre, but hate the heat

silent reflective introspection and sitting meditation:   enjoy the silence - Depeche Mode;  the sound of silence - Simon and Garfunkel;  4m 33s -John Cage

sigh, lint - I need a lint roller thing

calm, still, quiet, peaceful, undisturbed;  just Be

antichrist?  I'm not for or against him.   I believe he's dead.   So he doesn't care what I think.   I don't know Christ.   I know Christians.   I'm not anti-Christian, either.    I just think they're weird and wrong.   But I grew up, Catholic.   It's still fun to go to Mass, once in awhile, like comfort food, or to have a good think.  I don't call non-Christians antichrists.   But sometimes people think if you're not with us, you're against us. 

If you want to be biblical, you have to be good to merit heavenly reward.   But only God is good.   So you become God (the concept, role, identity, or even status).  God is love.  And Love "believes all things."  Yikes!  Is that even possible?  Like a quantum computer, believing different things, simultaneously, until they resolve - with time.   Anyway, love life.   Love all of it.   Even the delusions and delusional.

talking snakes, lions, goats, and lambs.   Lots of weirdness, symbolism, stuff to chew on, think about.  A little bird told me the crow will caw 3x.  I heard it through the grapevine.

Adam's atomism and Eve in the evening.    mourning in the morning.  knights at night.  No one works nine to noon?  Nuns?  Nein!

gopher snake.   pituophis catenifer.   catenifer means "chain bearing".   non-poisonous.   I caught one when I was a kid.   they live up to 30 years, in captivity.  I remember pinching it's neck because I didn't want it to bite me.   Sorry, dude.  Cool serpent.   Snakes don't talk.   But if they could!  I slithered yonder and used my subtle treachery to catch a rat!   Mm, delicious rattus.  

Veni, Vidi, Vici -  Venial, VD (venereal disease), and Vicki!  I came, I saw - Victoria.  I conquered Concord.    King Kong eats curd.

Happy Groundhog Day, F the 13th, President's Day, Black History Month, Valentine's Day, Chinese Lunar New Year, Winter Olympics, Ramadan, Lent, and Mardi Gras!

So I sew so-so.  So?

Journal Entry

 Good morning (good afternoon).  I slept in.  Re is awake.  She just went back to bed.  The sound machine is on.  White nose thing, or whatever, from Sharper Image.  On creek setting.  The traffic outside rolls by, with a kind of waves on the beach sound, if you tell your head to interpret it that way.   Except for the sirens.  We have incense burning, too.  “Money” scented incense (or something!).   Incense, like a candle, demarcates time.  And we all know time is money.  Yesterday was Valentine’s Day.   So flowers should be cheap, today.   Re just wants lillies, so I have to go look and fetch. 

We started reading Sophie’s World, aloud to each other.   We each read a chapter.   The third chapter awaits.   I like reading to Re.  For now, I can just sit (and write) while Re rests.  I’m charging my computer.   I can listen to music on my headphones, or read the WB (or both).  Or I can meditate, and focus on my breath.  Horizontal meditation?  I need to do pushups, and maybe I should eat my GNC protein powder.  The kitchen looks great.   I love going to the kitchen.   I could call my mom, too.   The blog is at 63.   Yesterday went up to 79.  It’s only 1:31p.  (page views).  I always say I got x.    I should be saying My Blog Got x (Page Views).   But people understand.  Right?  I got 80 today.  My blog got 80 page views today.   You know.  My library book has another week on it.  I want to finish it in time.   Maybe some kid needs it.   My goal is a hundred pages a day (for like 7 days), so I can stay in the time frame.  But I have an Economist, too.   Both demand my time and attention.   I’m writing.   We’ve started Sophie’s World.   Busy, busy!

The Hutchinson CK company the Economist was writing about is NOT my brother’s company.   It just sounds like it.   I have spitball shooters for Ben and Dec.   I doubt the parents will approve.  Poor Liz.   Her big brother died in his sleep, just the other night.  I’m not sure I ever met Dan.  Ugh.  

Sunday, but not sunny.   A bit overcast, which is nice, in Berkeley.  Today I will: read WB, check blog at 4p, maybe read some Economist or Sophie’s World, and listen to music.  I’ll eat some of Michael’s lentils, and maybe some GNC powder.   Do some pushups.   Artcast awaits, as well.  My day, by Jesse Teshara.   Happy Sunday.  No church.   I slept.  Candles,  incense, and creek noise fills the room, as the minutes tick by.   Re sleeps.  Blog views add up and accumulate.   634,590 is my Total.    Over half a million.   I’m turning into McDonald’s.  X served!

I wish I had people in my life who read my blog.   I tell myself I don’t need validation, but it’s nice to get commentary, opinions, reaction, in any case.  I mean, I’m not writing to the Void!!!

What do you think?   What’s good?  What sucks?

wp

Aides with AIDS, born in the sign of Cancer with cancer, having a cold in the cold, bird flu /flew, dead before dying, sick and tired of being sick and tired, infested festivals, weak this week, and healthy in thy hell?  ill in Illinois, and well on welfare, and sick with sickle cell disease, and Cyrus has a virus in her iris, while erections sometimes carry infections, and there's the wheeze disease, and the bibliophile's addiction to fiction, (meals are most real), and the government tries to prevent the production of poisonous toys.  Just breathe.   Don't seethe.  Health, wealth, stealth, not filth.   Infected and infested with incesticide.   Injured ninja.  Insane pain and plainly sane, like manatee sanity, whatever floats your boat, with comfort and ease, like Mumford in the trees.  Presto!  presta valves and pesto!  all better :-).   Allah, peanut butter sandwiches!    Pure, no sin, clean as a whistle, as holy as Swiss cheese!  The smell of sin upon sin replaced by cinnamon raisins?   vaseline, lysterine, and glycerine?

stressy Jesse, anxious Hank, nervous in the service, scared to share, a worried jury, in terror of error, frightened of fighting, and hating fate, that is, death by meth - without breath, but what if- on the mend, without end, eternally infernal, or infinitely bit, or always in Galway, forever pulling levers, or nonstop mopping (!).    Good gawd, Rod - we'll all be in the sod, you odd wad of a dirt clod!

4 ways of saying the same thing:

1. As Adi Da said, Reality is all the God there ever is.   God is reality, and reality god.   Reality is made of God.   God is love.  The universe loves you.   Or, at least, an indifferent universe doesn't hate you.  

2. Allah is all.   Aha!   The beneficent, the merciful.   BM.

3. Catholicity means 'universality', so in a way, everything is Christian, too.  Catholic means "universal."   (Mostly empty space, but whatever).   ST:   spacetime is saintly?  ("ooh God, you are so Big! -Monty Python).  TV is probably far more interesting than The Vast, excepting the odd astronomer or astrophysicist, I suppose.

4. It's all good!!  Respect!

initial conditions, one thing leads to another, great chain of being, lead and what follows, prime mover ex nihilo or something!

hierarchies and lower-archies.    superhuman and subhumans.   I'm only human.  You can Big Up yourself, or you can think of yourself as a gnat (Hi, Nat), at the same time, in fact.    Simultaneously Big and Small, looking at yourself from both perspectives.   There's always a bigger fish.  You are your own Universe (and can even imagine a universe inside your skull), yet you are a mote and a blip, too.   Just do you.  It is what it is.   Honey, I shrunk the kids.   And one of the kids is a monster!   Like a vile vicious vampire in a vast vacuous void!   Drunk dry.